ROMULUS (The Innerworld Affairs Series, Book 1) by Marilyn Campbell Page A
Authors: Marilyn Campbell
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aren't leaving us unguarded."
"I can't help but wonder if they're protecting us or protecting others from us."
"Ooh, what a spooky thought. Let's talk about Rom instead."
Aster made a face and ordered lasagna and salad for lunch. Throughout their meal, Aster flitted from one topic to another without Cherry interrupting. By the time they were cleaning up, Cherry had had enough.
"C'mon, kid. Lower the shields and talk to me."
Aster sighed. "I left so much undone. I keep thinking about the Greener Oceans research project. We were finally starting to get some sizable donations. These people could probably save us years of research just by advising us of how to do what needs to be done. We have a golden opportunity to make some real progress out there.
"But that's not the worst of it. If I'm declared dead, the whole Foundation is in jeopardy. I need to get back. I've decided that Romulus seems very rational. I'm going to have to convince him how important my work is. I've faced tough audiences before."
"And had them eating out of your hand in an hour. So what's the problem?"
"I'm confused. He makes me so damned nervous. He touched my hand and I practically fell apart."
"Well, hell. Your hormones finally woke up, that's all. And what a man it took! You want him to help you. From what I saw today, you've got something he wants too. Why not just go with it? Don't tell me you're still being loyal to a dead man."
Aster sat in silence, hugging her knees close to her body. "It's not because of Dennis. Well, not exactly. I just don't have what it takes to seduce a man into giving me something I want."
Cherry stared pointedly at Aster's full breasts. " Au contraire from where I'm sitting, sweetie."
Aster sighed and shook her head. "There's something I've never told you, but now, well, maybe it'll help you understand. There's something very wrong with me. As a woman. It's the reason I never wanted you fixing me up with men." She took a slow, ragged breath. "I'm frigid."
Cherry burst out laughing.
"It's not funny." Aster's eyes teared up and Cherry quieted. "I'm a pitiful lover. Dennis always said it didn't matter. He was gentle and didn't force me to do it every time we were together, but I still felt nothing but revulsion when he touched me. I tried to fake a response to please him, but I couldn't even do that right."
"Why would you get engaged to someone so repulsive?" Nothing Aster said about Dennis would alter Cherry's opinion of him. She had always thought he was a phony and he had known it.
"You don't understand. He made me feel more loved than anyone ever had. As far as sex goes, I felt the same way about every man who came near me since I was fourteen."
"You never told me that whole story."
Aster now saw no reason to continue keeping it a secret. "My next-door neighbor was nineteen and had just come home from college. I always had a little crush on him. One afternoon, we were alone in my grandmother's house. When he teased me into a kiss, I liked it. I was more than willing to kiss some more.
"Then he started groping at me. I tried to push him away but he slapped me and told me to lay still or he'd hit me again." Her voice remained flat, unfeeling. "He called me a tease. Said I'd been begging for it. He raped me. Twice. It hurt so much afterward I could hardly walk."
"Did you tell your grandmother?"
Aster grimaced. "She would only have said what she did every time I behaved improperly—'like mother, like daughter'. She would have thrown me out and I had nowhere to go. Anyway, for a long time after that I would get physically ill if anyone touched me at all. To this day, I still have a problem if someone comes too close to me without warning or happens to be wearing the cologne he wore that day. I dated after that but I never let anyone get beyond a good-night kiss, so they didn't stick around long."
"So now you feel it was your fault Dennis couldn't turn you on. I'm sorry about what happened to you, kid, but
"I can't help but wonder if they're protecting us or protecting others from us."
"Ooh, what a spooky thought. Let's talk about Rom instead."
Aster made a face and ordered lasagna and salad for lunch. Throughout their meal, Aster flitted from one topic to another without Cherry interrupting. By the time they were cleaning up, Cherry had had enough.
"C'mon, kid. Lower the shields and talk to me."
Aster sighed. "I left so much undone. I keep thinking about the Greener Oceans research project. We were finally starting to get some sizable donations. These people could probably save us years of research just by advising us of how to do what needs to be done. We have a golden opportunity to make some real progress out there.
"But that's not the worst of it. If I'm declared dead, the whole Foundation is in jeopardy. I need to get back. I've decided that Romulus seems very rational. I'm going to have to convince him how important my work is. I've faced tough audiences before."
"And had them eating out of your hand in an hour. So what's the problem?"
"I'm confused. He makes me so damned nervous. He touched my hand and I practically fell apart."
"Well, hell. Your hormones finally woke up, that's all. And what a man it took! You want him to help you. From what I saw today, you've got something he wants too. Why not just go with it? Don't tell me you're still being loyal to a dead man."
Aster sat in silence, hugging her knees close to her body. "It's not because of Dennis. Well, not exactly. I just don't have what it takes to seduce a man into giving me something I want."
Cherry stared pointedly at Aster's full breasts. " Au contraire from where I'm sitting, sweetie."
Aster sighed and shook her head. "There's something I've never told you, but now, well, maybe it'll help you understand. There's something very wrong with me. As a woman. It's the reason I never wanted you fixing me up with men." She took a slow, ragged breath. "I'm frigid."
Cherry burst out laughing.
"It's not funny." Aster's eyes teared up and Cherry quieted. "I'm a pitiful lover. Dennis always said it didn't matter. He was gentle and didn't force me to do it every time we were together, but I still felt nothing but revulsion when he touched me. I tried to fake a response to please him, but I couldn't even do that right."
"Why would you get engaged to someone so repulsive?" Nothing Aster said about Dennis would alter Cherry's opinion of him. She had always thought he was a phony and he had known it.
"You don't understand. He made me feel more loved than anyone ever had. As far as sex goes, I felt the same way about every man who came near me since I was fourteen."
"You never told me that whole story."
Aster now saw no reason to continue keeping it a secret. "My next-door neighbor was nineteen and had just come home from college. I always had a little crush on him. One afternoon, we were alone in my grandmother's house. When he teased me into a kiss, I liked it. I was more than willing to kiss some more.
"Then he started groping at me. I tried to push him away but he slapped me and told me to lay still or he'd hit me again." Her voice remained flat, unfeeling. "He called me a tease. Said I'd been begging for it. He raped me. Twice. It hurt so much afterward I could hardly walk."
"Did you tell your grandmother?"
Aster grimaced. "She would only have said what she did every time I behaved improperly—'like mother, like daughter'. She would have thrown me out and I had nowhere to go. Anyway, for a long time after that I would get physically ill if anyone touched me at all. To this day, I still have a problem if someone comes too close to me without warning or happens to be wearing the cologne he wore that day. I dated after that but I never let anyone get beyond a good-night kiss, so they didn't stick around long."
"So now you feel it was your fault Dennis couldn't turn you on. I'm sorry about what happened to you, kid, but
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