compassion touched me, and I sat, watching the two of them. After a few minutes he stopped, tried to see her face.
“What’s the matter?” he asked her, but she shook her head, not raising her eyes to look at him.
“She was screaming about monsters,” I said.
“Monsters, Lala?” Simon tried, but Lavender said nothing.
He sighed. “This has been going on for almost two years. I don’t know how to help her. Night terrors, the doctor said, but…” He shook his head, worry etched under his tired eyes.
“She said she was having bad dreams,” I whispered. “She looked so scared.”
Simon reached out, ran his hand along my arm. “Thank you for getting to her so quickly.”
I nodded, my breath caught in my chest. “I was up.”
“Been walking around, have you?”
The question seemed innocent on the surface, but the knowing look on Simon’s face gave me pause.
“Why do you say that?”
“Because you’re covered in dust and spider webs, Rosetta. Where have you been?”
The photograph of him still in my pocket, I couldn’t tell him the truth—that I’d been sneaking around his home and poking into his life without permission. I flashed on the argument with my mother in courthouse hall. Angry words reverberating along the marble walls as the consequences of my choices tore my life apart.
Would finding out what I’d been up to prompt Simon to send me packing? How could I risk losing the only place I had to live?
Simon watched me intently, as if waiting for my answer.
I ran my gaze along his perfect lips and jaw, the feel of his hand on mine still fresh. My stomach fluttered.
What if he didn’t believe me?
It wouldn’t be the first time I was accused of lying. It wouldn’t be the first time I lost everything because of my words.
12
“Can’t we talk about this later?” I whispered and pointed to Lavender.
Simon sat down with Lavender in the overstuffed chair by her fireplace. He patted her back, and she settled into him, relaxing despite sniffles coming in hitches.
“For now,” Simon intoned, a curious look on his face. “But you’re not off the hook. As soon as Lala falls asleep, I want to know.”
I crossed my heart with my finger and sat on the bed watching them for a while, his head tilted toward hers, cheek resting on her forehead. He held the delicate child, and I was struck with the duality of his character: the gentle father and the warrior with the spear in the photograph. So tender and so dangerous, at the same time.
My throat ached with the thought of him raising her alone.
He closed his eyes, humming softly to Lavender.
Not wanting to disturb them by getting up, I looked around the room in the dim candlelight. A white iron canopy bed swathed in gauzy pink frills towered in the corner. The room’s walls flanked it with cheerful murals of rolling hills dotted with jumping white bunnies. A yellow sun cast its rays over an ideal land of blooming trees and multi-colored butterflies. I knew what it was to be surrounded with fake frivolity and still feel the chill of loneliness. I thought of her frightened face, and the memory of her terrified screams ripped at my heart.
Lavender’s breathing slowed and eventually deepened.
Simon put her in bed.
We walked out to the hall, candles in hand.
Simon looked at me, puzzled, as he shut her door.
“Why?”
“I’m sorry?”
“Why were you up?” Simon asked. He nodded down the hall, and I walked, wondering where we were going. He was silent, waiting for my answer.
“I left my window open and nearly drowned with the rain coming in.” I tried to make light of the terrible feeling of dread I’d experienced, but my smile must have seemed forced because Simon stopped and regarded me silently, his eyes holding mine.
“What else?”
“What do you mean?”
“There’s more. I can see it in your eyes, Rosetta. What happened?”
“I had a bad dream.” I shifted. “No big deal.”
“That’s not all,
“What’s the matter?” he asked her, but she shook her head, not raising her eyes to look at him.
“She was screaming about monsters,” I said.
“Monsters, Lala?” Simon tried, but Lavender said nothing.
He sighed. “This has been going on for almost two years. I don’t know how to help her. Night terrors, the doctor said, but…” He shook his head, worry etched under his tired eyes.
“She said she was having bad dreams,” I whispered. “She looked so scared.”
Simon reached out, ran his hand along my arm. “Thank you for getting to her so quickly.”
I nodded, my breath caught in my chest. “I was up.”
“Been walking around, have you?”
The question seemed innocent on the surface, but the knowing look on Simon’s face gave me pause.
“Why do you say that?”
“Because you’re covered in dust and spider webs, Rosetta. Where have you been?”
The photograph of him still in my pocket, I couldn’t tell him the truth—that I’d been sneaking around his home and poking into his life without permission. I flashed on the argument with my mother in courthouse hall. Angry words reverberating along the marble walls as the consequences of my choices tore my life apart.
Would finding out what I’d been up to prompt Simon to send me packing? How could I risk losing the only place I had to live?
Simon watched me intently, as if waiting for my answer.
I ran my gaze along his perfect lips and jaw, the feel of his hand on mine still fresh. My stomach fluttered.
What if he didn’t believe me?
It wouldn’t be the first time I was accused of lying. It wouldn’t be the first time I lost everything because of my words.
12
“Can’t we talk about this later?” I whispered and pointed to Lavender.
Simon sat down with Lavender in the overstuffed chair by her fireplace. He patted her back, and she settled into him, relaxing despite sniffles coming in hitches.
“For now,” Simon intoned, a curious look on his face. “But you’re not off the hook. As soon as Lala falls asleep, I want to know.”
I crossed my heart with my finger and sat on the bed watching them for a while, his head tilted toward hers, cheek resting on her forehead. He held the delicate child, and I was struck with the duality of his character: the gentle father and the warrior with the spear in the photograph. So tender and so dangerous, at the same time.
My throat ached with the thought of him raising her alone.
He closed his eyes, humming softly to Lavender.
Not wanting to disturb them by getting up, I looked around the room in the dim candlelight. A white iron canopy bed swathed in gauzy pink frills towered in the corner. The room’s walls flanked it with cheerful murals of rolling hills dotted with jumping white bunnies. A yellow sun cast its rays over an ideal land of blooming trees and multi-colored butterflies. I knew what it was to be surrounded with fake frivolity and still feel the chill of loneliness. I thought of her frightened face, and the memory of her terrified screams ripped at my heart.
Lavender’s breathing slowed and eventually deepened.
Simon put her in bed.
We walked out to the hall, candles in hand.
Simon looked at me, puzzled, as he shut her door.
“Why?”
“I’m sorry?”
“Why were you up?” Simon asked. He nodded down the hall, and I walked, wondering where we were going. He was silent, waiting for my answer.
“I left my window open and nearly drowned with the rain coming in.” I tried to make light of the terrible feeling of dread I’d experienced, but my smile must have seemed forced because Simon stopped and regarded me silently, his eyes holding mine.
“What else?”
“What do you mean?”
“There’s more. I can see it in your eyes, Rosetta. What happened?”
“I had a bad dream.” I shifted. “No big deal.”
“That’s not all,
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