Place to Belong, a by Lauraine Snelling Page A

this final? What would be wrong with marrying Lucas? He said he loved her, and she knew she loved him, but the problem was the way she loved him. As a brother, not as a husband. And that was a huge problem. Surely that would come with time. She remembered a Romanian couple that performed with the show for several years. It had been an arranged marriage. They had not even met before the wedding, and they were doing all right. Surely so could she.
    She and Lucas could live in Arnett’s house, and that way the brothers could run both spreads effectively.
    All the family would benefit if she would only say yes.
    God, Mavis says to ask you and I have, but I don’t hear any answers. But then, I don’t think I’ve ever heard you answer. Asshe thought about this, she observed that there were people in the Bible who married because it was the best thing, not necessarily for the kind of love she had seen between her mother and father. God had blessed those marriages. Dear God, would you bless this one?
    Would she regret it later?
    She’d not thought about that before. Marriage was forever, but was her assumption true that she could learn to love Lucas forever?
    The look on Ransom’s face when he gave his brother the blessing floated through her mind. Was he doing that out of duty, or did he wholeheartedly believe it? Think, Cassie , or would it be better to stop thinking? Leaning back in the chair with a heavy sigh, she watched the dancing flames. Pictures of her mother and father flashed through her mind. While her parents had always included her in whatever they were doing, she knew they’d rather be together than with anyone else. Close together, touching . . .
    She paused. They had hated to be apart. How many times had she heard her mother say, “Your father will be back in a minute” ? Or an hour. And if longer than that, she touched the locket she always wore with their pictures in it. The treasured locket. Gone now.
    Cassie’s mind would not shut down, so she used a coal from the fireplace to light one of the kerosene lamps. She drew the handkerchief she was hemming from under her failure at knitting and continued the tiny stitches. She had embroidered a monogrammed LE in one corner. Fancy stitching she could do, so these would be her gift to the men on her list—the two Engstroms, Micah, and Mr. Arnett. No, just Arnett. She’d designed—in her mind at least—a reticule for Gretchen and a bookmark with “The joy of the Lord is your strength” on it for Mavis. Something for Runs Like a Deer still eluded her. She should have started months ago.
    A pang of longing ripped into her heart. How her father would have loved bringing his wife and daughter to this place! What a shame that he had never left the show during the off-season and come here, at least for a visit.
    That led to thoughts of the future. What if she joined a show or made guest appearances at shows during the season to make enough money to add to the ranch, not just pay for her own supplies? She’d heard Ransom talk of adding more cattle, and with the joining of the two ranches, there was now enough land to do that. How many acres that meant, she had no idea, but he’d also talked of Appaloosa horses like her father had dreamed of and new machinery—breakdowns were hard on everyone, or so Mavis said.
    Money. So much of life revolved around money, mostly never having enough. Or any at all, in her case. The yard of linen she had purchased to make her Christmas gifts had taken her last cash, but Mavis’s scrap bag did not have what she needed. She knew she could put it on the ranch credit or on her own, but the totals owed were so horrifying already that she couldn’t do it.
    If she were to agree to marry Lucas, would he go along with her ideas? He’d already said he would travel with her and manage her affairs. But would he? Could he? Mavis had stated unequivocally that Lucas