think of that. I will stay home if you think it best.”
“I do.”
She forced a smile. “Then I will see you sometime next week?”
“Jah, Lord willing. Good night.” He turned his back on her and sauntered down her sidewalk as if he were going to a picnic.
Miriam sighed and wiped away a lone tear. Seeing Ephraim usually sent her soaring to the sky with elation, but his visit had only succeeded in making her feel worse than ever. She felt selfish, wishing for Ephraim’s comfort at a time when the whole community reeled from the arrest, but loneliness still encompassed her as she watched him disappear into the darkness.
Chapter 10
“Anything I should know about before I look in these drawers?”
Yost stood in the doorway with his hands balled into fists, his eyes on the floor. He shook his head. Miriam waited beside him, fixing her eyes on the caseworker or parole officer or whoever he was as he opened one drawer after another and stirred Yost’s few clothes around, looking for drugs or something else illegal.
Mamm, Susie, and the three little boys had shut themselves in Mamm’s room while this Englischer invaded their privacy. One of the conditions of Yost’s release was that an officer of the court could appear at the home any time of the day to check on Yost and search his things for drugs. Only a week and a half after Yost’s release, the Englischer had already made three visits.
There wasn’t much to search. Yost and Raymond’s room consisted of two beds, a small chest of drawers, and a rag rug on the floor. The Englischer still managed to make a mess of the room as he checked under the mattresses and pulled clothes out of the drawers.
Leaving both mattresses askew, the chubby, balding man picked up his clipboard and jotted down a few notes.
He spoke to Yost, but Yost wouldn’t look at him. “Be at the justice center on Wednesday at three to meet with your parole officer. You’re doing good, but don’t forget that one of your parents must be with you at all times. If they both have to go out, you gotta go with them.”
Yost nodded, his eyes still glued to the floor. He had already experienced the humiliating consequences of that rule. Last Thursday, Miriam and Mamm had dragged Yost to a quilting bee. He sat in the corner of the kitchen at Mary Hoover’s house enduring the pitiful looks of the women and the curious eyes of the little girls. He had come home and barricaded himself in his room. From below, Miriam heard him pacing the floor and pounding on walls.
Now, she followed the Englischer to the front door. He didn’t smile, and she didn’t smile. They simply nodded to each other before she closed the door and shut him out. Yost endured the humiliation because he had no other choice, but Miriam found it nearly unbearable.
Upstairs, Yost stood in the spot where she had left him, carved from stone and sand.
“Cum,” Miriam said. “I will help you tidy the room.”
“I can’t stand this,” Yost muttered. “I can’t stand this.”
Miriam didn’t know how to respond except with anger, so she chose to ignore his turmoil. “Tuck the sheet on that side.”
Yost didn’t move. “I felt like I was on fire, like the flames would jump out of my hands and burn me up. I hate him for coming.”
Miriam’s pulse raced with the urge to lash out at her brother. You brought this on yourself, you know. Mamm hides in her room in shame because you let greed overtake your virtue. My Ephraim hasn’t set foot on our property for ten days because your behavior has spread a stain of sin over our entire family. Our perfect, exemplary family.
Get out! she wanted to scream. Go away and never come home again!
Instead, she turned her back on him, adjusted the mattress on Raymond’s bed, and tucked the sheet into place. She smoothed the quilts on each bed—red, white, and blue pinwheel patterns. She had made them last year right before her baptism.
Yost slumped his shoulders and leaned against the
“I do.”
She forced a smile. “Then I will see you sometime next week?”
“Jah, Lord willing. Good night.” He turned his back on her and sauntered down her sidewalk as if he were going to a picnic.
Miriam sighed and wiped away a lone tear. Seeing Ephraim usually sent her soaring to the sky with elation, but his visit had only succeeded in making her feel worse than ever. She felt selfish, wishing for Ephraim’s comfort at a time when the whole community reeled from the arrest, but loneliness still encompassed her as she watched him disappear into the darkness.
Chapter 10
“Anything I should know about before I look in these drawers?”
Yost stood in the doorway with his hands balled into fists, his eyes on the floor. He shook his head. Miriam waited beside him, fixing her eyes on the caseworker or parole officer or whoever he was as he opened one drawer after another and stirred Yost’s few clothes around, looking for drugs or something else illegal.
Mamm, Susie, and the three little boys had shut themselves in Mamm’s room while this Englischer invaded their privacy. One of the conditions of Yost’s release was that an officer of the court could appear at the home any time of the day to check on Yost and search his things for drugs. Only a week and a half after Yost’s release, the Englischer had already made three visits.
There wasn’t much to search. Yost and Raymond’s room consisted of two beds, a small chest of drawers, and a rag rug on the floor. The Englischer still managed to make a mess of the room as he checked under the mattresses and pulled clothes out of the drawers.
Leaving both mattresses askew, the chubby, balding man picked up his clipboard and jotted down a few notes.
He spoke to Yost, but Yost wouldn’t look at him. “Be at the justice center on Wednesday at three to meet with your parole officer. You’re doing good, but don’t forget that one of your parents must be with you at all times. If they both have to go out, you gotta go with them.”
Yost nodded, his eyes still glued to the floor. He had already experienced the humiliating consequences of that rule. Last Thursday, Miriam and Mamm had dragged Yost to a quilting bee. He sat in the corner of the kitchen at Mary Hoover’s house enduring the pitiful looks of the women and the curious eyes of the little girls. He had come home and barricaded himself in his room. From below, Miriam heard him pacing the floor and pounding on walls.
Now, she followed the Englischer to the front door. He didn’t smile, and she didn’t smile. They simply nodded to each other before she closed the door and shut him out. Yost endured the humiliation because he had no other choice, but Miriam found it nearly unbearable.
Upstairs, Yost stood in the spot where she had left him, carved from stone and sand.
“Cum,” Miriam said. “I will help you tidy the room.”
“I can’t stand this,” Yost muttered. “I can’t stand this.”
Miriam didn’t know how to respond except with anger, so she chose to ignore his turmoil. “Tuck the sheet on that side.”
Yost didn’t move. “I felt like I was on fire, like the flames would jump out of my hands and burn me up. I hate him for coming.”
Miriam’s pulse raced with the urge to lash out at her brother. You brought this on yourself, you know. Mamm hides in her room in shame because you let greed overtake your virtue. My Ephraim hasn’t set foot on our property for ten days because your behavior has spread a stain of sin over our entire family. Our perfect, exemplary family.
Get out! she wanted to scream. Go away and never come home again!
Instead, she turned her back on him, adjusted the mattress on Raymond’s bed, and tucked the sheet into place. She smoothed the quilts on each bed—red, white, and blue pinwheel patterns. She had made them last year right before her baptism.
Yost slumped his shoulders and leaned against the
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