changing room where the next class, intermediate ballet, is just coming out. They quiet down a little when they see us coming, and as usual, they eye us with respect. I remember doing the same thing when I was younger. Always longing to be one of the advanced ballerinas, wanting to grow up. Now all I want is to turn back the clock.
“Are you going to be okay by the time of the recital?” Amanda asks me as we get dressed.
“What?”
She gives me an innocent look. “Well, you know, you’ve been through a lot with your mom. And we noticed Madame Reginald talking to you. I’d understand if you needed to step down from—”
“Amanda!” Faith interrupts. “Why are you—?”
“I’m just saying.” Amanda holds up her hands. “I’d be willing to step in for you, Cleo. If you needed it.”
“Willing? ” Faith laughs. “You’d plow down Cleo on your way to center stage just to take a bow.”
“I would not.” Amanda feigns a hurt expression. “That’s so not true.”
“You’ve been mad about not getting to play Cinderella for months.”
Amanda gives Faith a haughty look now. “I’m not mad. I was disappointed that Madame Reginald favored Cleo. But I’m pretty sure it’s only because Cleo is a blonde, and thanks to Disney, everyone thinks Cinderella should be a blonde, which is ridiculous.”
“You think I was chosen for my hair color?” Finally I say something.
“I’m just saying.” Amanda shrugs as she pulls on a hoodie.
“Cleo got picked because she’s the best dancer.”
I give Faith a weak smile. “Thanks.”
“Or because she’s Madame’s favorite.”
I hurry to button my jeans, wanting out of here, away from Amanda’s poison. “You know, I really don’t need this right now.”
Amanda gives me a somewhat apologetic look. “Yeah, I know. I’m sorry, Cleo. I hadn’t really meant to make it sound like that. I was only saying if it’s too much for you, I’m willing to learn your dances and step in for you. You know, if you need me to. That’s all.” She smiles. “No hard feelings, right?”
“Right.” I shove my feet into my shoes as I cram my ballet things into my bag. “See you guys later.” I pull my hair out of the bun, giving it a shake.
“Sorry about Amanda,” Faith says as I head for the door.
“It’s okay; I understand.” And I do understand. Amanda wants to dance the lead. She’s made it clear. And maybe she’ll get to. I just don’t want to hand it to her on a silver platter. I’d rather let her sweat a little.
I’m just coming out of the stairwell when I spot Daniel standing over by the door. “Hey,” I call to him. “Did I keep you waiting?”
“No, it’s okay.” He comes over to me. “In fact, I hope you don’t mind that I snuck upstairs and peeked at you girls while you were dancing.”
“Seriously?”
He looks embarrassed. “Is that okay?”
I shrug. “There’s no rule against it. A lot of the moms stick around and watch. Not in our class so much, although my mom used to like to watch. She would pretend to knit or read a magazine sometimes, but she was always watching.”
“Did that make today hard?” He opens the door for me. “Being there without her?”
I just nod as we go out onto the sidewalk. Swallowing hard and willing myself not to cry, I desperately long for a pill right now.
. . . [CHAPTER 12] . . . . . . . . . . . .
D aniel points to The Coffee Station, a small coffeehouse just down the street. “Is that okay for coffee?”
“Sure.” And just like that, we’re walking down the sidewalk together. Is this really happening, or am I daydreaming or delusional? I cannot believe I’m with Daniel right now. It is seriously surreal, and I’m tempted to do something really lame like pinch myself.
As he opens the door, a bell jingles and the smell of fresh-roasted coffee and the loud roar of the espresso machine confirm that this is indeed real.
I listen as Daniel places his order and, partly out of
“Are you going to be okay by the time of the recital?” Amanda asks me as we get dressed.
“What?”
She gives me an innocent look. “Well, you know, you’ve been through a lot with your mom. And we noticed Madame Reginald talking to you. I’d understand if you needed to step down from—”
“Amanda!” Faith interrupts. “Why are you—?”
“I’m just saying.” Amanda holds up her hands. “I’d be willing to step in for you, Cleo. If you needed it.”
“Willing? ” Faith laughs. “You’d plow down Cleo on your way to center stage just to take a bow.”
“I would not.” Amanda feigns a hurt expression. “That’s so not true.”
“You’ve been mad about not getting to play Cinderella for months.”
Amanda gives Faith a haughty look now. “I’m not mad. I was disappointed that Madame Reginald favored Cleo. But I’m pretty sure it’s only because Cleo is a blonde, and thanks to Disney, everyone thinks Cinderella should be a blonde, which is ridiculous.”
“You think I was chosen for my hair color?” Finally I say something.
“I’m just saying.” Amanda shrugs as she pulls on a hoodie.
“Cleo got picked because she’s the best dancer.”
I give Faith a weak smile. “Thanks.”
“Or because she’s Madame’s favorite.”
I hurry to button my jeans, wanting out of here, away from Amanda’s poison. “You know, I really don’t need this right now.”
Amanda gives me a somewhat apologetic look. “Yeah, I know. I’m sorry, Cleo. I hadn’t really meant to make it sound like that. I was only saying if it’s too much for you, I’m willing to learn your dances and step in for you. You know, if you need me to. That’s all.” She smiles. “No hard feelings, right?”
“Right.” I shove my feet into my shoes as I cram my ballet things into my bag. “See you guys later.” I pull my hair out of the bun, giving it a shake.
“Sorry about Amanda,” Faith says as I head for the door.
“It’s okay; I understand.” And I do understand. Amanda wants to dance the lead. She’s made it clear. And maybe she’ll get to. I just don’t want to hand it to her on a silver platter. I’d rather let her sweat a little.
I’m just coming out of the stairwell when I spot Daniel standing over by the door. “Hey,” I call to him. “Did I keep you waiting?”
“No, it’s okay.” He comes over to me. “In fact, I hope you don’t mind that I snuck upstairs and peeked at you girls while you were dancing.”
“Seriously?”
He looks embarrassed. “Is that okay?”
I shrug. “There’s no rule against it. A lot of the moms stick around and watch. Not in our class so much, although my mom used to like to watch. She would pretend to knit or read a magazine sometimes, but she was always watching.”
“Did that make today hard?” He opens the door for me. “Being there without her?”
I just nod as we go out onto the sidewalk. Swallowing hard and willing myself not to cry, I desperately long for a pill right now.
. . . [CHAPTER 12] . . . . . . . . . . . .
D aniel points to The Coffee Station, a small coffeehouse just down the street. “Is that okay for coffee?”
“Sure.” And just like that, we’re walking down the sidewalk together. Is this really happening, or am I daydreaming or delusional? I cannot believe I’m with Daniel right now. It is seriously surreal, and I’m tempted to do something really lame like pinch myself.
As he opens the door, a bell jingles and the smell of fresh-roasted coffee and the loud roar of the espresso machine confirm that this is indeed real.
I listen as Daniel places his order and, partly out of
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