her heart was thumping and she held her breath silently praying he wouldn’t come back in and say more horrible things. She let out a huge sigh of relief when she heard the front door close. Picking up the bottle of wine she walked to the bay window, hid behind the full drapes and watched him climb into his car, look up at the house then slowly pull away from the kerb.
*
In the kitchen Helen poured a second glass of wine, feeling stunned by what had just happened in the last hour of her life. He was gone, and finally and inextricably she was now on her own. This was what she had imagined in the past after he’d confessed to an affair, but she’d always been able to manage the situation around Rachel and somehow they’d got through the first few weeks of distress by carrying on with normal everyday life.
It was different now because the house was empty and for once she could do exactly as she pleased. She wandered back into the lounge and slumped down on the settee feeling drained and lifeless – surely, she should be in floods of tears at the end of her marriage? Maybe they’d come later, she thought, kicking off her black brogues, laying her head back on the settee and closing her eyes.
The bleep on her mobile phone an hour later woke her and she saw a text message from her sister, Karen. When she rang her back with the news about Rob, it took ten minutes of reassurance to stop Karen from running around to console her.
‘But I don’t want retaliation or revenge, Karen,’ she explained. ‘And I certainly don’t want to be a member of The First Wives Club.’ She could tell by Karen’s silence that she hadn’t understood. ‘You know, the film with Bette Midler and Goldie Hawn when they get revenge on their husbands for running off with younger women.’
She heard Karen sigh heavily, ‘Right. But you can’t let him just walk away scot-free.’ she exploded. ‘I wish I could get my hands on him I could bloody kill him for hurting you like this…’
Helen thought carefully before she replied, ‘Funnily enough, I don’t feel hurt. If anything, at the moment, I just feel relieved. And, of course, sad thinking of the years I’ve wasted trying to keep the family together. But that was for my Rachel who is more than worth it.’
Karen tutted. ‘I know she is, honey. But, Christ, twenty-three years old? What’s got into him? Maybe he’s having one of those midlife crises?’ she asked.
‘Whatever he is having I’m not interested any more. And although my mind is a little hazy with tiredness and wine at the moment, all I know is that I’m not going to waste another second of my energy on him,’ she said.
With promises of calling to see her the next day Helen ended the call, turned off all the downstairs lights, double locked the doors and headed upstairs to soak in the bath before rolling into bed and falling into a deep sleep.
Chapter Two
The seven o’clock alarm the following morning was a rude awakening and she wished with all her heart that it was Saturday and she could take the day at a more leisurely pace. She felt exhausted from the emotional upheaval of the night before and pulling on her dressing gown she plodded downstairs to make strong coffee.
While she stood at the kitchen sink waiting for the kettle to boil she stared down at her left hand, rolled her wedding ring around her finger and thought of their wedding ceremony. Then she remembered Rob’s angry words, how he couldn’t stand her any more, and then thought of him waking up next to young Stephanie this morning. Slowly but deliberately she slid the ring from her finger and dropped it into a plant pot on the kitchen window sill. The ring was like him now, she decided – it meant absolutely nothing to her.
*
As Helen pulled into the factory car park on the outskirts of Acton she waved to a couple of staff from the production office and parked outside the new extension block situated across from the main factory area.
*
In the kitchen Helen poured a second glass of wine, feeling stunned by what had just happened in the last hour of her life. He was gone, and finally and inextricably she was now on her own. This was what she had imagined in the past after he’d confessed to an affair, but she’d always been able to manage the situation around Rachel and somehow they’d got through the first few weeks of distress by carrying on with normal everyday life.
It was different now because the house was empty and for once she could do exactly as she pleased. She wandered back into the lounge and slumped down on the settee feeling drained and lifeless – surely, she should be in floods of tears at the end of her marriage? Maybe they’d come later, she thought, kicking off her black brogues, laying her head back on the settee and closing her eyes.
The bleep on her mobile phone an hour later woke her and she saw a text message from her sister, Karen. When she rang her back with the news about Rob, it took ten minutes of reassurance to stop Karen from running around to console her.
‘But I don’t want retaliation or revenge, Karen,’ she explained. ‘And I certainly don’t want to be a member of The First Wives Club.’ She could tell by Karen’s silence that she hadn’t understood. ‘You know, the film with Bette Midler and Goldie Hawn when they get revenge on their husbands for running off with younger women.’
She heard Karen sigh heavily, ‘Right. But you can’t let him just walk away scot-free.’ she exploded. ‘I wish I could get my hands on him I could bloody kill him for hurting you like this…’
Helen thought carefully before she replied, ‘Funnily enough, I don’t feel hurt. If anything, at the moment, I just feel relieved. And, of course, sad thinking of the years I’ve wasted trying to keep the family together. But that was for my Rachel who is more than worth it.’
Karen tutted. ‘I know she is, honey. But, Christ, twenty-three years old? What’s got into him? Maybe he’s having one of those midlife crises?’ she asked.
‘Whatever he is having I’m not interested any more. And although my mind is a little hazy with tiredness and wine at the moment, all I know is that I’m not going to waste another second of my energy on him,’ she said.
With promises of calling to see her the next day Helen ended the call, turned off all the downstairs lights, double locked the doors and headed upstairs to soak in the bath before rolling into bed and falling into a deep sleep.
Chapter Two
The seven o’clock alarm the following morning was a rude awakening and she wished with all her heart that it was Saturday and she could take the day at a more leisurely pace. She felt exhausted from the emotional upheaval of the night before and pulling on her dressing gown she plodded downstairs to make strong coffee.
While she stood at the kitchen sink waiting for the kettle to boil she stared down at her left hand, rolled her wedding ring around her finger and thought of their wedding ceremony. Then she remembered Rob’s angry words, how he couldn’t stand her any more, and then thought of him waking up next to young Stephanie this morning. Slowly but deliberately she slid the ring from her finger and dropped it into a plant pot on the kitchen window sill. The ring was like him now, she decided – it meant absolutely nothing to her.
*
As Helen pulled into the factory car park on the outskirts of Acton she waved to a couple of staff from the production office and parked outside the new extension block situated across from the main factory area.
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