Sleepless Nights (The Donovans of the Delta) by Peggy Webb

flowers?”
    “Tanner sent orchids this morning.”
    “Amanda, that man is a sweetheart. Grab him while you can.”
    “That man is nothing but trouble. The necklace goes back as soon as I close the shop. That’s final.” She carried the box to her safe.
    “You probably don’t believe in Santa Claus, either.”
    Amanda laughed. “Don’t look so crestfallen, Maxine. I believe in Santa Claus; I just don’t believe in Tanner Donovan.”
    She didn’t believe in Tanner, she told herself later that afternoon as she left her shop and drove straight to his house. He was as unpredictable as the wind. Today he was spending time with her, but only because it amused him. Who knew what would hold his interest the next day? All the Donovans had a wild streak. He might decide to buy a rugby team and traipse off to England or to Australia. Even if she did have feelings for the man, she wasn’t about to settle for leftover love and part-time attention. It hadn’t been enough before, and it wasn’t enough now.
    As she parked her Honda in front of the Donovans’ sprawling Victorian house, she noticed that Tanner’s car was not in sight. She could almost taste her disappointment. All during her drive into the country she had pictured exactly how he would look when he came to the door, the endearing way his dark hair would be tousled across his forehead, the exact gleam of mischief and pleasure in his eyes, the way he would walk, with that bold, casual grace that only an athlete possessed.
    Anna Donovan opened the door. Amanda rarely saw her, except from up in the choir loft on Sundays. She had forgotten how dear Anna always looked, standing in her doorway, smiling that warm welcome.
    “Hello, Anna.”
    Anna held out her arms. “Amanda! It’s so good to have you here again.”
    Anna had always been gracious and charming, even after she’d jilted Tanner. Suddenly nostalgic, Amanda returned the hug.
    “Let me look at you. My, my. As pretty as a picture. Won’t Tanner be glad to see you!”
    Probably not, Amanda thought, but she didn’t tell Anna so.
    “Thank you for the chicken and dumplings, Anna. They were delicious.”
    “You’re so welcome, dear. Tanner’s always been so thoughtful, even when he was a little boy. He used to go out in the pasture and pick me a bouquet, just because he liked to see me smile, he’d say. I never had the heart to tell him he was picking bitter weeds. Listen to me going on about Tanner and letting you stand out in the cold.”
    She took Amanda’s arm and led her into the house.
    “Come in, my dear, and warm your feet by the fire. Theo’s boys built a big one in the library.” She chatted on as she showed Amanda into the cozy, book-lined room she called the library. “All the menfolk have gone off to get a Christmas tree. We’re expecting Paul and his family tomorrow. We always wait for the twins to come before we trim the tree. Little Matthew is the spitting image of Paul. Did you know Martie’s expecting again?”
    “No. That’s lovely.” Amanda felt a strange twinge of envy and regret. She’d wanted children. Claude had too. After three years of trying, they’d finally sought professional help. Claude had been sterile. She’d mourned her unborn children as if they’d had names and faces. The lack of children, as much as anything, had contributed to the breakup of their marriage.
    If she and Tanner had married, would they have had a family by now? Would one of them have been a miniature Tanner?
    She felt empty, and for the first time in her life she felt old. Thirty-three and no children. No one to help trim a tree, no one to play Santa for, no little hands to hold, no sweet heads to tousle.
    She firmly pushed the thoughts away and turned her attention back to her hostess. Anna was asking about her parents.
    “They’re fine. They’re spending Christmas in England.”
    “They always did love to travel.” Anna’s face suddenly lit up. “I do believe I hear the