SEIZED Part 1: New Adult Romantic Suspense (Seize Me Romance Fiction Series) by JC Coulton Page B

for a second as I pour myself another coffee. I can’t believe he’s only telling me all this now.
    “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know anything about your parents.” I top off his coffee, too.
    “It’s cool, Carrie. Don’t worry. Bren and I kept our cards pretty close during that time. No one knew.”
    He’s cast a whole new light on the guy I thought I knew, and despite my suspicion, I can’t help but admire him.
    “So, you got sober and Brenda had a baby? How’d you guys manage?”
    “I dunno, we just did. I was her birthing partner, so we went to the appointments together. We got by on our savings and moved into a nicer place in Brooklyn. My sponsor convinced me to go back to security work, and I also pulled shifts at the gym during the day. She worked until she couldn’t anymore, and then had George. Our neighbor helped her look after him. The first year went by so fast I couldn’t believe it. From day one, they were close. I joined the force when I met some rookies who trained at the gym with us. Cool guys, pretty good pay, and it seemed like a career, ya know? By then, George was nearly two, and it just felt like a good fit. The police here look after their own, so once I was in, leaving didn’t make sense anymore. And Brenda worked on accounting stuff at home to make ends meet. It’s been five years since I joined, but I made detective quickly, and I knew the anti-trafficking squad was where I needed to go. I just knew it.”
    I shake my head, and say nothing for a second. “Christ, Blake, I had no idea.”
    I just don’t know what to say, I’m floored at his story, and a little ashamed. There I was worrying about my own little life in Cedar Rapids, while all the while he was going through hell. His leaving had nothing to do with me. I don’t know what to say, so I just thank him for being so honest and drink my coffee. He looks at me and laughs.
    “Bit of a conversation stopper, isn’t it?” His eyebrow goes up again, giving me that sexy look, and I nearly spit my coffee on the table.
    “Ah, yes, you could say that.”
    In that moment, our old camaraderie is back again, and I’m smiling despite everything that’s happened. My head is still aching, though.
    “Do you have any Advil?” I ask, holding my temples.
    He gets up, rummages in a kitchen drawer, and brings me back two tablets and a little bowl of the yogurt.
    “Here, you have to have them with food.”
    Something in his gentle voice makes me want to cry. What the fuck is wrong with me?
    I try, but I can’t control the tears, so I sob into my hands. I cry for Blake and for Brenda, but mostly I cry for me. For the years I spent feeling rejected by him. And the pain I felt aborting the baby that came from the most painful time of my life. For the disgust and the unfairness of the abuse, and for the loss of my teenage self. I didn’t get a chance to feel excited about losing my virginity, because it was taken from me before I was ready to give it to someone I cared about.
    Neither of us got the perfect American life that’s in the movies, and it just feels so fucking sad. Blake doesn’t say anything. I tell him I’m fine, that I’m tired, and I can tell he doesn’t believe me. But he agrees that I should head to bed, and even walks me up the stairs. For a moment, I think he’s going to hug me, but he doesn’t. I leave him in the hallway, strip off Brenda’s clothes, and climb into the bed alone.

CHAPTER TEN
    Blake
    I t’s good to see her. In a way, I’ve been wanting to tell her my story since I first got sober. Of everyone I knew in Cedar Rapids, she was the only one worth making amends to. She was the only one I cared about. I nearly told her about Dad so many times back then, but I just couldn’t. It was our job to pick him up off the floor when we got back from school, not her.
    I didn’t want to be like him, and make my situation anyone else’s responsibility. Fucking stupid old fool. It was easier for me to deny there