didn’t need an aphrodisiac to want Bella, and he knew enough about women to know you could only take one to bed so many times before she started expecting more than a good fuck.
Bella had followed him. Her small hands circled his hips and her forehead pressed into the center of his back. The heat of her body so close to his drew his balls in tight. She didn’t say a word. Her hands slipped beneath the front of his shirt and caressed his abs, his ribs. Her fingertips traced a line beneath his pecs and then slowly circled his flat nipples. Another shot of awareness lit a trail down his spine. His cock stretched, poking out of the waistband of his briefs. He bit his lip. If he had half a brain, he’d push her hands away and let her down easy. But he’d never been smart when it came to women.
“Why do the horses mean so much to you?” Bella’s gaze was gentle, her voice soft. “I mean, I understand that you fight for animal rights, but don’t you think the developers will find them a good home?”
88
Carmie L’Rae
“No. I don’t trust them to do that, and …” He scratched the back of his neck and squinted into the sun. He’d never told anyone what the horses meant to him. Didn’t know if he could.
“And what?” Bella caressed his chest. “Tell me, Trevor.”
“I was engaged. And young. Too stupid to pull my head out of my ass and be a real man. She loved me.” His voice cracked and he stopped. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t talk about her. Even after all these years he couldn’t say her name. After he lost her, the horses were the only ones who hadn’t questioned him. He had lived with them, near them, for nearly a month. They were the only company he wanted. And he would never forget what he owed them.
“I can’t imagine a woman not loving you.” Bella’s fingers stroked his skin. “You’re easy to love.” He could hear the honesty in her voice and he knew he had to tell her the truth about himself. She needed to run for the hills and after he told her who he was, she would. He had no doubt about that.
“No I ain’t. I’m a man. Worse than most.” He took a deep breath.
“And it’s best you know it. I had everything a man should want, but I met a pretty little thing that I wanted a piece of. Figured I was too young to tie myself down and broke off the engagement for a piece of ass.”
“Maybe she wasn’t the one you were supposed to marry. Maybe you were too young.”
He pushed her hands away and turned to face her. “Don’t sugarcoat this, Bella. She loved me, and I loved her. But it wasn’t enough for me. I ran off to have a good time, didn’t think twice about what I’d done to her. And …”
He walked off. He couldn’t do it. Couldn’t say the words. Hell, he tried every day to block out the memory of what he’d done, but he’d never shake that guilt. And he’d never make the mistake of letting a woman fall in love with him again.
Surrender the Booty
89
Bella came up behind him again. Her hands slipped around his waist. Her forehead pressed into his back and her palms flattened against his stomach. “What happened?”
He stared straight ahead into the clear blue sky. He didn’t dare turn around to see Bella’s reaction. “She killed herself. She was pregnant, but I didn’t know that part.”
“Would it have changed anything if you’d known?”
He shook his head. “I don’t know. It’s hard to remember who I was back then, or what would have made sense to me at the time.”
He expected her to leave. To run as far away as she could. But her arms tightened around him. “Make love to me,” she said.
90
Carmie L’Rae
Chapter Eighteen
Bella’s skin burned from the rub of Trevor’s whiskers. Her pussy lips were so swollen they ached, but pure satisfaction made her muscles feel warm and liquid. The sun shone behind him like a halo as he looked down at her, his cock still buried deep and the smell of sex as fragrant as the grass beneath
Bella had followed him. Her small hands circled his hips and her forehead pressed into the center of his back. The heat of her body so close to his drew his balls in tight. She didn’t say a word. Her hands slipped beneath the front of his shirt and caressed his abs, his ribs. Her fingertips traced a line beneath his pecs and then slowly circled his flat nipples. Another shot of awareness lit a trail down his spine. His cock stretched, poking out of the waistband of his briefs. He bit his lip. If he had half a brain, he’d push her hands away and let her down easy. But he’d never been smart when it came to women.
“Why do the horses mean so much to you?” Bella’s gaze was gentle, her voice soft. “I mean, I understand that you fight for animal rights, but don’t you think the developers will find them a good home?”
88
Carmie L’Rae
“No. I don’t trust them to do that, and …” He scratched the back of his neck and squinted into the sun. He’d never told anyone what the horses meant to him. Didn’t know if he could.
“And what?” Bella caressed his chest. “Tell me, Trevor.”
“I was engaged. And young. Too stupid to pull my head out of my ass and be a real man. She loved me.” His voice cracked and he stopped. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t talk about her. Even after all these years he couldn’t say her name. After he lost her, the horses were the only ones who hadn’t questioned him. He had lived with them, near them, for nearly a month. They were the only company he wanted. And he would never forget what he owed them.
“I can’t imagine a woman not loving you.” Bella’s fingers stroked his skin. “You’re easy to love.” He could hear the honesty in her voice and he knew he had to tell her the truth about himself. She needed to run for the hills and after he told her who he was, she would. He had no doubt about that.
“No I ain’t. I’m a man. Worse than most.” He took a deep breath.
“And it’s best you know it. I had everything a man should want, but I met a pretty little thing that I wanted a piece of. Figured I was too young to tie myself down and broke off the engagement for a piece of ass.”
“Maybe she wasn’t the one you were supposed to marry. Maybe you were too young.”
He pushed her hands away and turned to face her. “Don’t sugarcoat this, Bella. She loved me, and I loved her. But it wasn’t enough for me. I ran off to have a good time, didn’t think twice about what I’d done to her. And …”
He walked off. He couldn’t do it. Couldn’t say the words. Hell, he tried every day to block out the memory of what he’d done, but he’d never shake that guilt. And he’d never make the mistake of letting a woman fall in love with him again.
Surrender the Booty
89
Bella came up behind him again. Her hands slipped around his waist. Her forehead pressed into his back and her palms flattened against his stomach. “What happened?”
He stared straight ahead into the clear blue sky. He didn’t dare turn around to see Bella’s reaction. “She killed herself. She was pregnant, but I didn’t know that part.”
“Would it have changed anything if you’d known?”
He shook his head. “I don’t know. It’s hard to remember who I was back then, or what would have made sense to me at the time.”
He expected her to leave. To run as far away as she could. But her arms tightened around him. “Make love to me,” she said.
90
Carmie L’Rae
Chapter Eighteen
Bella’s skin burned from the rub of Trevor’s whiskers. Her pussy lips were so swollen they ached, but pure satisfaction made her muscles feel warm and liquid. The sun shone behind him like a halo as he looked down at her, his cock still buried deep and the smell of sex as fragrant as the grass beneath
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