her breath coming in foggy bursts, her face rage-red. “Can I come home with you?”
Johanna struggled for words, and found only, “I came to deliver these.”
“Will,” Charlotte called to her brother still standing in the doorway. “Can you take this?”
Will trundled down the steps. He took the box from Johanna’s arms. “Merry Fucking Christmas, huh?”
Johanna tried to find some quippy answer but the tears too-near brimming stopped her cold. “You want to come too?” she asked.
“Nah,” he answered. “But thanks.”
“He has no choice,” Charlotte said. “But I do, and I don’t want to be here. Do you mind, Jo?”
“I—”
“Tell dad I went to the Coco’s,” Charlotte called to her brother and hauled Johanna in her wake. Though younger, she was bigger by several inches and a few pounds. Johanna was no match for her strength or her barely contained fury. Charlotte climbed into the passenger seat of the Explorer, pulled out her cell and started texting.
“You sure you want to leave?” Johanna turned over the ignition, flicked on the heat. She felt a little sorry for Gina, but she was a grown woman and had made her choices. Millie and Tony, Caleb and Will—Johanna’s heart broke for them. She could only imagine their confusion. They had to miss their mother, no matter how loyal they were to Charlie. Charlotte’s fury only made it worse. What would she have done if Nina hadn’t been there for her when they were taken from their parents? What would have happened to Emmaline and Julietta had their two older sisters not comforted them after the crash? Johanna found herself tearing up, but quelled it before Charlotte looked up from her text.
“Dad says it’s fine, see?” She turned the screen to Johanna.
There was more to the text, but Charlotte hadn’t lied. Johanna gave her credit for making sure he was all right with her leaving. Pulling away from the curb, she spotted Gina at the window in the house that had been hers, the house she raised her children in. A hollow opened in Johanna’s belly, but she drove away.
The further they got from her house, the more Charlotte relaxed. “Crapola.”
“What’s wrong?”
Charlotte held up her foot, and the hideous pink-piggy slipper she wore. Laughter erupted, easing Charlotte’s fury a little more, enough to have her sigh.
“I can’t believe she just showed up,” Charlotte said. “Like, surprise! Mommy’s here! What was she thinking?”
“That it’s Christmas and she misses all of you,” Johanna said before thinking better. Thankfully, Charlotte’s explosive temper seemed reserved for her mother.
“I guess. It was still wrong, ruining Christmas for the kids.”
“How did Millie and Tony react?”
Charlotte shrugged. “They were happy, at first. Then she said she was taking us to her cousin Tracy’s for the rest of the school break and Millie freaked out. That’s when I lost it. How dare she, Johanna? How fucking dare she?”
“I don’t know what to say, Charlotte.”
“There’s really nothing to say. Don’t worry about it. So—” She put her cell phone in the pocket of her flannel shirt. “It was nice of you, bringing over the goodies we didn’t get to take home yesterday.”
“There was no way we were going to eat it all.” Johanna grinned. “And I wanted to see your dad.”
“Score another one for Mom.” But Charlotte laughed this time.
Talk turned to summer, and Cape May, and how great it was going to be. Johanna was mostly happy to let the conversation turn, though she was slightly uncomfortable with the assumptions Charlotte made. She and Charlie only just rekindled a romance twenty-years cooled. It was new. Fragile, and not the done-deal Charlotte seemed to believe it was. The morning’s troubles slapped Johanna in the face with the fact that being with Charlie meant an instant family of kids who would look to her as a stepmother, not just someone fun to bake cookies with. It meant dealing
Johanna struggled for words, and found only, “I came to deliver these.”
“Will,” Charlotte called to her brother still standing in the doorway. “Can you take this?”
Will trundled down the steps. He took the box from Johanna’s arms. “Merry Fucking Christmas, huh?”
Johanna tried to find some quippy answer but the tears too-near brimming stopped her cold. “You want to come too?” she asked.
“Nah,” he answered. “But thanks.”
“He has no choice,” Charlotte said. “But I do, and I don’t want to be here. Do you mind, Jo?”
“I—”
“Tell dad I went to the Coco’s,” Charlotte called to her brother and hauled Johanna in her wake. Though younger, she was bigger by several inches and a few pounds. Johanna was no match for her strength or her barely contained fury. Charlotte climbed into the passenger seat of the Explorer, pulled out her cell and started texting.
“You sure you want to leave?” Johanna turned over the ignition, flicked on the heat. She felt a little sorry for Gina, but she was a grown woman and had made her choices. Millie and Tony, Caleb and Will—Johanna’s heart broke for them. She could only imagine their confusion. They had to miss their mother, no matter how loyal they were to Charlie. Charlotte’s fury only made it worse. What would she have done if Nina hadn’t been there for her when they were taken from their parents? What would have happened to Emmaline and Julietta had their two older sisters not comforted them after the crash? Johanna found herself tearing up, but quelled it before Charlotte looked up from her text.
“Dad says it’s fine, see?” She turned the screen to Johanna.
There was more to the text, but Charlotte hadn’t lied. Johanna gave her credit for making sure he was all right with her leaving. Pulling away from the curb, she spotted Gina at the window in the house that had been hers, the house she raised her children in. A hollow opened in Johanna’s belly, but she drove away.
The further they got from her house, the more Charlotte relaxed. “Crapola.”
“What’s wrong?”
Charlotte held up her foot, and the hideous pink-piggy slipper she wore. Laughter erupted, easing Charlotte’s fury a little more, enough to have her sigh.
“I can’t believe she just showed up,” Charlotte said. “Like, surprise! Mommy’s here! What was she thinking?”
“That it’s Christmas and she misses all of you,” Johanna said before thinking better. Thankfully, Charlotte’s explosive temper seemed reserved for her mother.
“I guess. It was still wrong, ruining Christmas for the kids.”
“How did Millie and Tony react?”
Charlotte shrugged. “They were happy, at first. Then she said she was taking us to her cousin Tracy’s for the rest of the school break and Millie freaked out. That’s when I lost it. How dare she, Johanna? How fucking dare she?”
“I don’t know what to say, Charlotte.”
“There’s really nothing to say. Don’t worry about it. So—” She put her cell phone in the pocket of her flannel shirt. “It was nice of you, bringing over the goodies we didn’t get to take home yesterday.”
“There was no way we were going to eat it all.” Johanna grinned. “And I wanted to see your dad.”
“Score another one for Mom.” But Charlotte laughed this time.
Talk turned to summer, and Cape May, and how great it was going to be. Johanna was mostly happy to let the conversation turn, though she was slightly uncomfortable with the assumptions Charlotte made. She and Charlie only just rekindled a romance twenty-years cooled. It was new. Fragile, and not the done-deal Charlotte seemed to believe it was. The morning’s troubles slapped Johanna in the face with the fact that being with Charlie meant an instant family of kids who would look to her as a stepmother, not just someone fun to bake cookies with. It meant dealing
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