Revenge of the Giant Robot Chickens

Revenge of the Giant Robot Chickens by Alex McCall Page A

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Authors: Alex McCall
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He can talk. He can talk quite well.”
    “I don’t care if he can recite Shakespeare. Why is he here? Why haven’t you got rid of him?”
    Hazel muttered something that I couldn’t quite grasp.
    “What did you say?” I asked her.
    “I said, he’s my friend.” Hazel at least had the decency to look bashful about it. “And he’s on our side. We trained with him and he didn’t get on that well with the other chickens. Honestly, he was a bit clumsy and they made fun of him. So when the signal went down and everything went crazy we sort of protected him.”
    I sighed. “Hazel, I know you mean well but you can’t trust him. He’s probably the spy. He could just be listening to everything we say and reporting it back to his masters.”
    “Well, that would be dumb,” Hazel told me. “Especially seeing as we’ve only survived this long because of him.”
    I stared at her, dumbfounded. “What do you mean?” I asked. “Explain.”
    “Well, you don’t really think that just because we spent some time with the chickens we magically know how to operate all their stuff, do you?” Hazel sounded almost amused at the thought. “We weren’t much trusted by most of them either. We weren’t allowed in the Catchers at any point and of course we never saw a Commando out of his suit. It’s impossible.”
    “What do you mean? Are they bonded to itsomehow?”
    Hazel frowned. “Sort of. It’s kind of hard to explain. They can only get the signal through their suits, and without the signal they’re just ordinary chickens.”
    “Sounds perfect,” I said, advancing towards ‘Clucky’ with hands outstretched. It moved back towards the laser controls.
    “Rayna.” Hazel put herself firmly between us. “Don’t do that. You’re frightening him.”
    “Well, how did you think I was going to react when I found out about this? Did you expect me to be happy?”
    “No! Of course I didn’t. But I thought Jesse would be here to help me explain.”
    An icy-cold sensation flooded my spine. “What? What do you mean?”
    “Jesse knows. And he’s OK with it.”
    That stopped me. If Hazel was telling the truth, then Jesse must have known about Clucky before he left. And he hadn’t mentioned it to me.
    He must have known I’d freak out. That wasn’t hard to work out. So if Hazel was telling the truth, he must have had a good reason not to tell me. Not just so that I wouldn’t freak out but because I didn’t need to know. Because it wasn’t a danger.
    I could trust Jesse about this. But only if Hazel wasn’t lying and he really did know.
    “Just call him,” Hazel was saying. “He’ll back me up.”
    “I would,” I said through gritted teeth, “but I tried earlier and got no response. He’s probably inside a Catcher right now.”
    “He’s not,” said Hazel with utter certainty. “I’d know about it.”
    “You would, would you? And how…?” I turned towards the chicken as the truth dawned on me. “Oh. So he’s your informant. He’s not just telling you about how to use the machines.”
    “That’s right,” Hazel said. “I told you he was useful.”
    “But how can his information be up to date? Is he flying between the chickens’ headquarters and here? And if he is, how do you know he’s not spying on us?”
    “He doesn’t go to their base. He stays in the building at all times – to avoid reactions like yours. The last thing he wants to do is to fight humans.”
    “So how does he know everything? How does he know Jesse hasn’t been captured?”
    Hazel squinted. “The signal that makes them smart also connects them, like a sort of mental internet. It’s how the chickens get their orders. They can all share news and stuff on it. I’ve had him keeping an eye on it for signs that Jesse’s been captured ever since he took off. Believe me, once they identified their prisoner, news like that would have got about.”
    “Why?” I asked. “Is Jesse special somehow?”
    Hazel shrugged. “Not

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