days.”
“I hate when you’re cryptic like this.”
“Right, but if I wasn’t, then I’d just have to tell you and it wouldn’t be a surprise anymore.”
“I’ll assume that it’s something good, then.”’
“I think you’ll be pleased.”
I settle back into the leather seat of the BMW. I’m not in the mood to play any games, or to guess what this surprise could possibly be. There have been, in my opinion, enough surprises in regards to this wedding, and I doubt that I’ll be as thrilled with whatever surprise he’s got as my father thinks I will. I lean my head against the glass, watching the dark blurs of scenery zoom by.
“You tired?” Dad asks. “I know it’s been a whirlwind couple of days. And you’ve been traveling, on top of all that. I know it probably seems like a bit much, trying to create this family and all, but I really love Stephanie. I want things to work out for us, and that means making being a family. Not just me and her, but you and her daughters, too. They seem like lovely young ladies, her daughters, wouldn’t you say?”
I don’t lift my head from the window. “Oh yes, just lovely.”
“I know it might seem pointless, trying to do this whole family thing, with you guys being adults and everything, but I did always want a family.”
“You had one,” I say pointedly.
“I know. And I fucked things up because I just wasn’t ready. Don’t think I didn’t feel remorse about what happened with your mother. I wish things could’ve been different for us, I do. I wish we could’ve given you the kind of childhood I always wanted. Which was to say, one of stability and love.”
“Mum loves me plenty.”
“That’s good. She’s a good woman, your mother. I’ve never thought otherwise. But, like I said, I just wasn’t ready at the time.”
I lift my head from the window and take a deep breath and try to detach myself from the conversation. Dad and I have never really been able to have one of those successful heart-to-heart talks, the sort of conversation that might be painful at the time but you can walk away from feeling good about after.
“I’m imagine there’s a lot of people who aren’t necessarily ready to have a kid, yet they find themselves with one anyway. That doesn’t give them free reign to just go off and act however they want.”
“I know, Jai.” He gives me a sidelong look. The car hums silently across the pavement. “I guess I just brought this up because I want you to know that I’m going to try to do things differently this time. I think I’m finally ready for a family. And I think it’s good we’re all going to be here at the house together, to give us some time to just be together. I want that. I want you to have some time to really get to know Stephanie, to get to know your stepsisters, before you head back home. We do all have lives to get back to, after all.”
I lean my head back against the window. Oh, the irony. I decide not to mention that I actually happen to know one of my stepsisters-to-be rather well. In a certain sense, anyway.
Chapter Eleven
Emma
When I get back to the apartment, I close the door behind me and then stand there for a minute, back against the door, as though I’m trying to prevent someone from opening it, using myself as a human barricade. And in fact, part of me feels like I’ve been running all night, trying to escape something. It would be so easy to just stay here, to lock the door, crawl into bed, and not come out until tomorrow, or maybe two weeks from now.
“I hate when you’re cryptic like this.”
“Right, but if I wasn’t, then I’d just have to tell you and it wouldn’t be a surprise anymore.”
“I’ll assume that it’s something good, then.”’
“I think you’ll be pleased.”
I settle back into the leather seat of the BMW. I’m not in the mood to play any games, or to guess what this surprise could possibly be. There have been, in my opinion, enough surprises in regards to this wedding, and I doubt that I’ll be as thrilled with whatever surprise he’s got as my father thinks I will. I lean my head against the glass, watching the dark blurs of scenery zoom by.
“You tired?” Dad asks. “I know it’s been a whirlwind couple of days. And you’ve been traveling, on top of all that. I know it probably seems like a bit much, trying to create this family and all, but I really love Stephanie. I want things to work out for us, and that means making being a family. Not just me and her, but you and her daughters, too. They seem like lovely young ladies, her daughters, wouldn’t you say?”
I don’t lift my head from the window. “Oh yes, just lovely.”
“I know it might seem pointless, trying to do this whole family thing, with you guys being adults and everything, but I did always want a family.”
“You had one,” I say pointedly.
“I know. And I fucked things up because I just wasn’t ready. Don’t think I didn’t feel remorse about what happened with your mother. I wish things could’ve been different for us, I do. I wish we could’ve given you the kind of childhood I always wanted. Which was to say, one of stability and love.”
“Mum loves me plenty.”
“That’s good. She’s a good woman, your mother. I’ve never thought otherwise. But, like I said, I just wasn’t ready at the time.”
I lift my head from the window and take a deep breath and try to detach myself from the conversation. Dad and I have never really been able to have one of those successful heart-to-heart talks, the sort of conversation that might be painful at the time but you can walk away from feeling good about after.
“I’m imagine there’s a lot of people who aren’t necessarily ready to have a kid, yet they find themselves with one anyway. That doesn’t give them free reign to just go off and act however they want.”
“I know, Jai.” He gives me a sidelong look. The car hums silently across the pavement. “I guess I just brought this up because I want you to know that I’m going to try to do things differently this time. I think I’m finally ready for a family. And I think it’s good we’re all going to be here at the house together, to give us some time to just be together. I want that. I want you to have some time to really get to know Stephanie, to get to know your stepsisters, before you head back home. We do all have lives to get back to, after all.”
I lean my head back against the window. Oh, the irony. I decide not to mention that I actually happen to know one of my stepsisters-to-be rather well. In a certain sense, anyway.
Chapter Eleven
Emma
When I get back to the apartment, I close the door behind me and then stand there for a minute, back against the door, as though I’m trying to prevent someone from opening it, using myself as a human barricade. And in fact, part of me feels like I’ve been running all night, trying to escape something. It would be so easy to just stay here, to lock the door, crawl into bed, and not come out until tomorrow, or maybe two weeks from now.
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