School Days According to Humphrey by Betty G. Birney Page A

idea.
    â€œNow I can finally find out for myself,” I said.
    I flung open the door to my cage and scurried to the edge of the table and slid down the cord hanging from the blinds.
    Getting to Mrs. Brisbane’s desk was easy.
    Getting on Mrs. Brisbane’s desk was VERY-VERY-VERY difficult. In fact, it would have been completely impossible, except for those little bars between the chair legs. I think they’re called “rungs,” but don’t ask me why.
    However, climbing the chair that way meant reaching up as high as I could, grabbing hold and then pulling myself up, rung by rung, with all my might. (I’m strong because I get so much exercise.)
    Then, balancing on the top rung, I had to reach up high again, pull myself up and slide onto the seat of the chair.
    After stopping to catch my breath, I reached up one more time, pulled myself up to the arm of the chair and rested again.
    Luckily, Mrs. Brisbane always pushes her chair under the desk, so from the arm of the chair, it wasn’t too difficult to pull myself up onto the desktop.
    Although I was eager to get to the cards, I couldn’t help noticing Rockin’ Aki’s hamster ball.
    I took a closer look. I’d really only seen Aki up close when he was moving. Now, he was completely still. He actually didn’t look much like a hamster at all. His fur wasn’t shiny and golden like mine, and his eyes were lifeless pieces of plastic. I felt a little sorry for him.
    I decided to concentrate on the cards. One big card said Brisbane’s Buddies and the rest were laid out in pairs. Each card had one student’s name on it. Above each pair was a label that said something different.
    â€œIt looks like some kind of game, Og!” I squeaked to my friend. “I’ll try to figure it out.”
    I strolled up and down the rows of cards, reading the labels: Teacher’s Assistants, Door and Line Monitors, Homework Collectors.
    â€œThey’re classroom jobs, Og!” I squeaked. “Mrs. Brisbane is pairing up two people for each job so they’ll have to work together. Isn’t that a good idea?”
    â€œBOING-BOING!” Og twanged.
    â€œBulletin Board Designers . . . oh, and listen to this job: Animal Handlers,” I told him.
    â€œBOING-BOING-BOING!” Og replied, splashing loudly in his tank.
    Now that I understood what Brisbane’s Buddies were, I started reading the names she had paired together.
    â€œPaul G. and Kelsey, Thomas and Phoebe, Holly and Rosie . . .” I suddenly stopped. Mrs. Brisbane had worked hard and done a good job. But I had a few ideas of my own. Since part of my job as a classroom hamster is to help the teacher, I decided it would be okay for me to lend her a paw. She needed all the help she could get.
    â€œI’m just going to make a few teeny-weeny changes, Og,” I explained to my friend as I carefully started moving the cards around.
    What may seem like a little card to a human is actually a HUGE card to a small hamster, so it took a lot of time and effort to move them and line them up.
    I was thinking so hard about what I was doing, I forgot about Aki until I accidentally backed into his hamster ball. I guess I hit the switch, because lights began to flash and the ball started to loop and twirl across the desk.
    â€œRockin’ Aki! Rock ’n’ roll rules!” The ball spun wildly.
    â€œStop it, Aki!” I squeaked. Then I remembered he wasn’t real.
    The ball twirled across the cards, which slowed it down.
    BUMPITY-BUMP-BUMP!
    Aki had seemed like a lot of fun when it was daytime and all my friends were there. But now, his hamster ball was rocking and rolling out of control! Twice, it spun dangerously near the edge of the table. If it fell off, it would be broken forever and Mrs. Brisbane would be VERY-VERY-VERY upset.
    There had to be some way to shut it off. I could see the little on/off button as it spun across the desk, but every