Rewired (The Progress Series) by Amy Queau Page A

I still don’t know who this guy is.”
    “Why are you worried about the guy ? I don’t understand you at all! Who gives a shit about the guy ?”
    “It’s the only way I’m going to figure out this whole mess.”
    “Here, let me help you.” Gabe began sternly. “One, she cheated. Two, you forgave her. Three, she left.” His hands raised. “I’m sorry, man. But it seems like she’s not interested.”
    “You forgot, four, she won’t stop texting me. Five, she was still wearing my ring a few days ago. Six, she can’t forgive herself. Seven, there’s a whole shitload of crap you don’t know about her past…”
    “Okay, enough! Listen to yourself. You’re a madman! I’ve never seen you like this. You don’t even bother putting your contacts in anymore. And when was the last time you took a shower? Shit, you’re obsessed!”
    “She was… my life . She was the only thing I needed. I could live without a job. Or a place to sleep. Hell, I probably could’ve figured out how to hunt for food with my bare hands. But without her, I never thought I could survive.”
    “And yet here you are, still breathing.”
    “I’m gutted, Gabe. I don’t have the will for any of it anymore.”
    “Why don’t you just talk to Charlie about it instead of playing detective on the computer? You don’t think I notice, but I do. You’re not the kind of guy that researches bipolar disorder and PTSD for fun, Sam. Shit, you try to stay the hell away from that damn computer unless it’s for work. So why don’t you just call her and get it over with?”
    “I know. I’ve been kind of an asshole about it. I ran into her a few days ago at our apartment, and I didn’t realize how hard it was going to be to look at her.”
    “Because you’re still in love with her?”
    Sam stopped, rubbed the frost around his glass and shrugged. “Maybe.”
    “Well, think about it. If you still feel the same way in a week or two, then I think it’s clear what you need to do. That is, if she wants you back too.”
    Sam’s head snapped up. “What makes you think I want her back?”
    “I’ve known you since you were twelve. I can read you like a book. You keep going back and forth from wanting her to not wanting her, being mad to being sad, forgiving her to not forgiving her. You sound like a broken record.” Shrugging, he continued. “Like I said, give it a week or two. I’m sure your answer will become clearer. That, or you could ask your mom to bust out her Tarot cards.”
    Sam forced a laugh and gave a curt nod.
     
    After returning to Gabe’s place that evening, Sam sat on his bed staring at the painting of Charlie. His eyes slowly swept the room, trying to put together the pieces of the puzzle.
    One of Charlie’s journals lay open on the floor. There was a passage he had been thinking about since he first read it a few days earlier. Picking up the journal, he thumbed through it to find the right page.
     
    I’m still hopeful, though. Maybe there’s a guy out in the world, right now, living through the same shit that I am. And maybe I’ll meet him someday and he’ll just know. Together we can figure out why this had to happen to us, and even better, help each other heal. And maybe, just maybe, he’ll fall in love with who I am and not for what I look like. I’m asking too much, aren’t I? Well, a girl can dream.
     
    And maybe I’ll meet him someday and he’ll just know.
    And maybe I’ll meet him someday and he’ll just know.
     
    “Shit,” Sam sputtered. She thinks Jesse knows what she’s been through. She thinks he understands. And that means he’s gone through the same shit she has.
     
    How do I compete with that?

Part III

Charlie

Chapter One
     
    Present Day…
    All of these years in the pitch black, digging a hole in the dirt with his bare hands, pushing away everything inside of him, only to have it get lost or trampled by layers of nightmares and a black reality.
    Using every vice known to man in order to