dunno. It’s bigger than I thought. I don’t wanna get in trouble.”
I wait for Kat to snap, to hiss at her like she usually does, but instead she wraps an arm around Baby’s thick shoulder. “It’s okay. Nothing’s gonna happen. Just have fun, that’s all. Like the rest of these people. Just act normal.”
There are lots of rides. Small ones for little kids. Teacups that spin, a small red train, a miniature roller coaster. Kat pulls out a wad of wrinkled cash. “Which one you wanna go on first?”
Baby grins. “The teacups!”
We get in line, wait our turn, but the man looks at Baby and frowns.
“This ride’s for children. How old are you?”
“None of your business,” Kat answers. “We got money. Just let her on.”
“Sorry. She’s too big. She won’t fit.”
Kat shoots him a glare like a punch. “We got money.”
“She’s too big. Sorry.”
Baby’s face falls a little.
“You’re an asshole,” Kat snaps. “C’mon, Baby. We’ll find a different ride. This one’s stupid anyway.”
And so, we wander. There are games to play. Kat gives Baby a dollar. She steps up to a counter, throws a ball at a target, and misses. “Keep tryin’,” Kat insists with her new voice. Baby tries again, but the ball plops to the ground.
“This is stupid,” she grumbles. Then Kat grabs a ball, scrunches her forehead, and whales it hard at thetarget. A bell squeals and the whole thing lights up.
“We have a winner!” the man announces. Someone behind us cheers. Baby jumps and claps. “You did it!” she shouts. “You did it, Kat!”
“Choose your prize, young lady,” says the man. Baby picks a stuffed giraffe and hugs it tight, her big saucer eyes shining and full as she runs to the next game. “I wanna try this one!”
“You better win me something, girl,” Kat says with a laugh, rubbing Baby’s head, and my heart lifts up, fills me up till I think I might explode. Baby, in her striped pink pajamas. Kat, with her unpainted face. And me.
All together. Like a family.
You see me, Mama?
“Can I get some cotton candy?” I whisper.
“Hell yeah,” says Kat, holding out a ten. “Get two.”
And I do. I get two, and I don’t wipe the sugar off my face.
For the next hour, we dash from one game to the next. Kat can throw a ball at anything. She hardly ever misses. We win another animal—a huge panda bear. Then we race, all of us holding guns, squirting water at metal frogs that swim across a fake ocean. Kat winsagain and the man hands us a goldfish in a plastic bag.
“Like Nemo!” Baby shrieks. “Kat! Can we keep him?!”
“We’ll see,” Kat says. But I know we can’t. We can’t keep anything, or Daddy will know we were here.
Then we approach it. The Ferris wheel. The fake moon I see at night.
WONDER WHEEL, it says, in giant red letters. Baby stares up at it.
“Wanna go on?” Kat asks.
And Baby can only nod, her mouth hanging open. “I bet you can see the whole world from up there.”
“Go ’head. I’ll wait here.”
“Come with me,” Baby whines.
“Nah. I can’t. The baby and all. Queen Bee says I gotta be careful.”
“I’ll stay with you,” I say.
“I don’t wanna go on by myself,” Baby complains.
A woman standing ahead of us in line smiles with her face freckled and brown hair with streaks of blond. “She can come on with us if she’d like to.” Her little boy grins with ice-cream-covered teeth.
“Okay,” Baby says, and we watch as she climbs intoa blue swinging cage. The door shuts noisily, and then she’s in the air.
Kat and I sit on a bench, the ocean right there next to us. I breathe in the air, the sun that keeps rising, the water that licks at the shore. I wonder where my mother is. I wish that she knew that I’ve made it to New York, that I have a family. A real family. And that soon we’ll move away, to someplace beautiful and quiet.
Maybe I’ll go back to school.
I’ll teach Kat how to cook all sorts of good things. Just like
I wait for Kat to snap, to hiss at her like she usually does, but instead she wraps an arm around Baby’s thick shoulder. “It’s okay. Nothing’s gonna happen. Just have fun, that’s all. Like the rest of these people. Just act normal.”
There are lots of rides. Small ones for little kids. Teacups that spin, a small red train, a miniature roller coaster. Kat pulls out a wad of wrinkled cash. “Which one you wanna go on first?”
Baby grins. “The teacups!”
We get in line, wait our turn, but the man looks at Baby and frowns.
“This ride’s for children. How old are you?”
“None of your business,” Kat answers. “We got money. Just let her on.”
“Sorry. She’s too big. She won’t fit.”
Kat shoots him a glare like a punch. “We got money.”
“She’s too big. Sorry.”
Baby’s face falls a little.
“You’re an asshole,” Kat snaps. “C’mon, Baby. We’ll find a different ride. This one’s stupid anyway.”
And so, we wander. There are games to play. Kat gives Baby a dollar. She steps up to a counter, throws a ball at a target, and misses. “Keep tryin’,” Kat insists with her new voice. Baby tries again, but the ball plops to the ground.
“This is stupid,” she grumbles. Then Kat grabs a ball, scrunches her forehead, and whales it hard at thetarget. A bell squeals and the whole thing lights up.
“We have a winner!” the man announces. Someone behind us cheers. Baby jumps and claps. “You did it!” she shouts. “You did it, Kat!”
“Choose your prize, young lady,” says the man. Baby picks a stuffed giraffe and hugs it tight, her big saucer eyes shining and full as she runs to the next game. “I wanna try this one!”
“You better win me something, girl,” Kat says with a laugh, rubbing Baby’s head, and my heart lifts up, fills me up till I think I might explode. Baby, in her striped pink pajamas. Kat, with her unpainted face. And me.
All together. Like a family.
You see me, Mama?
“Can I get some cotton candy?” I whisper.
“Hell yeah,” says Kat, holding out a ten. “Get two.”
And I do. I get two, and I don’t wipe the sugar off my face.
For the next hour, we dash from one game to the next. Kat can throw a ball at anything. She hardly ever misses. We win another animal—a huge panda bear. Then we race, all of us holding guns, squirting water at metal frogs that swim across a fake ocean. Kat winsagain and the man hands us a goldfish in a plastic bag.
“Like Nemo!” Baby shrieks. “Kat! Can we keep him?!”
“We’ll see,” Kat says. But I know we can’t. We can’t keep anything, or Daddy will know we were here.
Then we approach it. The Ferris wheel. The fake moon I see at night.
WONDER WHEEL, it says, in giant red letters. Baby stares up at it.
“Wanna go on?” Kat asks.
And Baby can only nod, her mouth hanging open. “I bet you can see the whole world from up there.”
“Go ’head. I’ll wait here.”
“Come with me,” Baby whines.
“Nah. I can’t. The baby and all. Queen Bee says I gotta be careful.”
“I’ll stay with you,” I say.
“I don’t wanna go on by myself,” Baby complains.
A woman standing ahead of us in line smiles with her face freckled and brown hair with streaks of blond. “She can come on with us if she’d like to.” Her little boy grins with ice-cream-covered teeth.
“Okay,” Baby says, and we watch as she climbs intoa blue swinging cage. The door shuts noisily, and then she’s in the air.
Kat and I sit on a bench, the ocean right there next to us. I breathe in the air, the sun that keeps rising, the water that licks at the shore. I wonder where my mother is. I wish that she knew that I’ve made it to New York, that I have a family. A real family. And that soon we’ll move away, to someplace beautiful and quiet.
Maybe I’ll go back to school.
I’ll teach Kat how to cook all sorts of good things. Just like
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