yard. “One day when we were in England, I got up real early and came down into the kitchen, and Daddy was sitting there all dressed up in a suit, drinking a cup of coffee. It was still dark, so it must have been winter. I asked him why he was all dressed up, and he said that he had to rush over to Amsterdam to get Jenny, did I remember Jenny, and bring her back to take care of us, would I like that? Well, I didn’t know, but I knew Holland was across the ocean and farther away than a single day’s trip, so I asked if we were going along, and he said no, Mrs. Frith, the daily woman, was going to look after us during the day. And I said, ‘Well, who’s going to look after us at night?’ and he said, ‘It will only be one night, and this is England, and you are nearly eleven, and Daniel is a big boy, and so I think, if you lockthe doors and draw the curtains, everything will be fine.’ Pretty soon he finished his coffee and got up and gave me a kiss and left, and I don’t know what he was thinking. What if I hadn’t gotten up so early? What if I had just missed him completely?”
“He wasn’t thinking,” says Joe. “He was following his dick to Holland. That’s what Father used to do.”
“Anyway,” Ellen continues, “pretty soon Annie got up, and I got her dressed and then Daniel and you guys, and I thought that Mrs. Frith would come to take us to our school. We were all ready, dressed and fed, and we sort of sat by the door, waiting, for a long time. But Mrs. Frith didn’t get there until about noon, and so by that time everyone was doing other things, and I didn’t say anything to her about it. She was a very cheery woman, Mrs. Frith, but maybe she drank or thought we were odd because we were Americans, because she never asked anything about it, and at one point I said, ‘Did my father say he was going on a trip?’ and she said, ‘Why no, luv,’ and so I just didn’t say another word. She left about five.
“Well, she had made us something to eat—that was one thing she did when she came—and at six o’clock I dished it up, exactly at six o’clock, because Daddy always liked that kind of precision and I had this sense that if I did everything right he would get back quicker—early enough the next day to take us to school. The funny thing was that no one asked where he was, at least none of the younger kids. But Michael and Joe fought like crazy, yelling and pushing each other and crying, from after dinner until about nine-thirty, when I decided it was bedtime. I did just what Daddy said—I pulled the curtains and locked the door and refused to be afraid. Daniel started reading through his entire comicbook collection that he’d brought with him from the States, for about the tenth time, and Annie kept looking at me, but she didn’t say much and I didn’t volunteer anything.
“The next day I let everybody sleep late, but I was looking for him from about dawn. Mrs. Frith came and we were all still in our pyjamas, but she didn’t say anything. She did ask where Daddy was, and I said that he had gone to the hospital very early, and left word that we didn’t have to go to school. I was just very embarrassed that he hadn’t come back. She made us put on our clothes, though. By Friday she was more suspicious, but I made up this long story about how he was coming home right after work to take us to Ireland for a week, and I even said that she could call him at the hospital and ask him if she liked, but I knew she wouldn’t because she was very suspicious of the telephone and hated to call anyone up, especially Daddy, who hated to hear from anyone when he was at work.
“Well, I remember that on Friday I became convinced that he wasn’t coming back, and that I was going to have to figure out a way to take care of everyone and pay for everything—Mrs. Frith, for one. I thought all day about how she got paid on Monday, and that when Monday rolled around I wasn’t going to have anything to
“He wasn’t thinking,” says Joe. “He was following his dick to Holland. That’s what Father used to do.”
“Anyway,” Ellen continues, “pretty soon Annie got up, and I got her dressed and then Daniel and you guys, and I thought that Mrs. Frith would come to take us to our school. We were all ready, dressed and fed, and we sort of sat by the door, waiting, for a long time. But Mrs. Frith didn’t get there until about noon, and so by that time everyone was doing other things, and I didn’t say anything to her about it. She was a very cheery woman, Mrs. Frith, but maybe she drank or thought we were odd because we were Americans, because she never asked anything about it, and at one point I said, ‘Did my father say he was going on a trip?’ and she said, ‘Why no, luv,’ and so I just didn’t say another word. She left about five.
“Well, she had made us something to eat—that was one thing she did when she came—and at six o’clock I dished it up, exactly at six o’clock, because Daddy always liked that kind of precision and I had this sense that if I did everything right he would get back quicker—early enough the next day to take us to school. The funny thing was that no one asked where he was, at least none of the younger kids. But Michael and Joe fought like crazy, yelling and pushing each other and crying, from after dinner until about nine-thirty, when I decided it was bedtime. I did just what Daddy said—I pulled the curtains and locked the door and refused to be afraid. Daniel started reading through his entire comicbook collection that he’d brought with him from the States, for about the tenth time, and Annie kept looking at me, but she didn’t say much and I didn’t volunteer anything.
“The next day I let everybody sleep late, but I was looking for him from about dawn. Mrs. Frith came and we were all still in our pyjamas, but she didn’t say anything. She did ask where Daddy was, and I said that he had gone to the hospital very early, and left word that we didn’t have to go to school. I was just very embarrassed that he hadn’t come back. She made us put on our clothes, though. By Friday she was more suspicious, but I made up this long story about how he was coming home right after work to take us to Ireland for a week, and I even said that she could call him at the hospital and ask him if she liked, but I knew she wouldn’t because she was very suspicious of the telephone and hated to call anyone up, especially Daddy, who hated to hear from anyone when he was at work.
“Well, I remember that on Friday I became convinced that he wasn’t coming back, and that I was going to have to figure out a way to take care of everyone and pay for everything—Mrs. Frith, for one. I thought all day about how she got paid on Monday, and that when Monday rolled around I wasn’t going to have anything to
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