come by, in this harsh place they call the New World.”
“Go on.”
“Well, you relax and start to feel other things, other than just having your hole cleaned you know? You feel like maybe the bum bone’s connected to the cock bone––in your case, oh women, you’re all one big singular sensation. One minute your crying and the next your cumming. How do you do it? Just let go, relax. You’ve let someone massage your twat so what the hell, let them massage your you-know-what, maybe even poke a finger, or better, up there.”
“Honestly? I just can’t see it happening. It’s just way too private back there.”
“Oh God, listen send the busboy over. Then I can demonstrate. Let’s start from the beginning. Now first, what he does is lie across my lap, oh yeah, undoes his pants and all that, and then I gently take his dick, which is pressing against my own crotch, and I massage it until I feel some response, then I start to stroke those rosy cheeks, all chilly-bum from the cold outside.”
Gillian giggled. “Okay so far I’m with you. It’s even kind of titillating.”
“Val?” Randy said, “You with me?”
“I’m all ears.”
“Good, so anyway here’s how it goes. I stroke the cheeks and get a bit closer to the hole and then he starts to figure out that just maybe I have a certain destination in mind, so he relaxes a bit.”
“What if he farts?”
“Well in this fantasy he doesn’t, and with any luck you have taken precautions too, and avoided the bean salad and hummus for dinner. Avoided dinner for that matter. Anyway he knows what pleasure awaits him and I have let him think that there is more to come so I let a finger or two slide down that lovely crevasse to touch the soft pink skin surrounding that lovely hole, and then the fun starts. He oohs, and ahhhs to let me know that he is enjoying it. That’s the signal. I won’t force it if I get the feeling that it’s a no-go. You have to trust your feelings you know, and your lover’s instincts. If anyone forces anything from choking you with their dick to being the least bit disrespectful down there, time to move on.”
“Come on. Get on with the good bits.”
“So anyway, I slip one then maybe two and depending on the feeling, a few fingers up the poop shoot.”
“Poop shoot? Okay I think I’ve heard enough.”
“––to continue. The fingers may be quite enough. I mean we aren’t on a tight schedule here one hopes. So, I’ve got the busboy on my lap and he’s moaning away and all and so I push a little more, not just in, mind you. I do have a destination.”
“Being?”
“The famous prostate. It’s sort of on the north side of the inside, kind of behind the balls, towards the penis if you know what I mean. So, once you hit that I tell you, it’s like having another penis.”
“I thought you said the balls were like having another penis. How many penises have you got down there anyway?”
“It’s a total pleasure centre, that’s all. When you press on that, it’s like someone has put their finger in your cock––from the inside.”
“So, what’s your bus boy doing at this point?”
“Probably writhing and most likely has a real honest to God hard-on and is in pleasureland.”
“What if he wants more?”
“He can have it; I’d bring him around so that he was sitting on my lap and then I’d slide in the big salami, gently though, since I’d only had two fingers in him, and my dick is, well, without exagerration, and I’m not bragging, worth at least five fingers. Then you just work your way up. Lots of lube too.”
“So that’s what it’s all about.”
“Well there is that aesthetic aspect to the ass or any part of the human body really, where you just look and let the eyes do the walking, and appreciate it for what it is, for what you see.”
“So theoretically a guy might enjoy a finger up the ass.”
“Straight guys need a bit of coaxing, but deep down they yearn for it.”
At this point
“Go on.”
“Well, you relax and start to feel other things, other than just having your hole cleaned you know? You feel like maybe the bum bone’s connected to the cock bone––in your case, oh women, you’re all one big singular sensation. One minute your crying and the next your cumming. How do you do it? Just let go, relax. You’ve let someone massage your twat so what the hell, let them massage your you-know-what, maybe even poke a finger, or better, up there.”
“Honestly? I just can’t see it happening. It’s just way too private back there.”
“Oh God, listen send the busboy over. Then I can demonstrate. Let’s start from the beginning. Now first, what he does is lie across my lap, oh yeah, undoes his pants and all that, and then I gently take his dick, which is pressing against my own crotch, and I massage it until I feel some response, then I start to stroke those rosy cheeks, all chilly-bum from the cold outside.”
Gillian giggled. “Okay so far I’m with you. It’s even kind of titillating.”
“Val?” Randy said, “You with me?”
“I’m all ears.”
“Good, so anyway here’s how it goes. I stroke the cheeks and get a bit closer to the hole and then he starts to figure out that just maybe I have a certain destination in mind, so he relaxes a bit.”
“What if he farts?”
“Well in this fantasy he doesn’t, and with any luck you have taken precautions too, and avoided the bean salad and hummus for dinner. Avoided dinner for that matter. Anyway he knows what pleasure awaits him and I have let him think that there is more to come so I let a finger or two slide down that lovely crevasse to touch the soft pink skin surrounding that lovely hole, and then the fun starts. He oohs, and ahhhs to let me know that he is enjoying it. That’s the signal. I won’t force it if I get the feeling that it’s a no-go. You have to trust your feelings you know, and your lover’s instincts. If anyone forces anything from choking you with their dick to being the least bit disrespectful down there, time to move on.”
“Come on. Get on with the good bits.”
“So anyway, I slip one then maybe two and depending on the feeling, a few fingers up the poop shoot.”
“Poop shoot? Okay I think I’ve heard enough.”
“––to continue. The fingers may be quite enough. I mean we aren’t on a tight schedule here one hopes. So, I’ve got the busboy on my lap and he’s moaning away and all and so I push a little more, not just in, mind you. I do have a destination.”
“Being?”
“The famous prostate. It’s sort of on the north side of the inside, kind of behind the balls, towards the penis if you know what I mean. So, once you hit that I tell you, it’s like having another penis.”
“I thought you said the balls were like having another penis. How many penises have you got down there anyway?”
“It’s a total pleasure centre, that’s all. When you press on that, it’s like someone has put their finger in your cock––from the inside.”
“So, what’s your bus boy doing at this point?”
“Probably writhing and most likely has a real honest to God hard-on and is in pleasureland.”
“What if he wants more?”
“He can have it; I’d bring him around so that he was sitting on my lap and then I’d slide in the big salami, gently though, since I’d only had two fingers in him, and my dick is, well, without exagerration, and I’m not bragging, worth at least five fingers. Then you just work your way up. Lots of lube too.”
“So that’s what it’s all about.”
“Well there is that aesthetic aspect to the ass or any part of the human body really, where you just look and let the eyes do the walking, and appreciate it for what it is, for what you see.”
“So theoretically a guy might enjoy a finger up the ass.”
“Straight guys need a bit of coaxing, but deep down they yearn for it.”
At this point
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