My Zombie Honeymoon: Love in the Age of Zombies Book One by James K. Evans Page A

toward the street—but not behind the gate. As I hurried toward my house I heard Michelle scream.
    I turned around and saw a zombie attacking her. It had been hidden behind the gate. It was a female zombie—or used to be a female. The clothes were soiled, and in tatters. Her blouse was nearly torn off, exposing a gaping wound in her side. One shrunken breast flopped around as she tried to grab Michelle, her desiccated nipple the color of a dark bruise. The bra hung limply around her waist.
    Michelle stumbled, the gun falling out of her belt.
    She had the box between her and the zombie. It went into a craze, smelling her blood I guess, and began making the loud snarling, rasping sound. It was desperately reaching out, trying to get her, snapping its teeth and clawing her.
    Despite the zombie’s advanced stage of decomposition, it still had a lot of weight and strength, knocking Michelle backwards onto the ground. The box and the zombie fell with her. As they hit the ground, the box crumpled and with the zombie grabbed hold of Michelle’s hair, stretching her head and neck to bite her.
    “ Kevin! Help me!! ” she shrieked. I was already in motion, having dropped my box, and was going for the gun she’d dropped. I picked it up, pointed it at the zombie and pulled the trigger. The gun went off, making a not-so-neat hole in the fence, just a few inches above Michelle’s head. Michelle’s eyes went even wider as she yelled “ Shoot IT! Shoot IT!! NOT ME!! ”
    This time I fired at the zombie’s back. The impact of the bullet caused the zombie to lurch, but it continued grasping for Michelle’s neck. I aimed again, this time for the head, making sure Michelle was not behind it. I pulled the trigger, and instantly half of the zombie’s head exploded, showering Michelle in dead tissue, brains, and bits of bone. The zombie collapsed, no longer moving. Michelle pushed the zombie off, then scrambled to her feet, screaming, “ Kevin! Behind you !!”
    Turning around, I saw two zombies about fifteen feet away, stumbling toward us. They had smelled us. Or heard us. Probably both.
    I shot at the first one but missed. “Kevin! Wait!” Michelle shouted. Next thing I knew she was peeling the gun from my hands, making it look easy as she shot the first zombie in the head. As the zombie fell , she shot the other one.
    The sound of the shots echoed around the neighborhood, and we heard a small ensemble of rasps in response. Just then, a very tall zombie came around the corner of the house. He was wearing a t-shirt and no underwear. The zombie’s pecker was shrunken and nearly black.
    “ Grab your stuff! Let’s go!! ” I shouted, picking up my box. Michelle shoved the inert zombie off her, then picked up her crumpled box, smearing herself with more zombie detritus. As she and I ran for the door, the zombie moved closer. It was only about ten feet away, with another half-dozen more a few feet behind it.
    We made it through the door, slammed it closed, and bolted it. As the zombies began to pound and scrape at the door, trying to get at the fresh meat and blood they smelled (or sensed), we leaned back against the wall. We were both breathing heavily, both of us under an adrenalin rush.
    “Let’s get downstairs,” I said, “maybe they’ll lose interest and wander off.”
    We headed down the stairs, closing the trap door behind us. Even with the trap door closed, I could hear them pounding and scraping at the door.
    Michelle looked at me with a wildly desperate look in her eyes. “Kevin,” she pleaded, “I’m covered in zombie guts! I’ve got to get cleaned up!” Her hair was matted with zombie brains. Her face and neck were splattered. In fact, she was nothing but a mess. “Ugh, it stinks!”
    “Don’t worry about how you look or smell,” I said, “at least you didn’t get bit!”
    “I don’t give a damn how I look ! I have zombie guts on me, Kevin! I could get infected!!”
    I hadn’t thought of that. I quickly