‘dry run’ to see if everything worked. Unfortunately, the noise of the cistern could be heard clearly from the nearest seats and the officials were anxious not to cause any embarrassment. So engineers were summoned and the offending water was drained and replaced with straw, which proved to be silent. As it happened, the retiring room was not required after all, but an enterprising England player decided to ensure his place in sporting history by christening the loo himself,long after everyone else had left. His name has never been revealed.
The Royal Family has its own attitude to addressing staff. Police officers (of whatever rank), Pages (with the exception of Her Majesty’s personal Page) chauffeurs and older servants are called by their surname. Footmen and valets are known by their Christian name. One young footman, who mistakenly thought this was an invitation to friendliness, replied to one of The Queen’s children using his Christian name. By the time the Royal had recovered from the shock, the footman had been removed from royal service and was never heard of again.
Thirty-two porters and non-domestic cleaners are employed at Buckingham Palace, whose duties include moving furniture – and items from the Royal Collection that are valuable but too heavy for one of the footmen or maids to handle. They also help prepare the State Apartments for official functions. It was a team of these porters who manhandled the sections of the giant dining table into the State Ballroom for the dinner party that the Prince of Wales gave on the evening of the wedding of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge. And they then had to dismantle it the following morning.
Once a year the porters assemble furniture and works of art in Frogmore House, in the grounds of Windsor Castle. The house is no longer used as a royal residence, but the Duke of Edinburgh gives informal dinner parties in its delightful surroundings when the house takes on the splendour of its past history. Frogmore has been open to the public for a specifiednumber of days each year since 1990, so the property has to be maintained in an excellent state of repair.
There is still one department within the Royal Household that is a throwback to previous reigns. It is part of the Lord Chamberlain’s Office and is run by someone with the title of State Invitations Assistant. Based in an office in St James’s Palace, a small team of nine ladies who go by the quaint description of ‘Temporary Lady Clerks’ are responsible for writing in longhand over 40,000 invitations a year. These ‘Temps’, some of whom have been doing the job for over twenty-five years, are the most discreet of women and very few people even know of their existence. Throughout the year they sit and write out the invitations to the four Garden Parties – they are actually called Afternoon Parties – The Queen gives every year: three at Buckingham Palace and one at the Palace of Holyrood House in Edinburgh. The ladies all use fountain pens; they wouldn’t dream of using a ballpoint and the invitations are always addressed to the lady of the house, never the husband. This is because the Garden Parties have replaced the old-style Coming Out Balls at which their mothers presented highborn debutantes to the Sovereign. These days, husbands, or partners may accompany their spouse and also a daughter aged eighteen is welcome, but not a son. This is not an occasion for sons, but primarily for daughters.
The staff (they hate that word) in the Garden Party Office could quite easily make considerable sums of money if they were corruptible, as many women (and their husbands) would gladly pay whatever it cost toobtain an invitation to Buckingham Palace. But the assistant and his team have never been tempted. And if anyone even offered a bribe, his or her name would immediately appear on the ‘Black List’ and they would never be invited. The ‘Black List’ is a sinister-sounding record of those who have
The Royal Family has its own attitude to addressing staff. Police officers (of whatever rank), Pages (with the exception of Her Majesty’s personal Page) chauffeurs and older servants are called by their surname. Footmen and valets are known by their Christian name. One young footman, who mistakenly thought this was an invitation to friendliness, replied to one of The Queen’s children using his Christian name. By the time the Royal had recovered from the shock, the footman had been removed from royal service and was never heard of again.
Thirty-two porters and non-domestic cleaners are employed at Buckingham Palace, whose duties include moving furniture – and items from the Royal Collection that are valuable but too heavy for one of the footmen or maids to handle. They also help prepare the State Apartments for official functions. It was a team of these porters who manhandled the sections of the giant dining table into the State Ballroom for the dinner party that the Prince of Wales gave on the evening of the wedding of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge. And they then had to dismantle it the following morning.
Once a year the porters assemble furniture and works of art in Frogmore House, in the grounds of Windsor Castle. The house is no longer used as a royal residence, but the Duke of Edinburgh gives informal dinner parties in its delightful surroundings when the house takes on the splendour of its past history. Frogmore has been open to the public for a specifiednumber of days each year since 1990, so the property has to be maintained in an excellent state of repair.
There is still one department within the Royal Household that is a throwback to previous reigns. It is part of the Lord Chamberlain’s Office and is run by someone with the title of State Invitations Assistant. Based in an office in St James’s Palace, a small team of nine ladies who go by the quaint description of ‘Temporary Lady Clerks’ are responsible for writing in longhand over 40,000 invitations a year. These ‘Temps’, some of whom have been doing the job for over twenty-five years, are the most discreet of women and very few people even know of their existence. Throughout the year they sit and write out the invitations to the four Garden Parties – they are actually called Afternoon Parties – The Queen gives every year: three at Buckingham Palace and one at the Palace of Holyrood House in Edinburgh. The ladies all use fountain pens; they wouldn’t dream of using a ballpoint and the invitations are always addressed to the lady of the house, never the husband. This is because the Garden Parties have replaced the old-style Coming Out Balls at which their mothers presented highborn debutantes to the Sovereign. These days, husbands, or partners may accompany their spouse and also a daughter aged eighteen is welcome, but not a son. This is not an occasion for sons, but primarily for daughters.
The staff (they hate that word) in the Garden Party Office could quite easily make considerable sums of money if they were corruptible, as many women (and their husbands) would gladly pay whatever it cost toobtain an invitation to Buckingham Palace. But the assistant and his team have never been tempted. And if anyone even offered a bribe, his or her name would immediately appear on the ‘Black List’ and they would never be invited. The ‘Black List’ is a sinister-sounding record of those who have
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