think they should do, you make comments like 'Yes mother,' and when you tell people what to do you expect them to jump into action? You wouldn't be just a tiny bit sexist would you Homer?"
That was like asking a fish if it was a tiny bit wet.
"Ellie, I know you hate it when you don't get your own way on every little thing..."
"Oh yes? And when's the last time I got my own way on anything?"
"Oh oh! You're asking me? Try this morning at breakfast, when you stopped Chris lighting the fire. Try two hours ago, when you wouldn't let Lee open a can of peaches."
"Yeah, and you notice something about both those times? I'm trying to do the right thing by us, by this group! I'm trying to keep us alive! If anyone sees smoke out of here, we're dead. If we pig out on all the food we're in big trouble. I'm not just saying stuff for my own sake, because I like to hear my own voice, you know."
"You ought to listen to others more Ellie. You keep wanting to be a one-man band."
Now I was really mad.
"Thanks very much, I'd never want to be a one-man band; a one-woman one maybe. You're just proving what I said before. And by the way, this is pretty good coming from you. You're the moron who secretly cut down the shotguns and secretly took them with you after we'd all agreed we wouldn't have firearms. You put our lives at risk Homer, by being a one-man band, and you did it in cold blood. I've never done anything like that. You're so sure you're right on every little thing, you don't care what anyone else thinks."
"And I was right, wasn't I? Chris and I'd be dead now if I hadn't had those guns. All of us might be dead. I saved your life Ellie. Hey, I'm a hero."
"Trust you to cash in just because you got a lucky
call. You were so bloody lucky Homer, you haven't even started to figure it out yet. If those blokes had taken their rifles with them when they went into the bush, there's no way you'd have had time to get your precious shotgun out."
"I had it in my hand Ellie. I'm not that slow. I was ready."
"And suppose a patrol had jumped us? Suppose we'd been caught with sawn-off shotguns? We'd have been put against a tree and shot and you'd have five people's blood on your hands."
"But that didn't happen, did it? That proves I was right."
"That doesn't prove anything! That was a fluke!"
"No, because the fact that it didn't happen proves that we'd covered ourselves properly. There's no such thing as a fluke. It's like that golfer said, good players always have the luck. As long as we keep being careful, and smart, we'll keep being lucky. I don't believe in flukes. I figured all this out before I decided to take the guns."
"Homer! You're crazy! Anything could have happened out there! Don't believe in flukes? You don't understand life. It's all flukes. You're acting like you can control everything. You think you're God! Jeez, even in golf, the ball can hit a tree and bounce off into the hole. How do you explain that? Anyway, that's not the point," I said quickly, in case he could explain it. "The point is that you've got to go along with group decisions. You can't ignore us and do what you want. We're all in this together. Don't go calling me a one-man
band. You're not only the band, you're the roadies as well."
"Break it up, guys," Chris said. The others had been reacting to us in their different ways. Robyn had been standing leaning on a mattock, watching and listening with great interest. Fi, who hated conflict, had gone off to our current dunny, fifty metres away in the bush. Lee was reading a book called
Red Shift
and had not even looked up. Chris had been whittling a piece of wood into the shape of a dragon. He'd been doing a lot of stuff like that lately, and was getting really good at it. But he looked upset and angry at the way we were fighting, and a few minutes after he interrupted us he went off to the creek, while the rest of us started getting organised for the expedition.
I was packing in a bit of a rage, throwing
That was like asking a fish if it was a tiny bit wet.
"Ellie, I know you hate it when you don't get your own way on every little thing..."
"Oh yes? And when's the last time I got my own way on anything?"
"Oh oh! You're asking me? Try this morning at breakfast, when you stopped Chris lighting the fire. Try two hours ago, when you wouldn't let Lee open a can of peaches."
"Yeah, and you notice something about both those times? I'm trying to do the right thing by us, by this group! I'm trying to keep us alive! If anyone sees smoke out of here, we're dead. If we pig out on all the food we're in big trouble. I'm not just saying stuff for my own sake, because I like to hear my own voice, you know."
"You ought to listen to others more Ellie. You keep wanting to be a one-man band."
Now I was really mad.
"Thanks very much, I'd never want to be a one-man band; a one-woman one maybe. You're just proving what I said before. And by the way, this is pretty good coming from you. You're the moron who secretly cut down the shotguns and secretly took them with you after we'd all agreed we wouldn't have firearms. You put our lives at risk Homer, by being a one-man band, and you did it in cold blood. I've never done anything like that. You're so sure you're right on every little thing, you don't care what anyone else thinks."
"And I was right, wasn't I? Chris and I'd be dead now if I hadn't had those guns. All of us might be dead. I saved your life Ellie. Hey, I'm a hero."
"Trust you to cash in just because you got a lucky
call. You were so bloody lucky Homer, you haven't even started to figure it out yet. If those blokes had taken their rifles with them when they went into the bush, there's no way you'd have had time to get your precious shotgun out."
"I had it in my hand Ellie. I'm not that slow. I was ready."
"And suppose a patrol had jumped us? Suppose we'd been caught with sawn-off shotguns? We'd have been put against a tree and shot and you'd have five people's blood on your hands."
"But that didn't happen, did it? That proves I was right."
"That doesn't prove anything! That was a fluke!"
"No, because the fact that it didn't happen proves that we'd covered ourselves properly. There's no such thing as a fluke. It's like that golfer said, good players always have the luck. As long as we keep being careful, and smart, we'll keep being lucky. I don't believe in flukes. I figured all this out before I decided to take the guns."
"Homer! You're crazy! Anything could have happened out there! Don't believe in flukes? You don't understand life. It's all flukes. You're acting like you can control everything. You think you're God! Jeez, even in golf, the ball can hit a tree and bounce off into the hole. How do you explain that? Anyway, that's not the point," I said quickly, in case he could explain it. "The point is that you've got to go along with group decisions. You can't ignore us and do what you want. We're all in this together. Don't go calling me a one-man
band. You're not only the band, you're the roadies as well."
"Break it up, guys," Chris said. The others had been reacting to us in their different ways. Robyn had been standing leaning on a mattock, watching and listening with great interest. Fi, who hated conflict, had gone off to our current dunny, fifty metres away in the bush. Lee was reading a book called
Red Shift
and had not even looked up. Chris had been whittling a piece of wood into the shape of a dragon. He'd been doing a lot of stuff like that lately, and was getting really good at it. But he looked upset and angry at the way we were fighting, and a few minutes after he interrupted us he went off to the creek, while the rest of us started getting organised for the expedition.
I was packing in a bit of a rage, throwing
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