be good money.”
“But how do they—you know—manage?”
“They film in short takes and watch straight porn to stay hard. And swallow enough Viagra to kill an elephant.”
“Huh.” Robert paused while Brandon turned Kevin around and bent him over the massage table. After a quick cutaway to Kevin’s happy face, the shot went wide again as they were suddenly fucking, thanks to the magic of cinema. “Is this common knowledge?”
“I don’t know,” Liam said. “Some porn studios, like this one, specialize in the fantasy of turning a straight guy gay.”
“Is that one of your fantasies?”
Liam hesitated. “Are you asking the porn me or the real-life me?”
“Either. Both.”
“Then…yes and no. In real life, I know it never happens. Learned that the hard way.”
“You mean with Tom?”
Liam swallowed. This was the first time that name had been mentioned since he and Robert had become…whatever they were now.
“Tom’s not straight,” Robert said. “Just like I’m not straight.”
“I know that,” Liam snapped. “I wasn’t talking about either of you.” He checked the computer’s clock. “I won’t have time to watch the whole thing. The Scotland-Ireland match is tomorrow, and there are already loads of Irish tourists pouring in. So I need to leave for work early.”
“Uh-huh.” Robert sounded distant, perhaps entranced with Brandon and Kevin. Liam remembered what it was like discovering gay porn. When he was younger, he’d consumed it all, hoping to learn new sex secrets. The biggest secret, of course, was that porn got a lot of stuff wrong.
Then Robert spoke softly. “I’m not like Brandon.”
Liam felt himself stiffen at the sound of Robert’s dreamlike voice. He began to stroke his cock again through his sleep trousers, only half-watching the actors. “How so, mate?”
“You know.” Robert’s voice softened further. “I’d bottom.”
Liam’s prick gave a swift jerk, as though ready to unfasten itself from his body and hop on the Number 60 bus to accommodate Robert this moment.
“You still there?” Robert asked.
“Sorry. I just almost came when you said that. The thought of…”
“The thought of what?” Robert spoke low and smooth now. “The thought of fucking me?”
God yes. Yes yes yes. The idea of being someone’s first—anyone’s first—turned Liam on to no end. But to be Robert’s? To give such soul-shattering pleasure to the most important man in his life?
It would rip Liam to shreds. Each of those shreds would fall straight into Robert’s hands. And if he ever left, he’d take every piece of Liam with him.
So as much as he wanted to lose himself inside Robert, and have Robert lost inside him, it was too great a risk to take. That was one border they could never cross.
“Liam?”
“Aye. I’m just—I’m having lots of thoughts.” He tried to focus on the screen in front of him rather than the images in his head. The actors were still fucking on the massage table, but now they were face-to-face, Brandon holding Kevin’s ankles, spreading his legs wide as he thrust into him. “Christ, look at those abs.”
“I know,” Robert said. “The way his whole body ripples every time he moves? I wish I could watch it in slow motion.”
“I wish I could watch it with you.” Och, that came out wrong. It sounded so romantic.
“You are watching it with me,” Robert said.
“I mean sitting beside you. And by ‘beside you,’ I mean on your face.”
Robert laughed. “Forwards or backwards?”
“Does it matter?”
“Nah. Either way your balls are in my mouth.”
Fuck. Liam shoved down his sleep trousers, then lay back on his pillows, closing his eyes to Brandon and Kevin and opening his ears to Robert. Just for today, he’d live in this fantasy world, where nothing could ever tear them apart. “Tell me more.”
C HAPTER N INE
“F IRST RULE OF center-backs?” Liam shouted.
“Don’t fuck up!” Robert answered on cue.
“But how do they—you know—manage?”
“They film in short takes and watch straight porn to stay hard. And swallow enough Viagra to kill an elephant.”
“Huh.” Robert paused while Brandon turned Kevin around and bent him over the massage table. After a quick cutaway to Kevin’s happy face, the shot went wide again as they were suddenly fucking, thanks to the magic of cinema. “Is this common knowledge?”
“I don’t know,” Liam said. “Some porn studios, like this one, specialize in the fantasy of turning a straight guy gay.”
“Is that one of your fantasies?”
Liam hesitated. “Are you asking the porn me or the real-life me?”
“Either. Both.”
“Then…yes and no. In real life, I know it never happens. Learned that the hard way.”
“You mean with Tom?”
Liam swallowed. This was the first time that name had been mentioned since he and Robert had become…whatever they were now.
“Tom’s not straight,” Robert said. “Just like I’m not straight.”
“I know that,” Liam snapped. “I wasn’t talking about either of you.” He checked the computer’s clock. “I won’t have time to watch the whole thing. The Scotland-Ireland match is tomorrow, and there are already loads of Irish tourists pouring in. So I need to leave for work early.”
“Uh-huh.” Robert sounded distant, perhaps entranced with Brandon and Kevin. Liam remembered what it was like discovering gay porn. When he was younger, he’d consumed it all, hoping to learn new sex secrets. The biggest secret, of course, was that porn got a lot of stuff wrong.
Then Robert spoke softly. “I’m not like Brandon.”
Liam felt himself stiffen at the sound of Robert’s dreamlike voice. He began to stroke his cock again through his sleep trousers, only half-watching the actors. “How so, mate?”
“You know.” Robert’s voice softened further. “I’d bottom.”
Liam’s prick gave a swift jerk, as though ready to unfasten itself from his body and hop on the Number 60 bus to accommodate Robert this moment.
“You still there?” Robert asked.
“Sorry. I just almost came when you said that. The thought of…”
“The thought of what?” Robert spoke low and smooth now. “The thought of fucking me?”
God yes. Yes yes yes. The idea of being someone’s first—anyone’s first—turned Liam on to no end. But to be Robert’s? To give such soul-shattering pleasure to the most important man in his life?
It would rip Liam to shreds. Each of those shreds would fall straight into Robert’s hands. And if he ever left, he’d take every piece of Liam with him.
So as much as he wanted to lose himself inside Robert, and have Robert lost inside him, it was too great a risk to take. That was one border they could never cross.
“Liam?”
“Aye. I’m just—I’m having lots of thoughts.” He tried to focus on the screen in front of him rather than the images in his head. The actors were still fucking on the massage table, but now they were face-to-face, Brandon holding Kevin’s ankles, spreading his legs wide as he thrust into him. “Christ, look at those abs.”
“I know,” Robert said. “The way his whole body ripples every time he moves? I wish I could watch it in slow motion.”
“I wish I could watch it with you.” Och, that came out wrong. It sounded so romantic.
“You are watching it with me,” Robert said.
“I mean sitting beside you. And by ‘beside you,’ I mean on your face.”
Robert laughed. “Forwards or backwards?”
“Does it matter?”
“Nah. Either way your balls are in my mouth.”
Fuck. Liam shoved down his sleep trousers, then lay back on his pillows, closing his eyes to Brandon and Kevin and opening his ears to Robert. Just for today, he’d live in this fantasy world, where nothing could ever tear them apart. “Tell me more.”
C HAPTER N INE
“F IRST RULE OF center-backs?” Liam shouted.
“Don’t fuck up!” Robert answered on cue.
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