pyjama and Bata rubber flip-flops, and he was so happy. I saw his suitcase later. My God, so many Ludhiana Mill woollies, strips of Saridon, Vicks inhaler, cough drops, Johnson’s turmeric bandaid, Madhiwala ointment, clove oil for toothache, Amrutanjan pain balm, Jeevdaya Netraprabha for sparkling eyes, safety pins and a bandage, even that anti-flatulence stuff, you know, Havabaan Harde. I just couldn’t believe it. Was he preparing to go into an English jungle, or what? And when he was leaving to go back to Delhi, he gave me five packets of rose incense sticks. They are so strong, I get an instant headache.’
‘Then you should have kept his Amrutanjan pain balm also,
na
,’ advised Swarnakumari.
‘What to do? I usually get very boring gifts from India,’ shrugged Heera.
‘Like oil-shedding mango pickle,’ contributed Durga moodily.
‘Or twenty sandalwood paper cutters. I tell you, I have some strange guests in my house, and where they all come from, God only knows! I once came home to find strangers waiting outside my front door. He was a software consultant from Birmingham and his parents had just arrived from Delhi. They knew a friend of mine in Hyderabad, that’s how they’d heard of me. They made themselves comfortable, drank my tea, ate my biscuits, but his ma was so tired, he said, jetlag continuing from two days ago, could she lie down somewhere for a few minutes, so I showed her to the guest room. Then he said, Ma and Baba must be so hungry, not used to this cold, could I suggest some place they could eat, but Ma was a pure vegetarian and already tired of eating bread. After her nap, Ma suddenly sprang up full of energy like a toddler with a dry nappy, and got busy in my kitchen, helping me cook rice and
dal
. Then the son announced he was on a carbohydrate-free meat diet to control his diabetes without medicine, did I have any lamb or chicken, and look how Ma is shivering, how is she going to make it back to Birmingham, it is already so dark, and she had wanted to see Cambridge. As soon as he said that, his mother immediately went all floppy. So they stayed the night. On top of that, I had to lend the whole family their nightclothes. The son is a little taller than Bob, and he complained, “Oh look, these pyjamas of your husband are too short for me.”
Arre
, was he waiting for designer Burberry made to his size, or what? I told him, “As long as Bob’s pyjamas cover your bits, that’s all that should matter.” Then he asked if I had thought ofbreakfast, because Ma liked apple juice, orange juice was too sharp for her teeth, and Baba liked white bread for toast, and did I have enough milk? Ma awoke at five and started moving around noisily, so I had to get up too. She asked me when I went downstairs,
bete
, how do you boil the water here, I want to make chai, and can Baba do his yoga asanas on your carpet – no hurry, whenever you are ready. Can you believe this behaviour? And no Diwali card, no thank you letter from these strangers afterwards,’ concluded Heera indignantly as the shop bell tinkled.
A toddler on a leash dragged his mother towards a Lego helicopter that he instantly dismantled while she looked apologetic. An expensively dressed woman entered a moment later with a tiny shaggy dog clinging to her bosom.
‘Where’s Diana?’ she demanded sharply.
‘Mrs Wellington-Smythe is not here, she has gone riding,’ answered Heera. ‘I’m sorry, but no pets are allowed in the shop.’
‘Don’t be ridiculous. Phoebe wouldn’t hurt a flea or a fly. She stays right here with me, and you may tell Diana I said so,’ the visitor retorted firmly. ‘Well, I haven’t driven all the way from Latham Road for nothing . I’ll give her a ring, but if she isn’t going to show up, I’d better look round the shop myself.’
The woman advanced, tenderly stroking the pet with her red nails. Swarnakumari froze as she met the creature’s penetrating eyes. Guru Ma’s prayer book had
‘Then you should have kept his Amrutanjan pain balm also,
na
,’ advised Swarnakumari.
‘What to do? I usually get very boring gifts from India,’ shrugged Heera.
‘Like oil-shedding mango pickle,’ contributed Durga moodily.
‘Or twenty sandalwood paper cutters. I tell you, I have some strange guests in my house, and where they all come from, God only knows! I once came home to find strangers waiting outside my front door. He was a software consultant from Birmingham and his parents had just arrived from Delhi. They knew a friend of mine in Hyderabad, that’s how they’d heard of me. They made themselves comfortable, drank my tea, ate my biscuits, but his ma was so tired, he said, jetlag continuing from two days ago, could she lie down somewhere for a few minutes, so I showed her to the guest room. Then he said, Ma and Baba must be so hungry, not used to this cold, could I suggest some place they could eat, but Ma was a pure vegetarian and already tired of eating bread. After her nap, Ma suddenly sprang up full of energy like a toddler with a dry nappy, and got busy in my kitchen, helping me cook rice and
dal
. Then the son announced he was on a carbohydrate-free meat diet to control his diabetes without medicine, did I have any lamb or chicken, and look how Ma is shivering, how is she going to make it back to Birmingham, it is already so dark, and she had wanted to see Cambridge. As soon as he said that, his mother immediately went all floppy. So they stayed the night. On top of that, I had to lend the whole family their nightclothes. The son is a little taller than Bob, and he complained, “Oh look, these pyjamas of your husband are too short for me.”
Arre
, was he waiting for designer Burberry made to his size, or what? I told him, “As long as Bob’s pyjamas cover your bits, that’s all that should matter.” Then he asked if I had thought ofbreakfast, because Ma liked apple juice, orange juice was too sharp for her teeth, and Baba liked white bread for toast, and did I have enough milk? Ma awoke at five and started moving around noisily, so I had to get up too. She asked me when I went downstairs,
bete
, how do you boil the water here, I want to make chai, and can Baba do his yoga asanas on your carpet – no hurry, whenever you are ready. Can you believe this behaviour? And no Diwali card, no thank you letter from these strangers afterwards,’ concluded Heera indignantly as the shop bell tinkled.
A toddler on a leash dragged his mother towards a Lego helicopter that he instantly dismantled while she looked apologetic. An expensively dressed woman entered a moment later with a tiny shaggy dog clinging to her bosom.
‘Where’s Diana?’ she demanded sharply.
‘Mrs Wellington-Smythe is not here, she has gone riding,’ answered Heera. ‘I’m sorry, but no pets are allowed in the shop.’
‘Don’t be ridiculous. Phoebe wouldn’t hurt a flea or a fly. She stays right here with me, and you may tell Diana I said so,’ the visitor retorted firmly. ‘Well, I haven’t driven all the way from Latham Road for nothing . I’ll give her a ring, but if she isn’t going to show up, I’d better look round the shop myself.’
The woman advanced, tenderly stroking the pet with her red nails. Swarnakumari froze as she met the creature’s penetrating eyes. Guru Ma’s prayer book had
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