Nobody's Child by Austin Boyd Page A

what I’d planned to say tonight,” he said, clinging to a post, eyes focused somewhere in the distant dark. “But …”
    Laura Ann’s heart leapt with his first words, then died in the silence that followed.
    â€œYou went to Morgantown in the middle of that insane snowstorm back in February. Remember? You told me then too that it was female stuff. I prayed all day, Laura Ann. Prayed for whatever it was that you felt you couldn’t share with me, in hopes you’d be healed or cared for.”
    Ian never moved from his post. “We’ve walked through some hard times since Christmas, but we’ve been together every day, even if I had to work late. There was no doubt in my mind that we’re right for each other—no doubt until today.”
    Until today?
    Laura Ann’s heart raced, every fiber straining for her to lift a hand, move a foot, or say something to stop his next words before he could utter them. She turned to face Ian. She moved too late.
    â€œWhen I realized you were on the ground — “ His voicecracked and he turned away, drawing in another deep breath. “When I saw you there, I thought I’d lost you. I drove like a madman across the field to get to you.” He wiped at his own eyes and walked away to the end of the porch.
    Laura Ann followed, holding her distance. Wars raged inside her to run and wrap her arms about him.
    Ian turned back to face her, welling tears reflecting in the dim light from the living room window. “I didn’t plan to confront you with this, but the stranger you act, the more distant you become. This secret of yours—what you call ‘female stuff’ — is coming between us.”
    He drew in a deep breath and stepped toward her, raising a hand in her direction. “I love you, Laura Ann.” He stood there, waiting for her response, then continued. “But I hate secrets.” He coughed, and then added, “I have my reasons.”
    â€œThink, then speak,” Daddy used to say. She measured her next words, desperate to scream them.
    â€œI’m sorry, Ian—but it’s my business.”
    â€œIt’s
our
business, Laura Ann. Whatever this is about. I’ve been here every day helping you to keep the farm afloat.” He paused. “I thought we were a team.”
    â€œWe are. We were —,” she said, choking on the last word.
    â€œWere?” he blurted out. His footsteps were the only sound in the silence that followed. He approached and put a hand on her shoulder, tugging at her to turn.
    Laura Ann backed away, bumping into the porch rail. She could run no further, withering in the face of the first anger she’d seen from him in months.
    â€œThe farm —,” she began.
    Ian cut her off. “No! I’ve heard all about your dreams, and know just what problems we’re facing.
We
are facing.”
    â€œI’d do anything — “
    â€œOld news, Laura Ann. Tell me something I don’t know.You’re going to the doctor, or at least you say you are. I want to know what ails you — and that’s where I can’t tolerate secrecy.” He lowered his eyes a moment, and then looked back up. “I’m sorry. I just want to help.”
    Ian backed away from her, gritting teeth that clamped down on words she was sure he’d swallowed. “I’ve hidden nothing from you, Laura Ann. And I don’t ever intend to.” He gulped and looked away.
    Whip-poor-will.
The bird cried out, the echo of its song muffled in the fog. No bird called back. Solitary. Isolated. Alone.
    She gripped the porch rail behind her, backed into a corner she could not escape. “I’m not exactly sick, Ian.”
    â€œThen?”
    â€œA gynecologist in Morgantown has me on some strong medications to regulate my cycle.”
    â€œThat’s all?” he asked, a nervous laugh mixed in the question. He laid his hands on her