that gives orders, not takes them. In fact,
I hate being told what to do. But for some reason, when I see you, I want to
fall at your feet and do whatever you wish. I don’t understand.”
In an instant the princess look was replaced with one of
compassion and her posture softened. Mistress Jasmina disappeared and Dr.
Jovanovich was there, sliding her chair closer and placing her hand over his.
The heat of her palm against the back of his hand made his
breath catch at the same time his heart rate slowed behind his ribs. Magic was
in her touch and he gripped her fingers to capture the calming sensation.
“What you’re experiencing is perfectly normal. Even in this
day and age, society tries to dictate what is considered strength and what is
weak. What is male and what is female, and the reality is that it’s different
for everyone. Being a submissive is not a sign of weakness. And being a
submissive does not mean you are any less manly. Believe me, Captain. You are
all man, and once I get my hands on you, you will never question just how much
of a man you are.”
Her fingers tightened around his and he felt his lips curl
to match her smile. “I didn’t really get what you meant when you said it wasn’t
about sex. Then I saw you with that whip and got more confused. I should have
been horrified to see that guy humiliated that way.”
“But you weren’t.”
“No. I don’t know what I was, exactly, but I was…”
Fascinated. Turned-on. Shocked. All of the above and more. “I don’t know how to
explain it.”
“You and I work in a similar field. People rely on our
leadership, our ability to maintain in control during chaotic situations, to
make life-or-death decisions every day. To live with that level of stress day
in and day out takes a toll on the human spirit. No one can sustain that
lifestyle forever. So to compensate, a person will turn to different vices to
find a balance. Some may choose exercise, or they may turn to alcohol or drugs
or begin overeating. As I said, it’s different for every person. In our case, I
refocus my need for control in another direction, and your subconscious seeks
to disengage altogether. I think you’ll find that if you feed that need to give
up your control, when it comes time to step back into that leadership role, you
will be able to do so from a fresh perspective and with the knowledge that you
will have a haven to step away from the madness. Sometimes that thought alone
brings people great comfort.”
What she said made so much sense, he felt the angst of the
last few days dissipate. The sensation almost made him giddy and a chuckle
burst from his lips. He sandwiched her hand between his. “So you’re saying I’m
not crazy?”
“Did you really think you were?”
“Sometimes. But I guess it would be a sign of craziness if I
didn’t question my reactions.”
“I suppose so.” Her lashes fluttered in that distinctly
feminine way that was sexy without being cutesy.
“So what made you become Mistress Jasmina?”
She glanced away and her tongue flicked over her lips as she
reached for her wine. The pace with which she lifted the glass and took a slow
sip made him wonder if he already hit upon a delicate topic.
Just as he wondered if she was going to answer the question,
she spoke, “I come from a very old-school family. Eastern European. The men
ruled the castle, women were—are—expected to stay home and raise the children.
I fought against that tradition in the ways a young girl does. Staying out
late, going to college, moving out on my own the moment I was old enough. But I
never thought of myself as dominant. I had boyfriends, lovers, nothing really
serious. And while the sex was never bad, it wasn’t spectacular. The
relationships just fizzled out and whenever the parting came, I was never
crushed by it.
“I was in my first year of residency, and a man came in with
symptoms of cardiac arrest. We went to work on him immediately. He made it
through
I hate being told what to do. But for some reason, when I see you, I want to
fall at your feet and do whatever you wish. I don’t understand.”
In an instant the princess look was replaced with one of
compassion and her posture softened. Mistress Jasmina disappeared and Dr.
Jovanovich was there, sliding her chair closer and placing her hand over his.
The heat of her palm against the back of his hand made his
breath catch at the same time his heart rate slowed behind his ribs. Magic was
in her touch and he gripped her fingers to capture the calming sensation.
“What you’re experiencing is perfectly normal. Even in this
day and age, society tries to dictate what is considered strength and what is
weak. What is male and what is female, and the reality is that it’s different
for everyone. Being a submissive is not a sign of weakness. And being a
submissive does not mean you are any less manly. Believe me, Captain. You are
all man, and once I get my hands on you, you will never question just how much
of a man you are.”
Her fingers tightened around his and he felt his lips curl
to match her smile. “I didn’t really get what you meant when you said it wasn’t
about sex. Then I saw you with that whip and got more confused. I should have
been horrified to see that guy humiliated that way.”
“But you weren’t.”
“No. I don’t know what I was, exactly, but I was…”
Fascinated. Turned-on. Shocked. All of the above and more. “I don’t know how to
explain it.”
“You and I work in a similar field. People rely on our
leadership, our ability to maintain in control during chaotic situations, to
make life-or-death decisions every day. To live with that level of stress day
in and day out takes a toll on the human spirit. No one can sustain that
lifestyle forever. So to compensate, a person will turn to different vices to
find a balance. Some may choose exercise, or they may turn to alcohol or drugs
or begin overeating. As I said, it’s different for every person. In our case, I
refocus my need for control in another direction, and your subconscious seeks
to disengage altogether. I think you’ll find that if you feed that need to give
up your control, when it comes time to step back into that leadership role, you
will be able to do so from a fresh perspective and with the knowledge that you
will have a haven to step away from the madness. Sometimes that thought alone
brings people great comfort.”
What she said made so much sense, he felt the angst of the
last few days dissipate. The sensation almost made him giddy and a chuckle
burst from his lips. He sandwiched her hand between his. “So you’re saying I’m
not crazy?”
“Did you really think you were?”
“Sometimes. But I guess it would be a sign of craziness if I
didn’t question my reactions.”
“I suppose so.” Her lashes fluttered in that distinctly
feminine way that was sexy without being cutesy.
“So what made you become Mistress Jasmina?”
She glanced away and her tongue flicked over her lips as she
reached for her wine. The pace with which she lifted the glass and took a slow
sip made him wonder if he already hit upon a delicate topic.
Just as he wondered if she was going to answer the question,
she spoke, “I come from a very old-school family. Eastern European. The men
ruled the castle, women were—are—expected to stay home and raise the children.
I fought against that tradition in the ways a young girl does. Staying out
late, going to college, moving out on my own the moment I was old enough. But I
never thought of myself as dominant. I had boyfriends, lovers, nothing really
serious. And while the sex was never bad, it wasn’t spectacular. The
relationships just fizzled out and whenever the parting came, I was never
crushed by it.
“I was in my first year of residency, and a man came in with
symptoms of cardiac arrest. We went to work on him immediately. He made it
through
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