due date.” She motions for me to lie back on the examination table. As I lay staring at the ceiling, I can’t help but remember my last OB/GYN visit. A sad feeling washes over me. Was I really considering giving my baby up? I shake my head to get rid of the thought, not wanting to put a damper on this moment.
As Dr. Bussey is waving the gooey ultrasound wand over my exposed belly, I can’t help but stare at the screen. The picture is black and grey and very fuzzy, but suddenly my eye catches a small flashing and I hear a thump, thump, thump.
“That’s the heartbeat you hear and that little flashing orb right there . . . that’s your baby’s heart,” she says, pointing to the screen. I blink my eyes as I focus on the screen and I can’t pull my eyes away. I’m so glued to that small flash as my eyes widen and my heart races. That’s my baby, that’s mine and Sam’s baby. Look what you are missing, Sam.
“Okay, let’s see if we can get an idea of whether this is a boy or a girl.” Dr. Bussey presses and moves my stomach around.
“And it looks like it’s a girl,” she says.
“A girl. I’m gonna have a girl?” I ask softly.
“Yes, a girl, and by the measurements, I would say you are eighteen weeks,” she smiles.
“Eighteen weeks, so that would be four months and two weeks,” I say, doing the math in my head.
“That’s right, you are about halfway through your second trimester,” she adds.
I take a deep breath as she takes my hand and helps me to sit up. “Here is a prescription for prenatal vitamins; take one each morning starting tomorrow.” She hands me the paper. “You can get dressed and I’ll see you next month.” I make my next appointment and walk out of her office. I sit in my car and stare at the ultrasound picture. It’s hard to make out exactly what I’m looking at, but I love her regardless. I continue to look at all the pamphlets and booklets that are in the bag the nurse gave me: Natural Childbirth: Is it for you?, What if I have to have a Cesarean Section?, Breastfeeding or Bottle feeding: What are the Benefits? This is so overwhelming and surreal. I try to catch my breath.
My aunt is just getting home from her lunch with her book club as I’m getting out of my car. “Maggie, what did the doctor say?” She meets me on the front steps.
“Aunt Virginia, I’m going to have a girl!” I squeal, showing her the ultrasound pictures.
“Oh my. A girl. That’s wonderful, sweetie!” she exclaims, looking at the grey and black fuzzy picture while I attempt to point out her head, legs, and arms.
“I’m gonna be a mommy,” I say. We both walk into the house.
After I fill her in on all the details of my appointment, I sit on my bed and text pictures of my ultrasound to Nadia and Sydney.
Me: Here SHE is!
Sydney: OMG! It’s a girl!!
Nadia: Oh how sweet!
Me: I think she’s beautiful, even if it is hard to see her face.
Sydney: Of course she’s beautiful!
Nadia: What are you going to name her?
Me: I haven’t decided. I’ll have to think about it and I’ll let you know.
I go downstairs to help with dinner. Aunt Virginia hums as she cooks and I sigh as I sit at the table, feeling scared but content.
“You’re very quiet tonight, Maggie. Is everything okay?” she asks during dinner.
“I’m okay, I’m just so overwhelmed by all of this. I have so much to do to get ready for her.” I shake my head at the thought.
“How about we go shopping this weekend?” she asks.
“That’s a great idea,” I reply.
“I’ve been thinking about names and I think I want to name her after Mom,” I announce.
Aunt Virginia smiles and pats my hand. “I think that’s perfect. Your mother would have loved that.” Tears form in her eyes.
My mother’s name was Eleanor and it suited her well. She was a beautiful woman; tall and thin with long red hair that had just enough curl. We shared the same light green eyes.
“I could call her Ellie.
As Dr. Bussey is waving the gooey ultrasound wand over my exposed belly, I can’t help but stare at the screen. The picture is black and grey and very fuzzy, but suddenly my eye catches a small flashing and I hear a thump, thump, thump.
“That’s the heartbeat you hear and that little flashing orb right there . . . that’s your baby’s heart,” she says, pointing to the screen. I blink my eyes as I focus on the screen and I can’t pull my eyes away. I’m so glued to that small flash as my eyes widen and my heart races. That’s my baby, that’s mine and Sam’s baby. Look what you are missing, Sam.
“Okay, let’s see if we can get an idea of whether this is a boy or a girl.” Dr. Bussey presses and moves my stomach around.
“And it looks like it’s a girl,” she says.
“A girl. I’m gonna have a girl?” I ask softly.
“Yes, a girl, and by the measurements, I would say you are eighteen weeks,” she smiles.
“Eighteen weeks, so that would be four months and two weeks,” I say, doing the math in my head.
“That’s right, you are about halfway through your second trimester,” she adds.
I take a deep breath as she takes my hand and helps me to sit up. “Here is a prescription for prenatal vitamins; take one each morning starting tomorrow.” She hands me the paper. “You can get dressed and I’ll see you next month.” I make my next appointment and walk out of her office. I sit in my car and stare at the ultrasound picture. It’s hard to make out exactly what I’m looking at, but I love her regardless. I continue to look at all the pamphlets and booklets that are in the bag the nurse gave me: Natural Childbirth: Is it for you?, What if I have to have a Cesarean Section?, Breastfeeding or Bottle feeding: What are the Benefits? This is so overwhelming and surreal. I try to catch my breath.
My aunt is just getting home from her lunch with her book club as I’m getting out of my car. “Maggie, what did the doctor say?” She meets me on the front steps.
“Aunt Virginia, I’m going to have a girl!” I squeal, showing her the ultrasound pictures.
“Oh my. A girl. That’s wonderful, sweetie!” she exclaims, looking at the grey and black fuzzy picture while I attempt to point out her head, legs, and arms.
“I’m gonna be a mommy,” I say. We both walk into the house.
After I fill her in on all the details of my appointment, I sit on my bed and text pictures of my ultrasound to Nadia and Sydney.
Me: Here SHE is!
Sydney: OMG! It’s a girl!!
Nadia: Oh how sweet!
Me: I think she’s beautiful, even if it is hard to see her face.
Sydney: Of course she’s beautiful!
Nadia: What are you going to name her?
Me: I haven’t decided. I’ll have to think about it and I’ll let you know.
I go downstairs to help with dinner. Aunt Virginia hums as she cooks and I sigh as I sit at the table, feeling scared but content.
“You’re very quiet tonight, Maggie. Is everything okay?” she asks during dinner.
“I’m okay, I’m just so overwhelmed by all of this. I have so much to do to get ready for her.” I shake my head at the thought.
“How about we go shopping this weekend?” she asks.
“That’s a great idea,” I reply.
“I’ve been thinking about names and I think I want to name her after Mom,” I announce.
Aunt Virginia smiles and pats my hand. “I think that’s perfect. Your mother would have loved that.” Tears form in her eyes.
My mother’s name was Eleanor and it suited her well. She was a beautiful woman; tall and thin with long red hair that had just enough curl. We shared the same light green eyes.
“I could call her Ellie.
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