Tempting Fate by Jane Green Page B

have?’ His voice is a whisper of desire and Gabby closes her eyes, her whole body on fire, knowing this is too much, this is more than she can handle. His hand is on her knee, and it is as if it is burning through her skin. She can feel him in every bone, every fibre, every tendon of her body, and it is so delicious, so intoxicating, she wants to just sit like this for ever, with his breath brushing her ear, his hand on her leg.
    But she is married. To a wonderful man. The thought of Elliott, of his face if he could see them, of his devastation if she was unfaithful, if he ever found out, is sobering.
    She opens her eyes to see Matt, his face inches from hers. A few seconds go by as they stare at each other, before Gabby shakes her head.
    ‘Matt, I … I can’t do this. I’m not the sort of woman …’ She stops. She doesn’t know how to say this. ‘I’m married. This feels like too much. I’m sorry.’
    ‘It’s fine.’ He jumps back, his face filled with apology.‘I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable. I’m sorry. It’s my fault.’
    ‘Oh, Matt. If I was ten years younger, and single …’ Her voice tails off.
    ‘You’re perfect exactly as you are,’ he says. ‘You are. Truly.’ He gives a wry smile. ‘It’s my bad luck that when I’ve found the perfect woman, she’s unavailable.’
    ‘We can still be friends,’ Gabby says.
    ‘Absolutely,’ Matt says. ‘Friends.’
    He calls Gabby a cab while she mentally kicks herself. She did the right thing, of course she did the right thing, but he is slightly distant now. The playful flirtatiousness, the dangerous edge of earlier has gone, and Gabby would do anything,
anything
, to get it back.
    When the cab arrives and Matt has put his arms round her in a perfunctory hug, Gabby steps back, then moves forward again, taking his face gently in her hands. She opens her lips as she kisses him slowly, softly, moving back when she feels his tongue. No tongues. Just … teasing. She needs to keep him wanting her. She needs to continue feeling as beautiful as he has made her feel, and if that requires a tiny bit of teasing, so be it.
    This time she pulls back to see a smile of delight on his face.
    ‘Friends?’ he whispers.
    ‘Friends,’ she nods, climbing into the cab, her heart threatening to pound right out of her chest.
    The girls are fast asleep when she walks in. Olivia sleeps in the dark, her face as soft and peaceful as when she was a baby. Gabby brushes her hair off her face and kisses her on the forehead, then the cheek, then the cheek again. When the girls are asleep, at their most vulnerable, not fighting, not looking at her with disdain, not being the vocal, confident children they are, she is reminded of their innocence and she feels herself falling in love with them all over again, every night.
    Alanna’s light is on, her iTouch still clutched in her hand. Gabby hesitates, then prises it out and clicks the screen on. Sometime in the last six weeks Alanna set up an Instagram account, and Gabby, not allowed to look under normal circumstances, could perhaps find out more about what’s going on.
    But the iTouch is now password-protected, and nothing Gabby can think of will work. With a sigh, and after several kisses on the forehead and cheek of her younger daughter, she turns off the light and moves quietly down the hallway to her own bedroom.
    The television is on when she walks in, Elliott illuminated by the bluish light of
Homeland
. His mouth is open as he snores gently, the covers mussed up around his legs, his T-shirt ridden up to expose the rounded belly she has always loved so much.
    And suddenly Gabby feels like crying. The familiarity, the comfort in seeing Elliott, the relief at having come so close to doing something so terrible – and shedid come close, as close as she has ever come – all makes her eyes prick with tears.
    Kicking off her boots she snuggles into Elliott’s side, wanting to smell him, feel him, wanting the