Little Battles by N.K. Smith Page A

greenhouse.”
    Again, I wanted to say something to stop her, but my mouth wouldn’t cooperate and she was already out of the car. This was not how I’d wanted this morning to go.
    After a few more minutes, I got out. Glancing over, I saw that David’s Scout, his prized SUV, was already parked in its usual spot, but no one was around it. I would have liked to have walked in with them like I usually did so I could remove the terror that hummed in my head and caused my heart to race just a little faster.
    It was completely illogical to be frightened of walking into a building that I’d walked into hundreds of times before.
    I felt stupid.
    “D-D-Dalton!”
    My stomach knotted as I saw Chris run up to me, a smile on his face. If I hadn’t known better, he would have looked like a friend coming to greet me. “She looks fantastic today. Her ass makes my dick ache.”
    I hoisted my bag up higher on my shoulder.
    “Did you at least feel her up on the way to school? Maybe get a hand down her pants?”
    If I hadn’t stuttered so badly, I would have told him to shut up, but the only recognizable sounds I could make were “sh” and “ta, ta, ta”.
    I winced as his fist connected with my already-bruised side again.
    “You’re a fucking retard, D-D-Dalton. Even if you did manage to get her to spread her legs, she couldn’t have been that satisfied.” He chucked his thumb behind him. “She’s already in the woods with Fox. I guarantee you they’re not just getting high.”
    I was already doubled over, so the elbow he shot into my side did nothing to help me breathe.
    “What do you think he’s doing to her right now? I’ll bet he’s got her on her knees. I bet she likes that shit.”
    I tried not to listen and when I failed, I tried to remind myself that he was a moron who was only saying this stuff because he wanted me to hurt for some reason. I wished he would just stop talking and hit me again. That would have been easier to take.
    I stood up, waiting on Chris.
    “Come on, D-D-Dalton. I know you’ve thought about it. She’s so small, right? I’m going to pick her right up and fuck her against a wall and when I’m ready to shoot my load, I’m going to drop her and come all over her face, just like Jason’s doing right now.”
    Chris put the palm of his hand against my face and pushed. “Aw, don’t fucking cry, D-D-Dalton. You don’t honestly believe that you have a shot at her, do you?”
    He laughed his wicked laugh and again I wondered what was so deficient in his life that he had to be so cruel.
    I just looked at the ground, trying not to let what he was saying take purchase in my head. When Chris finally walked away, I felt my body relax just a little.
    I swallowed hard, wondering if the whole week was going to go like this.
    I passed Sophie in the hall just before the first period bell rang. Although she smiled at me, I wondered if she actually saw me at all. I wondered why no one else could see how high she was. Didn’t the teachers care?
    My feet automatically carried me through the day as I felt like my mind had taken a vacation. During Study Hall, I watched as Sophie talked to Aiden, the look in her eyes resembling something I’d seen before. Then she left early like always, following Jason Fox.
    Chris’s words echoed in my mind and I wondered if they were just getting high. No matter how much I tried to remind myself that she wasn’t mine, it still hurt to think about her like everyone else did.
    I didn’t want to picture that in my head. I didn’t want her doing those things.
    But she wasn’t mine, and according to her, I shouldn’t want what I couldn’t have.
    Still, I knew that even though she thought she wasn’t emotionally available to me, somewhere deep within her, she wanted to be. Otherwise the back and forth nature of our relationship wouldn’t be there. She wouldn’t run away from me only to come back, ready to expose herself and her deep riverbed of secrets just a little