Tarnished by Julia Crouch Page B

though?’
    Raymond’s lips fell into a scowl and he flared his nostrils.
    ‘I can’t have anything to do with either of them. It’s all in the past. This is my life now. And Paulie – and Caroline – will never, ever, meet them. Never. You hear?’
    Peg gasped at the fire behind Raymond’s words. It was like he was spitting another lump of gristle out of his throat.
    ‘You hear me?’ he went on, his eyes cast down now to the floor, his voice trembling. ‘So don’t waste your breath.’
    ‘But—’
    ‘That’s all I’m saying about it,’ Raymond said. He took up his knife and fork and sawed into the remaining chunk of flesh on his plate. ‘You hear me?’
    ‘Are you sure I can’t tempt you with some more salad?’ Caroline asked, smiling her smile as if nothing had happened.

Eleven
    After a strained dessert of chocolate mousse, Raymond said he had a few phone calls to attend to. Peg was led by Caroline back into the living room, where she took a seat on one of the squashy sofas and contemplated just how badly her mission had failed. She felt like just getting up and walking out, but she couldn’t find the energy to do so.
    ‘Raymond’s very hands-on with the business,’ Caroline said as she settled down next to Peg in front of the living-room fire. A younger woman in a black blouse and skirt – a nanny, perhaps – appeared at the door with Paulie so he could kiss his mother goodnight.
    ‘The doctor said he should take it more easier,’ Caroline said as the little boy was led away, a red smudge of lipstick on his cheek. ‘But there’s no stopping him.’
    ‘Doctor?’ Peg said.
    ‘He had a triple bypass a year or so back. I thought he was having another heart attack back there!’ Caroline giggled.
    Nan should have known about that , Peg thought as she stared into the flames, watching them curl round the olivewood logs like witches’ fingers.
    ‘You don’t talk much, do you?’ Caroline said, pouring herself a second brandy and tucking her legs up underneath her. ‘Just like him.’ She stretched her arm along the back of the sofa and laid a claw-nailed hand on Peg’s shoulder. ‘Like I said, he’s wanted to get in touch with you for ages. “Go on, then,” I said to him whenever he mentioned it, but it was “never the right time”, or “she won’t want to know”.’
    Peg wondered if this was the truth, or if Caroline was just telling her what she thought she wanted to hear – keeping her sweet because she knew how furious she must be feeling.
    Caroline smiled to herself and looked out at the pool, which glowed in the chilly night with pink underwater lights. ‘“Silly old Goosey,” I said to him. I call him Goosey sometimes. “Of course she’ll want to know. You’re her dad. Of course she’ll want to hear from you.” And wasn’t I right? Here you are. Just like that!’ She snapped her fingers.
    Peg looked at the woman she supposed she should refer to as her stepmother and wondered if they even came from the same species.
    ‘You mustn’t judge him too harshly,’ Caroline said.
    Why the hell not? Peg felt her inner Loz urging her to say.
    ‘His mother and sister said it was best for you, darling.’ Caroline stroked Peg’s shoulder, her pearly pink nails rasping on the material of her smock. Peg fought the urge to bat her hand away. ‘When he got out, you were so settled and happy. You said so yourself at dinner – you were happy, you said.’
    ‘Got out?’ Peg said, turning to face her, so that she could no longer reach her shoulder.
    ‘Of the nick,’ Caroline said. Then, seeing Peg’s reaction, her face fell, as if the stitches holding it in its happy position had been scissored. ‘Oh shit,’ she said. ‘You don’t bloody know, do you?’
    Peg shook her head slowly. She wished she hadn’t had that third glass of wine at dinner. She wasn’t used to drinking and her head now felt like it was going to explode. She was really worried that she might end up