My Life as the Ugly Stepsister by Juli Alexander Page B

strength.”
    I was about to forgive him when he added, “I didn’t hurt Buddy did I?”
    “Jerk,” I snapped, sending the pillow sailing back toward his face.
    He laughed, loud.
    “Stop,” he said. “Stop it. You’re going to get us busted.”
    “Then quit being a prick.”
    “Ooh. The girl’s got a mouth on her. I’ll stop,” he said, but I could tell he was still fighting a laugh.
    “Good night,” I said with what I hoped was authority.
    “Night,” he said.

 
     
    Chapter Nine
     
     
    With makeup, sometimes less is more. Or less is less awful.
    —Ally’s Brutal Teen Truths
     
    On Saturday morning, the getaway was more hectic because his family was already stirring when the dogs woke us up. I slipped back into bed at my house and slept til noon. It wasn’t easy sleeping outside all the time. Caroline woke me up to inform me she was headed to the mall.
    “What are you doing today?”
    “I’m supposed to go over to Madison’s.”
    “Well, get up then. The day’s a’wasting.”
    Did she just say a’wasting? “Okay.”
    “I have time to do your makeup before I go,” Caroline said. “But only if you hurry and jump in the shower now.”
    I was interested to see what her skills could do for me. “Going,” I said climbing out of bed.
    I showered and Caroline got set up in her room. You’d think she was performing brain surgery or something as seriously as she was taking it. She brought in two extra lamps.
    My hair was still wet, but she informed me that she couldn’t wait any longer.
    Then she got out all these brushes and things. I usually, okay always, just use the cheap little brush that comes with the blush. I mean, that’s what it’s for, right? Not Caroline. She had an arsenal of application tools.
    First she used toner on my face with a cotton ball. I would have used a tissue, if I had toner. She told me how to shade to make my nose not look so wide. Hello! My nose wasn’t wide. I had no problems with any part of my face except my eyes, which were too small. But apparently, I had serious nose issues too. Who knew?
    Thirty minutes later, I had more makeup on than Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Caribbean. I was, of course, really hoping for a different result. But when Caroline finally let me have the mirror, I realized I’d been hoping for too much. I didn’t look better. Just different, and not a little slutty, I must say. My complexion didn’t look right. And my eyes looked even smaller.
    “Well, what do you think?” She chewed on her lip waiting for my answer.
    “It’s great. I…love it. Thanks.”
    “Do you really? I wasn’t sure.”
    Okay, even Caroline knew I didn’t look good.
    “I’ve got to go, but we can do it again anytime. I’ll show you how to get the eye shadow to do right, too.”
    “Thanks, Caroline,” I said, trying to hide my depression over the sad state of my ugliness. I’d been really hoping she could make me look prettier. This wasn’t prettier.
    When I got to Madison’s house, she said, “What the hell? Did somebody’s makeup kit explode on your face?”
    “Sort of,” I said, wondering why I didn’t have friends with more sensitivity.
    “Hi, Ally,” her mother called from the kitchen. “Oh.” She stopped and studied me. “New look?”
    “I know it’s terrible. My stepsister was trying to help. I guess I’m just hopeless.”
    Madison’s mom was freaking me out the way she was staring. Finally she said, “Not hopeless. Those are just all the wrong tones for you. You don’t need to be wearing browns. And the foundation is too light. Your stepsister must have used her own makeup.”
    I nodded.
    “Tell you what girls.” Madison’s mother must have felt sorry for me what with my mom abandoning me and all. “I’ll call in an expert. My Mary Kay consultant works wonders. Let me see if she can get here this afternoon.”
    “Oh, you don’t have to— ” I didn’t mean to ruin the whole day.
    “No. Let her,” Madison said.