you to go. Stay, please.”
He looked over at me, hiding his emotions. “Maddie, you don’t understand. I can’t be here. I have to go.”
“No, you don’t,” I said with conviction. “I’ll forget everything if it means you won’t enlist.”
Ryder’s eyes slowly moved to my mouth. Leaning toward me, his voice dropped, sending vibrations through me. "Could you really forget last night, Maddie? Because I won’t."
A now familiar flush ran over me. I couldn’t help but wiggle in my seat, feeling need flood my body. I wanted to crawl into his lap and kiss him, beg him to stay. His eyes alone were setting me on fire. A blush warmed my face as pictures flashed in my mind — him touching me, nudging my legs apart, and taking me hard. No, I would never forget.
“What you kids want?”
The Texas drawl of the waitress snapped our attention away from each other, bringing us back to reality. She waited impatiently for us to place our orders, the pen in her hand tapping on her pad of paper.
Ryder turned to her with a friendly smile. The woman seemed to melt under his gaze. I understood the feeling.
After she took our orders and left, Eva started talking nonstop about her date with Brody. I tried to listen. I nodded when I was supposed to and I commented when she expected me to but it was hard to focus on the conversation while trying not to focus on Ryder.
What was I going to do? How did you stay friends with someone you had sex with? He was right — I couldn’t forget last night. The memory would always be lingering between us, waiting to bring me to my knees without warning. How were we going to get past that?
Maybe he was right. Maybe it had been a mistake. I loved him and that frightened me. But not having him as a friend frightened me more.
~~~~
Back at the apartment, I walked out of my bedroom ready to go for a run. I needed a few miles of mindless running to clear my mind. Looking down at my Ipod, searching for the perfect song to run to, I almost bumped into Ryder. He was standing in the hallway, talking on his phone. His expression was grave as he held the phone to his ear and glanced down at me.
I skirted around him, putting my earplugs in and heading for the front door. Halfway there, my phone chirped in my hand.
Ben’s face lit up the screen. I really didn’t want to answer but I knew he would call over and over until I did.
“Hello, sweetheart,” his voice said, sounding genuine and happy.
“Hey, Ben.”
Why was he calling me sweetheart? It seemed so endearing before but now it graded on my nerves. And why was he calling me anyway?
When he heard Ben’s name, Ryder’s head whipped around, looking at me sharply. Eva also glanced up from her magazine to watch me warily from the couch. I was uncomfortable with the stares but I refused to be intimidated. Ryder had no right to be jealous. He made that very clear when he said there was nothing between us.
“So I know we broke up but I wanted to see you tonight,” Ben said.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Ben. We’re over,” I said, glancing at Ryder. His eyes never left mine as he said goodbye to whoever he was on the phone with and walked further into the living room.
“At least tell me where you will be tonight,” Ben said.
Before I could give him a vague answer, the call dropped, leaving only silence. I hung up, thankful for the bad reception. It saved me from trying to explain again that it was over between us.
Ryder’s eyes were cold as they watched me. I could practically see the rage rolling off of him in waves. He didn’t say anything but turned and walked to the kitchen, slapping the door open a little too hard.
“Someone’s jealous,” Eva said as she went back to flipping through her magazine. "Interesting."
This time, I didn’t disagree with her.
Chapter Ten
I leaned closer to the mirror and applied some “Pink Afterglow” lip–gloss. The name was appropriate for the way I felt but I tried not to
He looked over at me, hiding his emotions. “Maddie, you don’t understand. I can’t be here. I have to go.”
“No, you don’t,” I said with conviction. “I’ll forget everything if it means you won’t enlist.”
Ryder’s eyes slowly moved to my mouth. Leaning toward me, his voice dropped, sending vibrations through me. "Could you really forget last night, Maddie? Because I won’t."
A now familiar flush ran over me. I couldn’t help but wiggle in my seat, feeling need flood my body. I wanted to crawl into his lap and kiss him, beg him to stay. His eyes alone were setting me on fire. A blush warmed my face as pictures flashed in my mind — him touching me, nudging my legs apart, and taking me hard. No, I would never forget.
“What you kids want?”
The Texas drawl of the waitress snapped our attention away from each other, bringing us back to reality. She waited impatiently for us to place our orders, the pen in her hand tapping on her pad of paper.
Ryder turned to her with a friendly smile. The woman seemed to melt under his gaze. I understood the feeling.
After she took our orders and left, Eva started talking nonstop about her date with Brody. I tried to listen. I nodded when I was supposed to and I commented when she expected me to but it was hard to focus on the conversation while trying not to focus on Ryder.
What was I going to do? How did you stay friends with someone you had sex with? He was right — I couldn’t forget last night. The memory would always be lingering between us, waiting to bring me to my knees without warning. How were we going to get past that?
Maybe he was right. Maybe it had been a mistake. I loved him and that frightened me. But not having him as a friend frightened me more.
~~~~
Back at the apartment, I walked out of my bedroom ready to go for a run. I needed a few miles of mindless running to clear my mind. Looking down at my Ipod, searching for the perfect song to run to, I almost bumped into Ryder. He was standing in the hallway, talking on his phone. His expression was grave as he held the phone to his ear and glanced down at me.
I skirted around him, putting my earplugs in and heading for the front door. Halfway there, my phone chirped in my hand.
Ben’s face lit up the screen. I really didn’t want to answer but I knew he would call over and over until I did.
“Hello, sweetheart,” his voice said, sounding genuine and happy.
“Hey, Ben.”
Why was he calling me sweetheart? It seemed so endearing before but now it graded on my nerves. And why was he calling me anyway?
When he heard Ben’s name, Ryder’s head whipped around, looking at me sharply. Eva also glanced up from her magazine to watch me warily from the couch. I was uncomfortable with the stares but I refused to be intimidated. Ryder had no right to be jealous. He made that very clear when he said there was nothing between us.
“So I know we broke up but I wanted to see you tonight,” Ben said.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Ben. We’re over,” I said, glancing at Ryder. His eyes never left mine as he said goodbye to whoever he was on the phone with and walked further into the living room.
“At least tell me where you will be tonight,” Ben said.
Before I could give him a vague answer, the call dropped, leaving only silence. I hung up, thankful for the bad reception. It saved me from trying to explain again that it was over between us.
Ryder’s eyes were cold as they watched me. I could practically see the rage rolling off of him in waves. He didn’t say anything but turned and walked to the kitchen, slapping the door open a little too hard.
“Someone’s jealous,” Eva said as she went back to flipping through her magazine. "Interesting."
This time, I didn’t disagree with her.
Chapter Ten
I leaned closer to the mirror and applied some “Pink Afterglow” lip–gloss. The name was appropriate for the way I felt but I tried not to
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