suppose you’re taking birth control, are you?”
“Oh, that. No, I’m not taking anything. But you don’t have to worry. My doctors have already told me that I’ll never conceive. Too much medication, too much radiation. One side effect is that women don’t conceive.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.”
What the doctor had really said was that it was most unlikely. And that if she did conceive, she wouldn’t be able to carry a child to term. At the time that had been the least of her concerns, but now, basking in the warmth of what she’d just shared, she allowed herself to regret her inability to conceive.
Loving Rogan was only a temporary moment in her life. She understood that. He was the now, not theforever. She’d stay as long as he wanted her, then she’d go. She didn’t dare plan for more. The thought of a future that included a child was incomprehensible. All she’d ever hoped for was this. She’d stay in his arms for as long as he’d hold her. And nothing would stop her from loving it.
And loving him.
“Is this wonderful feeling going to last, Rogan?” She felt a wave of new longing sweep through her, and she reached out, just to touch his hair, to convince herself that it had been real.
“I don’t know. Once I might have said that it was great, and maybe we might try it again sometime. But hell’s bells, you’ve still got me floating in some kind of magnetic field.”
“I have? How can you tell?”
“Well, for one thing, I’m already hard again.”
“You are? Good.” There was a satisfied whisper in her voice, a wonder that she gave reality to as she reached down and touched him. He throbbed beneath her touch, hot and moist and velvety.
“How long can you stay like this?”
“Good question. Normally I’m good for about fifteen minutes, maybe longer, if you don’t do anything to hasten the process.”
“You’re good for fifteen minutes and after that you’re bad? I think I want to know about the bad.”
“Carolina, another few minutes of your touching me, and you’re never going to find out about the bad. I won’t last that long.” He jerked her hand away, pulling it to his lips, where he planted a kiss in her palm.
“Is there a name for this, for what I feel now?”
“It’s called afterglow.”
“ ‘Afterglow.’ I like that. I feel as if I’m glowing. Are you glowing too?”
“I went past glowing when you touched me. I’m churning. I’m boiling. I’m just plain hurting, darling.”
“Oh, Rogan, I never want you to hurt. What can I do to help?”
He moved over her again, studying her beautiful eyes in the shadows. They were a deep blue now, clear and trusting. She smiled as her body closed around him, taking him inside her, slowly and without hesitation.
“Am I hurting you?” she asked.
“Oh, yes, it hurts wonderfully. I like the thought of us taking away each other’s hurts.” She slid her legs around him, holding him inside her. Her lower body began to vibrate, and he felt the beginning of his own tremors. His mouth found hers, his tongue plunging inside her.
Rogan clutched her shoulders, moaning softly as she arched against him, meeting every thrust with growing tension. He heard her short gasps of pleasure and felt the coil of tension begin to unravel in a shattering heat that caught and built to a crescendo of feeling.
“Oh, Rogan,” she whispered. “I never knew.”
“Now you do, Carolina,” he said as he turned over, pulling her with him so that she was tucked into the space over his heart. “And so do I.”
Outside the ship, the water stilled. The sun slid behind the trees and the marsh came to life with the movement of night creatures.
He watched her sleep, watched and thought about another Carrie who might have loved her captain in that same bed. He thought about other golden hair across the pillow, someone else’s innocent trust, two other people’s growing love. Even the memory was confusing. He didn’t know
“Oh, that. No, I’m not taking anything. But you don’t have to worry. My doctors have already told me that I’ll never conceive. Too much medication, too much radiation. One side effect is that women don’t conceive.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.”
What the doctor had really said was that it was most unlikely. And that if she did conceive, she wouldn’t be able to carry a child to term. At the time that had been the least of her concerns, but now, basking in the warmth of what she’d just shared, she allowed herself to regret her inability to conceive.
Loving Rogan was only a temporary moment in her life. She understood that. He was the now, not theforever. She’d stay as long as he wanted her, then she’d go. She didn’t dare plan for more. The thought of a future that included a child was incomprehensible. All she’d ever hoped for was this. She’d stay in his arms for as long as he’d hold her. And nothing would stop her from loving it.
And loving him.
“Is this wonderful feeling going to last, Rogan?” She felt a wave of new longing sweep through her, and she reached out, just to touch his hair, to convince herself that it had been real.
“I don’t know. Once I might have said that it was great, and maybe we might try it again sometime. But hell’s bells, you’ve still got me floating in some kind of magnetic field.”
“I have? How can you tell?”
“Well, for one thing, I’m already hard again.”
“You are? Good.” There was a satisfied whisper in her voice, a wonder that she gave reality to as she reached down and touched him. He throbbed beneath her touch, hot and moist and velvety.
“How long can you stay like this?”
“Good question. Normally I’m good for about fifteen minutes, maybe longer, if you don’t do anything to hasten the process.”
“You’re good for fifteen minutes and after that you’re bad? I think I want to know about the bad.”
“Carolina, another few minutes of your touching me, and you’re never going to find out about the bad. I won’t last that long.” He jerked her hand away, pulling it to his lips, where he planted a kiss in her palm.
“Is there a name for this, for what I feel now?”
“It’s called afterglow.”
“ ‘Afterglow.’ I like that. I feel as if I’m glowing. Are you glowing too?”
“I went past glowing when you touched me. I’m churning. I’m boiling. I’m just plain hurting, darling.”
“Oh, Rogan, I never want you to hurt. What can I do to help?”
He moved over her again, studying her beautiful eyes in the shadows. They were a deep blue now, clear and trusting. She smiled as her body closed around him, taking him inside her, slowly and without hesitation.
“Am I hurting you?” she asked.
“Oh, yes, it hurts wonderfully. I like the thought of us taking away each other’s hurts.” She slid her legs around him, holding him inside her. Her lower body began to vibrate, and he felt the beginning of his own tremors. His mouth found hers, his tongue plunging inside her.
Rogan clutched her shoulders, moaning softly as she arched against him, meeting every thrust with growing tension. He heard her short gasps of pleasure and felt the coil of tension begin to unravel in a shattering heat that caught and built to a crescendo of feeling.
“Oh, Rogan,” she whispered. “I never knew.”
“Now you do, Carolina,” he said as he turned over, pulling her with him so that she was tucked into the space over his heart. “And so do I.”
Outside the ship, the water stilled. The sun slid behind the trees and the marsh came to life with the movement of night creatures.
He watched her sleep, watched and thought about another Carrie who might have loved her captain in that same bed. He thought about other golden hair across the pillow, someone else’s innocent trust, two other people’s growing love. Even the memory was confusing. He didn’t know
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