live when fevers struck and bombs fell, hiring and firing nannies, nursery maids, and cooks. She had done all that she was expected to do as an Edwardian mother. Yet, if she refused to leave them with Euan, he could refuse the divorce. And, as he had not in fact deserted her, Idina would have been extremely unlikely to win a divorce from him. An unhappy mother was not a good mother. Idina herself had grown up with only one preoccupied parent and Rowie, her divinity of a governess. It had seemed, happily, to be quite enough. Her mother was still at Old Lodge, as was Rowie, to keep an eye on things. And, now that the war was over, they would have Euan. When he was there he was very good with them. Africa, on the otherhand, was not a place for children. As painful as it might be, giving her boys to Euan clearly seemed the best thing for them.
But Euan didn’t just want the children to stay with him. He didn’t want any coming and going. What they needed was stability. If Idina insisted upon leaving with Gordon, she would have to go and never return. She couldn’t hop in and out of their lives on a whim.
The alternative to all this was to find a way to make their marriage work again.
Emotions deepen late at night. And it was “far into the night” by now.
Idina softened into indecision.
Their conversation was not over. Idina had been certain but now, seeing Euan again, she was not so sure. She had fallen in love with Charles and therefore believed she ought to marry him. But she still loved Euan too. 10
The sky outside was late-autumn pitch.
It was not an hour to make promises that might be hard to keep.
IDINA SPENT THE NEXT DAY with her friend Eva. The moment Euan had left to grip his mother’s shoulders while she wrung her hands with all the agony of a soothsayer ignored at the prospect of her adored son being tarnished with a divorce, Idina had called Eva, who had come round. The two women had talked all morning. Then, when Euan returned, they went out to lunch—Euan gave them a lift—and talked some more.
That night, when Euan returned from another pre-wedding dinner followed by a show with Avie, Idina was waiting for him again. “Another talk to Dina lasting two and a half hours.”
Even though Idina had conducted her affair with Charles so publicly, as good as living with the man, Euan was prepared to have her back on a sole condition—that she never saw Gordon again. If she did, he would divorce her and she would never see the children.
It was a big promise to ask Idina to make. Euan gave her two weeks to decide.
The next morning Euan went to his lawyers, Williams and James, “eliciting a great deal of information about the general position.” He could start divorce proceedings against Idina in Scotland, as far as possible from the Fleet Street press. A single hearing, a couple of witnesses, was enough.
He then went shopping, eventually returning to Connaught Place to talk to Idina for half an hour before a lunch party at Dorchester House.Behaving as though he thought his threats might work and Idina would be coming back to him, he returned “home at three and picked up Dina and drove her to Victoria in the little car,” her own car, gas bag still teetering on top. He pulled up outside and called a porter for her bags.
They stood facing each other, the train whistles filling the space between them. The station was heaving, every step across the concourse blocked by muted tweed, worn leather and khaki still bobbing around. The air stank. Coal, grease, shoe polish, unfinished sandwiches, half-digested meat pies, and human sweat were being steamed up to the top of the high glass arches, where they condensed against the freezing air outside and fell back in erratic, noxious droplets.
They said good-bye. Idina swung on her heels and tripped off in the direction of the Brighton train.
Through the smoke, Euan could see Rosita Forbes waiting on the platform.
Chapter 12
I dina’s two weeks to decide
But Euan didn’t just want the children to stay with him. He didn’t want any coming and going. What they needed was stability. If Idina insisted upon leaving with Gordon, she would have to go and never return. She couldn’t hop in and out of their lives on a whim.
The alternative to all this was to find a way to make their marriage work again.
Emotions deepen late at night. And it was “far into the night” by now.
Idina softened into indecision.
Their conversation was not over. Idina had been certain but now, seeing Euan again, she was not so sure. She had fallen in love with Charles and therefore believed she ought to marry him. But she still loved Euan too. 10
The sky outside was late-autumn pitch.
It was not an hour to make promises that might be hard to keep.
IDINA SPENT THE NEXT DAY with her friend Eva. The moment Euan had left to grip his mother’s shoulders while she wrung her hands with all the agony of a soothsayer ignored at the prospect of her adored son being tarnished with a divorce, Idina had called Eva, who had come round. The two women had talked all morning. Then, when Euan returned, they went out to lunch—Euan gave them a lift—and talked some more.
That night, when Euan returned from another pre-wedding dinner followed by a show with Avie, Idina was waiting for him again. “Another talk to Dina lasting two and a half hours.”
Even though Idina had conducted her affair with Charles so publicly, as good as living with the man, Euan was prepared to have her back on a sole condition—that she never saw Gordon again. If she did, he would divorce her and she would never see the children.
It was a big promise to ask Idina to make. Euan gave her two weeks to decide.
The next morning Euan went to his lawyers, Williams and James, “eliciting a great deal of information about the general position.” He could start divorce proceedings against Idina in Scotland, as far as possible from the Fleet Street press. A single hearing, a couple of witnesses, was enough.
He then went shopping, eventually returning to Connaught Place to talk to Idina for half an hour before a lunch party at Dorchester House.Behaving as though he thought his threats might work and Idina would be coming back to him, he returned “home at three and picked up Dina and drove her to Victoria in the little car,” her own car, gas bag still teetering on top. He pulled up outside and called a porter for her bags.
They stood facing each other, the train whistles filling the space between them. The station was heaving, every step across the concourse blocked by muted tweed, worn leather and khaki still bobbing around. The air stank. Coal, grease, shoe polish, unfinished sandwiches, half-digested meat pies, and human sweat were being steamed up to the top of the high glass arches, where they condensed against the freezing air outside and fell back in erratic, noxious droplets.
They said good-bye. Idina swung on her heels and tripped off in the direction of the Brighton train.
Through the smoke, Euan could see Rosita Forbes waiting on the platform.
Chapter 12
I dina’s two weeks to decide
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