say I was too cute to fuck'?"
"Yeah, that works. Don't just go hide and then I gotta come find you. Or find out you're gone, like you tried to do at the hotel. I don't like that at all."
"I'm sorry. I don't think I realized I was doing it that much."
I lift my hand and push her long hair away from her face so I can see her better. "I'm a little worried that if I'm gone on tour, and you get some kind of bug up your ass about something, you're either gonna move out of the house while I'm gone, or not answer the phone when I call…things like that. That will seriously drive me crazy. I'd rather you just confronted me with whatever's bothering you."
She leans her forehead against my chest for a moment and then looks up again. "Okay, you're right. I'll try not to do it. I definitely won't move out—I can promise you that. This is just hard, ya know? It hurts hearing that you don't like me in that way. That's not exactly what I was hoping for in a husband."
"Do you think I liked hearing that you don't like the way I look? I have feelings too. I may joke and be sarcastic a lot, but I still was hoping that whoever I ended up with wouldn't be repulsed by me."
Her hands clutch the scarf that's still draped around my neck. "I'm sorry." Her voice is soft, almost inaudible. "And I'm not repulsed by you."
"You could prove it by giving me a kiss. Maybe." I move my hand to her chin and gently lift her head up. "You might actually like it."
"Close your eyes," she says. "I can't do it if you're looking at me like that."
"Are you twelve? Stop stalling and put your lips on me like you own me."
I close my eyes and wait. A few seconds go by and I feel her go up on her tiptoes. Her lips touch mine quickly, then they're gone.
My eyes fly open. "What the hell was that?"
"A kiss."
I laugh in her face. "That was not a kiss."
"Yeah, it was. Don't laugh at me."
" That was supposed to prove to me that you're not repulsed by me? If anything that proves you are."
"Talon, I am not. Not at all. I'm just kinda…shy, I guess. And not used to kissing on demand." Her eyes lower again, like she's afraid to make eye contact with me for too long.
And then it hits me. It's not that she's not attracted to me. It’s that she's too attracted to me and it's freaking her out. She's a jittery, nervous mess around me.
This changes everything.
This, I can have even more fun with.
----
" S o , what do you want to do now?" I ask her as we're strolling back to the guesthouse after having dinner with Gram.
"Hmmm…" She ponders. "Anything?"
"Sure. If you wanna go someplace, I'll take you."
"Do you promise not to laugh at me?"
"No, I'll probably laugh at you, but I'll still do whatever you want to do."
"Fair enough. I want to cuddle on the couch, watch a movie, and eat popcorn."
I stop walking. " That's what you want to do?"
Shrugging a little, she grabs my hand and tugs me to keep walking. "Yeah. It's actually something I've been wanting to do for a long time, but it sucks to watch movies alone."
"Ya know what? That's something I haven’t done since I was in high school. So you're on."
"Are you kidding me?"
I open the front door of the guesthouse and let her go in before me. "Nope, I can honestly say I haven't hung out on the couch and watched a movie with a chick since I was about sixteen."
"Wow. What did you do with your exes then?"
The past ten years flash through my brain, and none of it seems like something I should share with my new wife if I plan to keep her. "You really don't want to hear all that, babe."
"Yeah, no. I don't want to hear gory details, but I'm really curious. How did you spend your time?"
I head into the kitchen to see if I can find some microwaveable popcorn. Gram keeps this place pretty stocked since there is usually someone staying here several days per month. "Um…drink, sometimes some recreational drugs, went to some clubs, and sex. That's about it."
She opens a cabinet and pulls out a box. "Look!
"Yeah, that works. Don't just go hide and then I gotta come find you. Or find out you're gone, like you tried to do at the hotel. I don't like that at all."
"I'm sorry. I don't think I realized I was doing it that much."
I lift my hand and push her long hair away from her face so I can see her better. "I'm a little worried that if I'm gone on tour, and you get some kind of bug up your ass about something, you're either gonna move out of the house while I'm gone, or not answer the phone when I call…things like that. That will seriously drive me crazy. I'd rather you just confronted me with whatever's bothering you."
She leans her forehead against my chest for a moment and then looks up again. "Okay, you're right. I'll try not to do it. I definitely won't move out—I can promise you that. This is just hard, ya know? It hurts hearing that you don't like me in that way. That's not exactly what I was hoping for in a husband."
"Do you think I liked hearing that you don't like the way I look? I have feelings too. I may joke and be sarcastic a lot, but I still was hoping that whoever I ended up with wouldn't be repulsed by me."
Her hands clutch the scarf that's still draped around my neck. "I'm sorry." Her voice is soft, almost inaudible. "And I'm not repulsed by you."
"You could prove it by giving me a kiss. Maybe." I move my hand to her chin and gently lift her head up. "You might actually like it."
"Close your eyes," she says. "I can't do it if you're looking at me like that."
"Are you twelve? Stop stalling and put your lips on me like you own me."
I close my eyes and wait. A few seconds go by and I feel her go up on her tiptoes. Her lips touch mine quickly, then they're gone.
My eyes fly open. "What the hell was that?"
"A kiss."
I laugh in her face. "That was not a kiss."
"Yeah, it was. Don't laugh at me."
" That was supposed to prove to me that you're not repulsed by me? If anything that proves you are."
"Talon, I am not. Not at all. I'm just kinda…shy, I guess. And not used to kissing on demand." Her eyes lower again, like she's afraid to make eye contact with me for too long.
And then it hits me. It's not that she's not attracted to me. It’s that she's too attracted to me and it's freaking her out. She's a jittery, nervous mess around me.
This changes everything.
This, I can have even more fun with.
----
" S o , what do you want to do now?" I ask her as we're strolling back to the guesthouse after having dinner with Gram.
"Hmmm…" She ponders. "Anything?"
"Sure. If you wanna go someplace, I'll take you."
"Do you promise not to laugh at me?"
"No, I'll probably laugh at you, but I'll still do whatever you want to do."
"Fair enough. I want to cuddle on the couch, watch a movie, and eat popcorn."
I stop walking. " That's what you want to do?"
Shrugging a little, she grabs my hand and tugs me to keep walking. "Yeah. It's actually something I've been wanting to do for a long time, but it sucks to watch movies alone."
"Ya know what? That's something I haven’t done since I was in high school. So you're on."
"Are you kidding me?"
I open the front door of the guesthouse and let her go in before me. "Nope, I can honestly say I haven't hung out on the couch and watched a movie with a chick since I was about sixteen."
"Wow. What did you do with your exes then?"
The past ten years flash through my brain, and none of it seems like something I should share with my new wife if I plan to keep her. "You really don't want to hear all that, babe."
"Yeah, no. I don't want to hear gory details, but I'm really curious. How did you spend your time?"
I head into the kitchen to see if I can find some microwaveable popcorn. Gram keeps this place pretty stocked since there is usually someone staying here several days per month. "Um…drink, sometimes some recreational drugs, went to some clubs, and sex. That's about it."
She opens a cabinet and pulls out a box. "Look!
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