left unsaid, but I guess you’re too thick to realize that.” I want to disappear into thin air. I can’t shake the mental image of what he’s been doing. It makes me feel cheap, dirty somehow. If I had any doubts about harboring any type of attraction for him, they’re long gone now. I don’t feel the least bit turned on from knowing that he gets off to me. I know guys do things like that…but Ryan? I guess I’ll always think of him as that cute little boy I used to go on the swing set with. And it saddens me that we had to grow up and come to a fork in the road like this.
“Ivy!” He calls after me but I don’t hesitate. I keep going. He can’t follow because he has to pay the check. I have a few precious minutes in order to escape. If I head for the road, he’ll easily find me in his Jeep. Instead, I duck around the back and slide down a wooded ravine. At the bottom, I press my back against a rock and take a deep breath. It’s dark and the mosquitoes are biting but I don’t care. I just needed to get away from him for a while.
I’ll wait here twenty minutes or so and then I’ll try walking back. If he’s waiting for me in the office parking lot, I’ll just ignore him and get in my car. All I need is a little breather to steady my heart rate and clear my head. I’m too embarrassed to face him. I have to collect myself first. It’s not like I’ll never speak to him again or anything. But no one likes to hear that their oldest friend has turned them into a sex object. I didn’t think my day could get any worse. What is it with this family? Are they all out to ruin me through some psychotic joint conspiracy?
Things have gotten so bad that it feels like I don’t have anyone left to turn to. I mean, I guess I could talk to Sophie about it but she’d probably think I was overreacting. She wouldn’t understand why I’m upset about what Ryan told me. She’d most likely tell me I’m blowing things out of proportion and that boys will be boys. She’s not exactly a prude herself, and her advice would be something about how I should be flattered that Ryan thinks of me that way. I can’t deal with hearing anything along those lines.
There is someone I can call, not to talk about this, but just to hear a comforting voice. I’ve been stubborn in avoiding thinking about him all day. I’m sure he’s been leaving me messages but Lauren reset the password on my extension’s voice mail so that she would be able to screen all of my calls. She doesn’t want me talking to him on the job but she can’t prevent what I do in my personal life. At least, that’s what I’m trying to tell myself.
I already preprogrammed the number of the garden center into my phone. It’s after nine o’clock and he’s probably not even there but it’s worth a shot. This can very well blow up in my face. But as for the day I’m having, there’s no way in hell I can go back to my dorm room and cry in my pillow. I require more than that. I want a living, breathing connection to a human being. Everything with him has always felt so natural, so right. It’s the other people getting in the way that’s the problem.
Before I can second guess myself, I turn on my phone, illuminating the darkness that surrounds me. Tapping through my contacts, I find his name and hit the call button. It rings and rings and rings. And just when I’m about to hang up, I hear his breathless greeting. “Hello?”
Chapter Twelve Eric
I’m by the tub-sized sink in the back trying to scrape the caked mud off my boots when I hear the phone ring. I’m not in the mood to run barefoot to the register in order to pick it up but my deep-seated work ethic overrules my inner slacker. I race for the receiver, nearly knocking it off the wall in my haste. If it’s a telemarketer, they’re about to get an earful concerning the Riverside Gardens’ number being on the official ‘do not call’ list.
“Hello?” Her voice sounds shaky but I’d know it
“Ivy!” He calls after me but I don’t hesitate. I keep going. He can’t follow because he has to pay the check. I have a few precious minutes in order to escape. If I head for the road, he’ll easily find me in his Jeep. Instead, I duck around the back and slide down a wooded ravine. At the bottom, I press my back against a rock and take a deep breath. It’s dark and the mosquitoes are biting but I don’t care. I just needed to get away from him for a while.
I’ll wait here twenty minutes or so and then I’ll try walking back. If he’s waiting for me in the office parking lot, I’ll just ignore him and get in my car. All I need is a little breather to steady my heart rate and clear my head. I’m too embarrassed to face him. I have to collect myself first. It’s not like I’ll never speak to him again or anything. But no one likes to hear that their oldest friend has turned them into a sex object. I didn’t think my day could get any worse. What is it with this family? Are they all out to ruin me through some psychotic joint conspiracy?
Things have gotten so bad that it feels like I don’t have anyone left to turn to. I mean, I guess I could talk to Sophie about it but she’d probably think I was overreacting. She wouldn’t understand why I’m upset about what Ryan told me. She’d most likely tell me I’m blowing things out of proportion and that boys will be boys. She’s not exactly a prude herself, and her advice would be something about how I should be flattered that Ryan thinks of me that way. I can’t deal with hearing anything along those lines.
There is someone I can call, not to talk about this, but just to hear a comforting voice. I’ve been stubborn in avoiding thinking about him all day. I’m sure he’s been leaving me messages but Lauren reset the password on my extension’s voice mail so that she would be able to screen all of my calls. She doesn’t want me talking to him on the job but she can’t prevent what I do in my personal life. At least, that’s what I’m trying to tell myself.
I already preprogrammed the number of the garden center into my phone. It’s after nine o’clock and he’s probably not even there but it’s worth a shot. This can very well blow up in my face. But as for the day I’m having, there’s no way in hell I can go back to my dorm room and cry in my pillow. I require more than that. I want a living, breathing connection to a human being. Everything with him has always felt so natural, so right. It’s the other people getting in the way that’s the problem.
Before I can second guess myself, I turn on my phone, illuminating the darkness that surrounds me. Tapping through my contacts, I find his name and hit the call button. It rings and rings and rings. And just when I’m about to hang up, I hear his breathless greeting. “Hello?”
Chapter Twelve Eric
I’m by the tub-sized sink in the back trying to scrape the caked mud off my boots when I hear the phone ring. I’m not in the mood to run barefoot to the register in order to pick it up but my deep-seated work ethic overrules my inner slacker. I race for the receiver, nearly knocking it off the wall in my haste. If it’s a telemarketer, they’re about to get an earful concerning the Riverside Gardens’ number being on the official ‘do not call’ list.
“Hello?” Her voice sounds shaky but I’d know it
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