Nine Lives by Erin Lee Page A

feel like I should warn them. I want to say, “stop at three!” Joseph and Missy live just down the road and I don’t know what I would do without them. While he’s busy himself, he does try to help out when he can.
    Noelle will be here soon. I’m hoping Laina will agree to watch Mary and Jeremiah again. Caroline is just down the road and is a trusted adult. That should be fine with the stupid probation office. I’m so tired of being locked down to that kid all the time. Normal teenagers don’t need babysitting. I understand why they want the hand-holding babysitting. I can’t say it doesn’t worry me that Tyler will be crawling through the woods toward our house the moment I leave. At this point, though, how can I stop him? I’m tempted to call her probation officer to tell him about the hat I found in the house. Instead, I’m going to do what Hope suggested, and hold it as my ace card if I need it. If her probation officer finds out that she’s been sneaking Tyler over again, she’ll go right back to a residential home. Then again, he’ll lecture me for leaving her alone. Oh well. He’s clearly never raised teenage girls. Maybe Laina back in placement will give me the break I need. Faith always behaves better with Laina out of the picture.
    I call the kids. Faith mopes into the kitchen with Mary hopping happily behind her.
    “Where are Jeremiah and Laina?” I ask, ignoring Faith’s irritated expression.
    “Jeremiah is jumping on that stupid trampoline. And I’m not Laina’s keeper,” Faith says. “I’m starving, what’s there to eat?”
    “Cold cuts in the fridge. Make a sandwich,” I say. “Mary, go find Laina and tell her Mommy needs to talk to her.”
    Mary marches off.
    I grab the newspaper off the kitchen table and head to my room to wait for Noelle. I don’t want to be in the kitchen while Faith gives me dirty looks and eats her sandwich. I’ve learned it’s best to avoid her. I can’t stand looking at her cuts, and she refuses to cover her arms in the house lately. It’s like she’s screaming, “Look at me! Look at the pain I’m in!” and “Gotcha! There’s nothing you can do to help me.”
    I have about a half hour to make a list of apartments. I haven’t had time to do much apartment hunting, and now that I’m resigned to the idea of losing the house, I know I need to get motivated. But instead of looking for low-income housing, I find myself drawn to community ads about mental wellness, therapy, and shelters for at-risk kids. I swallow the guilt I feel about wanting Laina and Faith out of my life, for now anyway, and flip the page.
    “Laina!” I call, wondering why eager Mary hasn’t produced her yet.
    The house is quiet except for the sound of Faith’s shower in the upstairs bathroom. She was probably pissed about me being out of ham and changed her mind about eating. She hates bologna. I smirk to myself. I don’t bother checking the time. I know she’ll be in there a good half hour. I’m trying to find ways to avoid being aggravated with the girls any more than necessary. She has never cared about the cost of hot water. None of them have. It’s not just a Faith thing. I look out my window to watch a happy Jeremiah bouncing on the trampoline. I cringe as he jumps too close to the edge but remind myself that soon I’ll be donating that trampoline to the church for their annual bizarre.
    “Ma! I’m here!” Noelle yells from the kitchen.
    I smile, throw on my sneakers, and run down to greet her. We hug and I ask her how she’s doing. Fresh out of nursing school, she’s been studying for the boards. She reminds me of a younger version of my case manager, Juliet— hoping to save the world but independent-minded enough to know that might take some creative thinking. Lately, Noelle hasn’t been around as much as usual. She says she needs a quiet place to study and our house isn’t it. I’ve missed her more than I realized and wonder why she’s really staying