suggested, trying to sound braver than I felt. Theo scowled at me before pushing himself up and storming out of the bathroom, slamming the door behind him, mumbling something about irresponsibility and bad example.
I took a couple of deep breaths and forced myself up and over to the toilet, then peed on the stick as instructed. I took my time washing my hands, then headed out to the lounge to see my only son sitting on the sofa, right on the edge of his seat, his hands in tight fists.
“Need to wait a couple of minutes,” I said, shrugging uncomfortably. This had to be the most awkward thing that had happened to me in my life. Sitting in the lounge with my thirteen year old son, waiting to find out if I was pregnant from a one night stand. Irresponsible and bad example didn’t quite cover this situation.
I couldn’t allow myself to think about what would happen if it said positive. I didn’t believe in abortion, and I knew I would never be able to give up the baby for adoption because that would kill me inside. But how on earth would we survive? I was the only one bringing in any money, and I could barely afford for the two of us to live as it was. Finn’s money for child support was the only thing that was keeping us on the right side of the debt line. Another mouth to feed would be impossible.
“So who’s the guy if it’s not my dad?” Theo asked, breaking the uncomfortable silence.
“You’ve met him a couple of times. It’s Uncle Brandon’s friend, Harrison,” I answered, wincing.
Theo frowned distastefully. “That cocky prick that always flirts with you when we go to birthday parties?”
I laughed humourlessly and nodded.
That about sums up Harrison, yes.
“That’s him.”
Theo scoffed again, scrunching his nose up. “How long have you been together and why didn’t you tell me that you were seeing someone?” His tone was accusing. He was clearly angry with me.
“We’re not together. Actually it was just once,” I admitted weakly.
He snorted at that comment. “Classy. Knocked up by a one night stand. That’s really nice, Mother,” he stated sarcastically.
My chin trembled as my eyes glazed over. Everyone was going to think the same thing – that I was some kind of dirty whore who put it about and got in trouble. In reality, I had only ever been with three guys in my entire life. The guy who I lost my virginity to, Finn, and Harrison. That wouldn’t matter though; people would still think I was some kind of slag who put it about. I was going to be the girl who, at thirty-one, had two kids by two different dads and who hadn’t managed to hold on to either of them.
I closed my eyes, and Theo sighed deeply. I heard movement and then the sofa dipped next to me. When I opened my eyes, I saw that he’d moved up next to me. His arm looped around my shoulders, pulling me against his side tightly as he smiled reassuringly. “Everything’s OK, Mum. You still have me, and we’ll get through it. I’ll help you,” he whispered. I nodded and sniffed. “Besides, it might not be positive yet,” he said, almost a little hopefully.
I gulped and looked at my watch, checking how much time had passed. “Let’s see,” I croaked, leaning forward and picking it up.
As my hand closed over the little plastic stick, I imagined the two possible outcomes.
Outcome one: negative. I got to smile and put this behind me, never to have another one night stand again. I got to drum into Theo how terrifying that was and how I never wanted to see him in that situation.
Outcome two: positive. I had to tell Harrison Baxter, player and all round ladies’ man, that he was going to be a father. I got to struggle to make ends meet. We would probably have to move in with my mum because I wouldn’t be able to do it on my own. Everything would be almost impossible to handle. But on the upside, I would have another little baby, which I’d been longing for for years. It was kind of ironic that I’d been begging
I took a couple of deep breaths and forced myself up and over to the toilet, then peed on the stick as instructed. I took my time washing my hands, then headed out to the lounge to see my only son sitting on the sofa, right on the edge of his seat, his hands in tight fists.
“Need to wait a couple of minutes,” I said, shrugging uncomfortably. This had to be the most awkward thing that had happened to me in my life. Sitting in the lounge with my thirteen year old son, waiting to find out if I was pregnant from a one night stand. Irresponsible and bad example didn’t quite cover this situation.
I couldn’t allow myself to think about what would happen if it said positive. I didn’t believe in abortion, and I knew I would never be able to give up the baby for adoption because that would kill me inside. But how on earth would we survive? I was the only one bringing in any money, and I could barely afford for the two of us to live as it was. Finn’s money for child support was the only thing that was keeping us on the right side of the debt line. Another mouth to feed would be impossible.
“So who’s the guy if it’s not my dad?” Theo asked, breaking the uncomfortable silence.
“You’ve met him a couple of times. It’s Uncle Brandon’s friend, Harrison,” I answered, wincing.
Theo frowned distastefully. “That cocky prick that always flirts with you when we go to birthday parties?”
I laughed humourlessly and nodded.
That about sums up Harrison, yes.
“That’s him.”
Theo scoffed again, scrunching his nose up. “How long have you been together and why didn’t you tell me that you were seeing someone?” His tone was accusing. He was clearly angry with me.
“We’re not together. Actually it was just once,” I admitted weakly.
He snorted at that comment. “Classy. Knocked up by a one night stand. That’s really nice, Mother,” he stated sarcastically.
My chin trembled as my eyes glazed over. Everyone was going to think the same thing – that I was some kind of dirty whore who put it about and got in trouble. In reality, I had only ever been with three guys in my entire life. The guy who I lost my virginity to, Finn, and Harrison. That wouldn’t matter though; people would still think I was some kind of slag who put it about. I was going to be the girl who, at thirty-one, had two kids by two different dads and who hadn’t managed to hold on to either of them.
I closed my eyes, and Theo sighed deeply. I heard movement and then the sofa dipped next to me. When I opened my eyes, I saw that he’d moved up next to me. His arm looped around my shoulders, pulling me against his side tightly as he smiled reassuringly. “Everything’s OK, Mum. You still have me, and we’ll get through it. I’ll help you,” he whispered. I nodded and sniffed. “Besides, it might not be positive yet,” he said, almost a little hopefully.
I gulped and looked at my watch, checking how much time had passed. “Let’s see,” I croaked, leaning forward and picking it up.
As my hand closed over the little plastic stick, I imagined the two possible outcomes.
Outcome one: negative. I got to smile and put this behind me, never to have another one night stand again. I got to drum into Theo how terrifying that was and how I never wanted to see him in that situation.
Outcome two: positive. I had to tell Harrison Baxter, player and all round ladies’ man, that he was going to be a father. I got to struggle to make ends meet. We would probably have to move in with my mum because I wouldn’t be able to do it on my own. Everything would be almost impossible to handle. But on the upside, I would have another little baby, which I’d been longing for for years. It was kind of ironic that I’d been begging
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