Cassandra.”
I watched the flames as I explained, their dancing light
making it easier to find the words. “She was worried about him and scared of
him all at the same time. She hated Beatrice for taking her son away from her.
She said sometimes Kratos go a little crazy. So maybe sometimes we don’t. Or
maybe she’s just holding onto hope for her son.”
Billie hadn’t mentioned Cassandra’s statement. She didn’t
believe it possible for me to become like the others. “Being Kratos doesn’t
sound much different than being a Wolf like me or Jason or Matthew, innately
dominant and powerful. We’re different from other Wolves in some ways. It’s
more difficult for us to find balance in our lives.”
“How is it more difficult?” I knew about her internal
struggles of becoming Wolf. She was forcibly bitten, unprepared for the changes
within her. She’d lived without Pack for months before Kathryn found her.
She responded to both the spoken question and the thought.
“It was worse for me because I was made Wolf by force. It would have been more
difficult than most even if I hadn’t been. John became Wolf a few months after
I came to the Pack. It was so much easier for him. He adjusted quickly, leading
a normal life by the time he was two months old. I was a year old before I had
the balance John had. Jason told me it took him six months and Matthew nearly
as long. Wolves like us are led by instinct more than others, and it isn’t easy
to find the balance. We have stronger impulses, and we have to learn to control
them. Matthew’s alive because he’s incredibly powerful and dominant. But he
isn’t whole either. He lost his balance.” I didn’t see much difference between
Matthew and Jason. Billie chuckled at my thought. “Jason has that balance. He
doesn’t like you, so you don’t get to see it very much.”
“I don’t know if it’s the same. If it is, I don’t know what
that balance is for me,” I admitted. The flames danced in front of me and I
studied the way they consumed whatever we fed it. Being Kratos felt like that,
an uncontrollable force that consumed and destroyed everything it touched.
“Maybe if I can accept the good side of being Kratos, I can accept being
Kratos.”
I could feel her gaze on me as I compared myself to the
fire. “You barely know what it means to be Kratos. You barely know what it
means to be a Mage. You haven’t had enough time to sort it out yet.”
“I can’t wait until I sort it out. Beatrice will figure out
I’m still alive soon, and she’ll come for me. When she does I have to be
ready.”
She threw a twig in the fire and it burst into flame. “Don’t
forget the prophecy.”
“What do you mean?” The prophecy about me never strayed far
from my thoughts. A century before my birth, Sages foretold that I would change
the course of destiny for Mages and Wolves. My grandmother, misunderstanding
the meaning, tried to kill me in the womb. My parents died to protect me. Right
after my birth, my mother handed me to a Human stranger and disappeared. I was
adopted into a Human family with no knowledge of my heritage or understanding
of my abilities.
“The prophecy is a heavy burden to carry. I feel how much it
weighs on you. Your choices have an enormous impact on all of us: Wolves,
Mages, Sages, and Humans. The war between Mages and Wolves will continue or end
depending on what we do. We. You carry my matebite now, which should be all the
proof you need. We’re in this together. Kato said I’m part of the prophecy, and
three others are coming to help us. I am the best fighter around and Beta of
the strongest pack in the region. You may not have Pack Status, but you are
Pack in the ways that matter most. We can’t tell our packmates a lot of what’s
going on, but we’re not alone. Not in the slightest.”
“How can you be so optimistic?” I asked skeptically.
She held me tighter and rested her chin on my shoulder.
“I’ve had family or Pack my
I watched the flames as I explained, their dancing light
making it easier to find the words. “She was worried about him and scared of
him all at the same time. She hated Beatrice for taking her son away from her.
She said sometimes Kratos go a little crazy. So maybe sometimes we don’t. Or
maybe she’s just holding onto hope for her son.”
Billie hadn’t mentioned Cassandra’s statement. She didn’t
believe it possible for me to become like the others. “Being Kratos doesn’t
sound much different than being a Wolf like me or Jason or Matthew, innately
dominant and powerful. We’re different from other Wolves in some ways. It’s
more difficult for us to find balance in our lives.”
“How is it more difficult?” I knew about her internal
struggles of becoming Wolf. She was forcibly bitten, unprepared for the changes
within her. She’d lived without Pack for months before Kathryn found her.
She responded to both the spoken question and the thought.
“It was worse for me because I was made Wolf by force. It would have been more
difficult than most even if I hadn’t been. John became Wolf a few months after
I came to the Pack. It was so much easier for him. He adjusted quickly, leading
a normal life by the time he was two months old. I was a year old before I had
the balance John had. Jason told me it took him six months and Matthew nearly
as long. Wolves like us are led by instinct more than others, and it isn’t easy
to find the balance. We have stronger impulses, and we have to learn to control
them. Matthew’s alive because he’s incredibly powerful and dominant. But he
isn’t whole either. He lost his balance.” I didn’t see much difference between
Matthew and Jason. Billie chuckled at my thought. “Jason has that balance. He
doesn’t like you, so you don’t get to see it very much.”
“I don’t know if it’s the same. If it is, I don’t know what
that balance is for me,” I admitted. The flames danced in front of me and I
studied the way they consumed whatever we fed it. Being Kratos felt like that,
an uncontrollable force that consumed and destroyed everything it touched.
“Maybe if I can accept the good side of being Kratos, I can accept being
Kratos.”
I could feel her gaze on me as I compared myself to the
fire. “You barely know what it means to be Kratos. You barely know what it
means to be a Mage. You haven’t had enough time to sort it out yet.”
“I can’t wait until I sort it out. Beatrice will figure out
I’m still alive soon, and she’ll come for me. When she does I have to be
ready.”
She threw a twig in the fire and it burst into flame. “Don’t
forget the prophecy.”
“What do you mean?” The prophecy about me never strayed far
from my thoughts. A century before my birth, Sages foretold that I would change
the course of destiny for Mages and Wolves. My grandmother, misunderstanding
the meaning, tried to kill me in the womb. My parents died to protect me. Right
after my birth, my mother handed me to a Human stranger and disappeared. I was
adopted into a Human family with no knowledge of my heritage or understanding
of my abilities.
“The prophecy is a heavy burden to carry. I feel how much it
weighs on you. Your choices have an enormous impact on all of us: Wolves,
Mages, Sages, and Humans. The war between Mages and Wolves will continue or end
depending on what we do. We. You carry my matebite now, which should be all the
proof you need. We’re in this together. Kato said I’m part of the prophecy, and
three others are coming to help us. I am the best fighter around and Beta of
the strongest pack in the region. You may not have Pack Status, but you are
Pack in the ways that matter most. We can’t tell our packmates a lot of what’s
going on, but we’re not alone. Not in the slightest.”
“How can you be so optimistic?” I asked skeptically.
She held me tighter and rested her chin on my shoulder.
“I’ve had family or Pack my
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