got Mom to sit with me while I watched TV, until she conked out sometime around midnight.
The next morning I left a message for Betty Lou telling her we needed a family conference and asking if she could stop by right away. I knew she had fifty or a hundred other clients, or more. I hoped she could make it soon, but no matter, I was going to stay home as long as it took to make a workable plan.
Betty Lou called back and said sheâd be by in the late afternoon and for me to phone every relative I knew about and see whether any would be willing to take care of Mom for a few months, like you would do for an ailing father or mother.
I started with Momâs two sisters in Utah. They each said no right off.
I remember Mom saying her half brother and his wife in Manteca were âdo-gooders.â I should have started with them. He, Arvin, said yes after a fairly bad argument with his wife, most of which I caught over the phone. If I heard right, the promise of a new car and some remodeling swung the deal. I had never met him or his wife, and I did my best to prepare them for how Mom was. He said he didnât think it would be an impossible problem because his wife was very involved in the temple, and she and her friends were always looking for a project that would help someone.
By noon Mom was up and in the kitchen, eating some toast and drinking fruit juice. I told her we were going to have a family meeting later today, and that Iâd wake her if she was asleep. She avoided my eyes. I thought I heard her say, âIâm sorry,â as she shuffled back to her bedroom.
When Betty Lou came, I gave her the half brotherâs name, address, and phone number.
âIsnât your mother still married?â she asked.
âYeah, to Dad, but I donât think heâll mind.â
âHe wonât interfere with this plan?â she asked, watching me closely to see if I was pulling a fast one.
âDad?â I may have snorted. âHe took himself out of the equation a few months ago. He gives me money, but he said heâs never coming home again. He kind of washed his hands of the whole problem.â
âWell, he didnât get them very clean, did he?â Betty Lou said, frowning.
I hated to think it, but I was ashamed of my dad. Ashamed that Betty Lou knew what a loser he was. And I wondered if I would ever forgive him. But I didnât say that.
âWell, I think heâs maybe got his own problems,â I said, instead. âHeâs done a disappearing act, but heâs not really nasty. Heâs just ⦠he just wonât be involved.â
âHe has to be involved enough to write you a note to school explaining your absences,â Betty Lou said, covering the bases. âGot to get the school thing square or the whole plan could cave in.â
âRight. Iâll get Dad to write a note.â Screw him, Z will do it.
I brought Mom to join Betty Lou and me in the living room. They sat. I stood.
âI called this,â I said, holding Momâs attention with my look, âbecause I canât do this family thing anymore. I have to go to school and have a life of my own. I canât stay home and take care of you, and right now, you canât take care of yourself. Betty Lou is going to help you get settled with Arvin in Manteca.â
Mom groaned and rolled her eyes. âOhhhhh,â she said, like a wail. âBen ⦠I canât go there. What will they think of me?â She started crying.
Betty Lou said, âMrs. Mander,â but I interrupted her.
âMom, youâve got to think about whatâs best for me, too. I canât take care of you here, and you wonât take care of yourself. And you need people your own age who can make sure you take your medication like youâre supposed to. I canât help you, but Arvin and his wife can, and thatâs the way itâs going to be.â
Mom whimpered but
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