least you had good taste,” Holly said. “Because she was the most amazing person I ever knew.”
Chapter Twenty-seven
As soon as we arrived at the hospital, Holly reached into the back seat for her lab coat. Her badge was pinned to the pocket. I dropped her off at the main door and told her I’d find a place to park and meet her in the cafeteria.
Almost an hour later, while I sat alone at a table staring into my black coffee and thinking about Leah’s ALS diagnosis at such a young age, Holly approached and sat down across from me.
“Well?” I said. “Were you able to read the chart?”
She leaned forward, folded her hands on the table and stared at me directly. “Yes.”
“And? Was it Leah’s handwriting?”
Holly’s chest expanded and contracted with a heavy sigh. “No, because there was no record of any psychiatric consultations at all. No notes about any of the interviews you described, and her name was nowhere to be found.”
The air wafted out of my lungs and I sat back. “ Great . Now you must think I’m a total nutcase. Completely delusional.” I watched the people in the lineup for the cash and shook my head in disbelief. “Would the psych notes be somewhere else, like in the psych department?”
“No, the only place they’d be is in your chart. In the records department.”
She continued to watch me intently.
I sat forward and spoke in a hushed tone. “What about the night I woke up?” I realized I was grasping at straws but I had to grasp at something. “I specifically heard Dr. Crosby order the phych consult. He said it to a nurse. Her name was Gayle. I’m sure she would remember that because she seemed shaken that I knew my spleen had been removed.”
Holly raised a finger. “I did see the notation for a consult, but there was a line drawn through it, so someone obviously cancelled it. I’m not sure why. Maybe you could talk to your doctor about that because after the trauma you suffered, you’re definitely at risk for PTSD.”
I leaned back again. “You think I hallucinated everything.”
“I really don’t know,” she gently said. “All I can say for sure is that there was no sign of Leah in your chart. I’m sorry, Josh.”
I rested my elbows on the table, pressed my forehead into the heels of my hands. “She was there. I’m sure of it. It couldn’t have been a dream.”
Holly wrapped a hand around my wrist and lowered my hands to the table. “Did anyone else see her or talk to her? A nurse? Maybe one of your family members who was in the room with you?”
I struggled to remember, then shook my head. “No, it was always just the two of us alone, talking. I asked her to come by and see my sister and mother, and she said she would try, but she never did.”
Now I was beginning to wonder if I really was losing my mind.
But that wouldn’t explain all the things Leah had told me about her brother Riley and how it checked out when Scott looked into it. I hadn’t brought any of that up with Holly yet, but I sure as hell intended to.
But first…
“I need to talk to Dr. Crosby,” I said, rising from my chair. “I want to ask him why he cancelled the psych order.”
“Would you mind if I came with you?” Holly asked.
“You’ve come this far,” I replied. “You might as well stick around for the rest.” I gestured with a hand for her to follow.
Chapter Twenty-eight
“For some reason,” I said to Dr. Crosby when I found him walking briskly down the corridor outside the ICU, “when I got up this morning, I remembered that you had ordered a psychiatric consult when I woke up from my coma. Do you remember that?”
I glanced over at Holly who was waiting discreetly by the elevators.
“Yes,” he replied, and stopped to face me. “But now that you mention it, I don’t recall seeing any notes on that,” he said. “Did someone come and see you?”
“No,” I answered. “I thought maybe you’d cancelled it.”
He stared at me for a moment,
Chapter Twenty-seven
As soon as we arrived at the hospital, Holly reached into the back seat for her lab coat. Her badge was pinned to the pocket. I dropped her off at the main door and told her I’d find a place to park and meet her in the cafeteria.
Almost an hour later, while I sat alone at a table staring into my black coffee and thinking about Leah’s ALS diagnosis at such a young age, Holly approached and sat down across from me.
“Well?” I said. “Were you able to read the chart?”
She leaned forward, folded her hands on the table and stared at me directly. “Yes.”
“And? Was it Leah’s handwriting?”
Holly’s chest expanded and contracted with a heavy sigh. “No, because there was no record of any psychiatric consultations at all. No notes about any of the interviews you described, and her name was nowhere to be found.”
The air wafted out of my lungs and I sat back. “ Great . Now you must think I’m a total nutcase. Completely delusional.” I watched the people in the lineup for the cash and shook my head in disbelief. “Would the psych notes be somewhere else, like in the psych department?”
“No, the only place they’d be is in your chart. In the records department.”
She continued to watch me intently.
I sat forward and spoke in a hushed tone. “What about the night I woke up?” I realized I was grasping at straws but I had to grasp at something. “I specifically heard Dr. Crosby order the phych consult. He said it to a nurse. Her name was Gayle. I’m sure she would remember that because she seemed shaken that I knew my spleen had been removed.”
Holly raised a finger. “I did see the notation for a consult, but there was a line drawn through it, so someone obviously cancelled it. I’m not sure why. Maybe you could talk to your doctor about that because after the trauma you suffered, you’re definitely at risk for PTSD.”
I leaned back again. “You think I hallucinated everything.”
“I really don’t know,” she gently said. “All I can say for sure is that there was no sign of Leah in your chart. I’m sorry, Josh.”
I rested my elbows on the table, pressed my forehead into the heels of my hands. “She was there. I’m sure of it. It couldn’t have been a dream.”
Holly wrapped a hand around my wrist and lowered my hands to the table. “Did anyone else see her or talk to her? A nurse? Maybe one of your family members who was in the room with you?”
I struggled to remember, then shook my head. “No, it was always just the two of us alone, talking. I asked her to come by and see my sister and mother, and she said she would try, but she never did.”
Now I was beginning to wonder if I really was losing my mind.
But that wouldn’t explain all the things Leah had told me about her brother Riley and how it checked out when Scott looked into it. I hadn’t brought any of that up with Holly yet, but I sure as hell intended to.
But first…
“I need to talk to Dr. Crosby,” I said, rising from my chair. “I want to ask him why he cancelled the psych order.”
“Would you mind if I came with you?” Holly asked.
“You’ve come this far,” I replied. “You might as well stick around for the rest.” I gestured with a hand for her to follow.
Chapter Twenty-eight
“For some reason,” I said to Dr. Crosby when I found him walking briskly down the corridor outside the ICU, “when I got up this morning, I remembered that you had ordered a psychiatric consult when I woke up from my coma. Do you remember that?”
I glanced over at Holly who was waiting discreetly by the elevators.
“Yes,” he replied, and stopped to face me. “But now that you mention it, I don’t recall seeing any notes on that,” he said. “Did someone come and see you?”
“No,” I answered. “I thought maybe you’d cancelled it.”
He stared at me for a moment,
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