But that same day he back to him surly self, cussing Homer over the ball plans and wondering why he making a nigger plan his ball and not even once looking in Lilith direction. She bite her bottom lip and swing her hip and walk but when Lilith look up he not looking. That make her want to cease but it also make her want to go on. If only she could say something un-niggerlike. Uncommon. Like a lady of good breeding and learning. A woman who have quality that a dirty hussy like Circe never have. Something Homer would know if her bosom was of any use to a man.
Lilith tell herself that she not no foolish nigger. She know what being the massa favourite mean in real speak. She know that a nigger who not uncommon should think and plot. But she also see him hair blaze afire and she remember a white boy on a page tear from a book and everything come together and make her mind burn. Lilith hoping every day that just once he recognise her as the slave who make him tea whichever morning he come in from carousing. One afternoon Massa Humphrey make a trip to the kitchen huffing and puffing. Everything stop. Right behind him was Robert Quinn eating a banana.
—Goddamn if I won’t see some British decency in this house, even if it’s only tea at four, Massa Humphrey say.
—Then I’s best be about fixing it, massa, Homer say.
—No, let her do it. The girl in the cellar. Her teas are particularly robust, if I remember. Not so, Quinn?
—Robust indeed, Robert Quinn say.
Lilith didn’t look at the face she know Homer giving her.
8
The NEXT MORNING, LILITH WAS In The CELLAR BRUSHING cobweb from a silver tray. The kitchen still dark as if no sun was coming. She look at herself and know that she never come ’cross no other woman with her colour eye save for Gorgon and Hippolyta, and they both ugly. She start to believe that Jack Wilkins really be her daddy and the road set before her was going to wind a different way than most nigger. That make her walk straighter. Three time she ask Homer ’bout her real mother and three time Homer go quiet. She wonder if her mother be like her, but without the green eye, of course. She wonder if she was short or tall or fat, or if she get kilt ’cause her spirit wouldn’t dim like lamp. All she learn from Homer is that her mama dead the same time she born and that make Lilith feel bad. Mayhaps she was Jack Wilkins’ chère amie and he did hold her soft while she dead.
Lilith have more question inside her heart, a dozen question all beginning with why, that she don’t ask nobody. Plus she too ’fraid to ask Jack Wilkins and word was that him mind not be the same since he lose the overseer work. The only other soul who might know a thing or two be Tantalus the mad nigger, who was part of this arrangement too. She try to arrange her thinking. Jack Wilkins fuck her mother, her mother get heavy with niggerkin and dead giving birth. Jack Wilkins pass the baby on to Circe for mothering and put her to live with Tantalus for fathering. That don’t make no sense and Lilith cuss. From down in the cellar Lilith hear something smash from upstairs, most likely the mistress’ room. She smashing her Wedgwood china again. Mayhaps old age drive everybody mad at Montpelier. Mayhaps madness be the only thing that afflict white man and nigger alike.
—Lilith, potato waiting on you, Homer shout from the kitchen.
—Hoity-toity nigger deh ’pon the evening shift, say Andromeda. Lilith don’t have nothing to say. Even Homer did turn around, waiting for Lilith smart mouth. But Lilith go over to her corner and sit down and peel potato with her back to everybody. That be near enough to throw the kitchen into ’ruption. Lilith smart mouth for all her rudeness did now become part of the house nigger morning rhythm and slave need a rhythm to carry through the day.
—Jesus Christ, is who break wind in here? Pallas say and look straight at Chiron.
—Me can’t even break egg, he say.
—Smell like you just
Lilith tell herself that she not no foolish nigger. She know what being the massa favourite mean in real speak. She know that a nigger who not uncommon should think and plot. But she also see him hair blaze afire and she remember a white boy on a page tear from a book and everything come together and make her mind burn. Lilith hoping every day that just once he recognise her as the slave who make him tea whichever morning he come in from carousing. One afternoon Massa Humphrey make a trip to the kitchen huffing and puffing. Everything stop. Right behind him was Robert Quinn eating a banana.
—Goddamn if I won’t see some British decency in this house, even if it’s only tea at four, Massa Humphrey say.
—Then I’s best be about fixing it, massa, Homer say.
—No, let her do it. The girl in the cellar. Her teas are particularly robust, if I remember. Not so, Quinn?
—Robust indeed, Robert Quinn say.
Lilith didn’t look at the face she know Homer giving her.
8
The NEXT MORNING, LILITH WAS In The CELLAR BRUSHING cobweb from a silver tray. The kitchen still dark as if no sun was coming. She look at herself and know that she never come ’cross no other woman with her colour eye save for Gorgon and Hippolyta, and they both ugly. She start to believe that Jack Wilkins really be her daddy and the road set before her was going to wind a different way than most nigger. That make her walk straighter. Three time she ask Homer ’bout her real mother and three time Homer go quiet. She wonder if her mother be like her, but without the green eye, of course. She wonder if she was short or tall or fat, or if she get kilt ’cause her spirit wouldn’t dim like lamp. All she learn from Homer is that her mama dead the same time she born and that make Lilith feel bad. Mayhaps she was Jack Wilkins’ chère amie and he did hold her soft while she dead.
Lilith have more question inside her heart, a dozen question all beginning with why, that she don’t ask nobody. Plus she too ’fraid to ask Jack Wilkins and word was that him mind not be the same since he lose the overseer work. The only other soul who might know a thing or two be Tantalus the mad nigger, who was part of this arrangement too. She try to arrange her thinking. Jack Wilkins fuck her mother, her mother get heavy with niggerkin and dead giving birth. Jack Wilkins pass the baby on to Circe for mothering and put her to live with Tantalus for fathering. That don’t make no sense and Lilith cuss. From down in the cellar Lilith hear something smash from upstairs, most likely the mistress’ room. She smashing her Wedgwood china again. Mayhaps old age drive everybody mad at Montpelier. Mayhaps madness be the only thing that afflict white man and nigger alike.
—Lilith, potato waiting on you, Homer shout from the kitchen.
—Hoity-toity nigger deh ’pon the evening shift, say Andromeda. Lilith don’t have nothing to say. Even Homer did turn around, waiting for Lilith smart mouth. But Lilith go over to her corner and sit down and peel potato with her back to everybody. That be near enough to throw the kitchen into ’ruption. Lilith smart mouth for all her rudeness did now become part of the house nigger morning rhythm and slave need a rhythm to carry through the day.
—Jesus Christ, is who break wind in here? Pallas say and look straight at Chiron.
—Me can’t even break egg, he say.
—Smell like you just
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