Skeleton Women by Mingmei Yip Page B

him against any more bullets. But all that was to be seen of the lion was the costume lying deflated on the grass. Gao tore off Lung’s bloodstained silk gown and, after a brief examination, declared that his boss was fine, since the bullet had missed his heart.
    “Are you sure?” Zhu, the abbot, Chief Li, and a few other dignitaries barked simultaneously.
    “Honorable guests”—Gao looked relieved and shaken up at the same time—“Master Lung is fine. The bullet hit his dragon amulet and bounced off. The bleeding was nothing serious, just from his skin being grazed.”
    Right after Gao finished, Zhu pushed him aside, probably to resume his right-hand man status. As he put his handkerchief on his boss’s chest to soak up the blood, he screamed, “Call an ambulance!”
    Lung suddenly sprang up, yelling, “Go chase the lion dancers!”
    Immediately Chief Li and his team, together with Gao and his bodyguards, pushed aside the onlookers and dashed away.
    Seeing that the gangster head was indeed very much alive, everybody clapped. The abbot leaned toward Lung, smiling. “Master Lung, anyone who impossibly survives such a calamity will be blessed by many generations of good luck and longevity!”
    Danan Busi, biyou houfu .
    Then I noticed Rainbow Chang trying to approach us but being stopped by Zhu. It was obvious that the right-hand man didn’t like the columnist. Did he have reason to be suspicious of her?
    A few moments later, the group that had set out to chase the lion dancers came back. But to Lung and Zhu’s bitter disappointment, they were empty-handed. Chief Li announced that they had found three dead bodies just behind the temple. To everyone’s disappointment, the bodies were not those of the would-be assassins but those of the real lion dancers.
    This is what the Chinese call fang bu sheng fang: Being careful is no guarantee for success.
    Lung struggled to stand up, then slapped Gao and the other bodyguards. Obscenities, including cutting off their father’s turtle head and fornicating their collective mothers’ vaginas, spewed from his mouth like lava from a volcano. I was taken aback to hear Lung speak with such vulgarity. But then I realized that this was the former shoe-shine boy revealing himself in public.
    Then another surprise followed. He slapped the abbot.
    “Damn you and your mother’s cunt! You told me you’d screened the lion dancers!”
    The abbot lowered his head, looking humiliated and terrified. “I ... I ...” he stuttered. “I did, many ... times, very thoroughly. But ... how was I supposed to know that the assassins would murder them and take over the performance?”
    Zhu shot the abbot his I-will-wipe-out-your-whole-family look. “Shut up! Don’t you know the rule that no one talks back to the master? !”
    The abbot’s head dropped almost to his navel. “Yes, yes, of course. I’m ... sorry, so sorry.”
    Besides Zhu, Police Chief Li was the only person who was spared by Lung, so he was happy to play the mediator. “Master Lung, everything is okay. Trust me, we will catch the assassins soon.”
    “You’d better, Chief,” Lung said, then turned to me—to my surprise—with a big smile. “Camilla, your dragon amulet saved my life.” He touched my cheek affectionately. “You’re also the first one who screamed for help.” Then he made a sweeping gesture to include everyone. “From now on I declare Miss Camilla my lucky star!”
    Everyone clapped.
    “Master Lung, thank you.” I smiled demurely. “Of course I’ll do anything to protect you, always.”
    I bit my inner lip. Lucky star or not, now I had to think of another way to have him killed. Damn my unintended benevolence!
    Lung yelled to no one in particular, “Now take me back home!”
    Zhu leaned toward him and said gently, “Master, the ambulance will be here any minute. It’s better to be checked by a doctor to make sure everything is all right.”
    In no time an ambulance pulled to a stop in front of