well.”
“Okay,” she said, as she nodded her head.
I’m not an idiot. No doubt she probably thinks I only have one reason for wanting to see her alone in my office. But she was getting distracted here. Her work and the success of my project were being affected and that’s not something I had any interest in continuing. I had to put a stop to it before it got any worse. I leaned forward and crossed my hands on my desk.
“You need to stand up for yourself in this world, Fiona. Don’t let people push you around, because if they think they can, they will. Is that how you want to live?”
“Gabe, I don’t understand what you’re talking about.”
“Your goddamn cultures, Fiona. Do you expect me to believe that was your fault?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well let me put this another way. Do you want to win this competition or not?”
“Of course I do, more than anything. I need the money and…”
Just then, she tucked her bracelet beneath her sleeve once again and shook her head.
“And what?” I asked.
“Nothing.”
“No, it’s not nothing.” I snapped. “If it's on your mind, you need to just say it. What is it?”
“Well, it’s not just the money. I want to work with you. I think you’re brilliant. That’s all.”
Her flattery caught me by surprise. To my knowledge, it was the first time she’d ever said something nice to me. Even so, she had to understand what I was trying to tell her. I allowed her compliment to go unacknowledged, hoping it would focus her attention.
“You need to get some backbone, Fiona. This position. It’s gonna require some guts, some balls, okay?”
She nodded. My challenge flushed her. Crimson streaks spread across her chest.
“Are you angry with me, Fiona?”
“A little, yes.”
“Good,” I replied. Sensing I had her full attention, I intended to make my point clear. “You know, I’ve heard nothing but good things about the quality of your work.”
“Thank you. I wish everyone felt the same way.”
“Fiona, life is filled with disappointment. Most of the time that comes in the form of other people. Trust me, you aren’t alone when it comes to being let down when it matters most. I’ll make this real simple for you. Can you catch up? Yes or no?”
“Yes, I think so.”
“Good. That’s what I was hoping you’d say.”
As I finished speaking, her face brightened a bit. I realized she’d been through a lot in her young life but she’d made it this far and in the process beaten out people ten years older than her. She had a ton of potential to not only be a great scientist, but a hell of a woman. Figuring she’d had enough of a scolding for the moment, I shifted gears a bit.
“I’ve… missed not being around the lab much. Seeing your smiling face. You look pretty today.”
Fiona’s eyes snapped to mine. She held them there for an instant before swallowing and repositioning a wayward wisp of hair behind her ear.
Smirking, I nodded at her. “Still struggling with the whole compliment thing I see?”
She chewed her lip for a moment before she replied. “Yes, I’m sorr…”
I glared at her, as she stopped herself mid-sentence.
FIONA
As I made my way back down to the lab, I reflected on what Gabe said and the way he challenged me. On an intellectual level, I understood what he meant, but knowing and doing are two different things.
My immediate reaction to our discussion was twofold.
The first of these was that it was easy for someone like him to ‘have balls’ as he put it. He had the world at his beck and call, bending it to his will. Gabe was accustomed to people doing whatever he asked of them, without question. The type of abrasive persona he suggested I assume was about as foreign to me as a polar bear at the equator. Of course as I considered it, this notion was made even worse since the two things I feared most, even more than death itself, were public speaking and confrontation.
Yet, following Gabe’s suggestion to
“Okay,” she said, as she nodded her head.
I’m not an idiot. No doubt she probably thinks I only have one reason for wanting to see her alone in my office. But she was getting distracted here. Her work and the success of my project were being affected and that’s not something I had any interest in continuing. I had to put a stop to it before it got any worse. I leaned forward and crossed my hands on my desk.
“You need to stand up for yourself in this world, Fiona. Don’t let people push you around, because if they think they can, they will. Is that how you want to live?”
“Gabe, I don’t understand what you’re talking about.”
“Your goddamn cultures, Fiona. Do you expect me to believe that was your fault?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well let me put this another way. Do you want to win this competition or not?”
“Of course I do, more than anything. I need the money and…”
Just then, she tucked her bracelet beneath her sleeve once again and shook her head.
“And what?” I asked.
“Nothing.”
“No, it’s not nothing.” I snapped. “If it's on your mind, you need to just say it. What is it?”
“Well, it’s not just the money. I want to work with you. I think you’re brilliant. That’s all.”
Her flattery caught me by surprise. To my knowledge, it was the first time she’d ever said something nice to me. Even so, she had to understand what I was trying to tell her. I allowed her compliment to go unacknowledged, hoping it would focus her attention.
“You need to get some backbone, Fiona. This position. It’s gonna require some guts, some balls, okay?”
She nodded. My challenge flushed her. Crimson streaks spread across her chest.
“Are you angry with me, Fiona?”
“A little, yes.”
“Good,” I replied. Sensing I had her full attention, I intended to make my point clear. “You know, I’ve heard nothing but good things about the quality of your work.”
“Thank you. I wish everyone felt the same way.”
“Fiona, life is filled with disappointment. Most of the time that comes in the form of other people. Trust me, you aren’t alone when it comes to being let down when it matters most. I’ll make this real simple for you. Can you catch up? Yes or no?”
“Yes, I think so.”
“Good. That’s what I was hoping you’d say.”
As I finished speaking, her face brightened a bit. I realized she’d been through a lot in her young life but she’d made it this far and in the process beaten out people ten years older than her. She had a ton of potential to not only be a great scientist, but a hell of a woman. Figuring she’d had enough of a scolding for the moment, I shifted gears a bit.
“I’ve… missed not being around the lab much. Seeing your smiling face. You look pretty today.”
Fiona’s eyes snapped to mine. She held them there for an instant before swallowing and repositioning a wayward wisp of hair behind her ear.
Smirking, I nodded at her. “Still struggling with the whole compliment thing I see?”
She chewed her lip for a moment before she replied. “Yes, I’m sorr…”
I glared at her, as she stopped herself mid-sentence.
FIONA
As I made my way back down to the lab, I reflected on what Gabe said and the way he challenged me. On an intellectual level, I understood what he meant, but knowing and doing are two different things.
My immediate reaction to our discussion was twofold.
The first of these was that it was easy for someone like him to ‘have balls’ as he put it. He had the world at his beck and call, bending it to his will. Gabe was accustomed to people doing whatever he asked of them, without question. The type of abrasive persona he suggested I assume was about as foreign to me as a polar bear at the equator. Of course as I considered it, this notion was made even worse since the two things I feared most, even more than death itself, were public speaking and confrontation.
Yet, following Gabe’s suggestion to
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