Keeping You a Secret by Julie Anne Peters Page B

we’ve been going together for a long time. A year.”
    “That’s not what I asked.”
    I couldn’t look at her. Couldn’t risk her seeing through me, reading me.
    “Do you hear bells?” she asked.
    I had to smile at that. “Bells?”
    “You know, bells. Music, fireworks.” She wiggled her eyebrows.
    I let out a short laugh. It sounded strangled, same way I felt. “Only in my dreams.”
    “Oh, yeah?” She arched an eyebrow.
    Why did I say that? God.
    Cece said softly, “Maybe you should listen to your dreams.”
    My stomach suffered a major eruption.
    She pushed off the locker she’d been balancing against with the sole of her shoe and said, “Think about it.”
    Like I haven’t been. “Do you think about it?” I asked at her back.
    She stopped and turned around. “I don’t have to. I know.”
    Stampeding hooves interrupted our conversation as the entire track team thundered down the hall between us. By the time I elbowed through the bodies, she was gone.

    ***

    I agreed with everything Seth suggested for the leadership conference. Whether we set up the tables in a U or an open square made no difference to me. It was trivial. I wanted it gone. Wanted him gone.
    “We didn’t talk about how to split the participants up into corporations.” Seth trailed me out the door of the media center. “Or who we want to invite as speakers for the panel.”
    “Whatever. You decide.” Just go, I screamed silently. Let me go.
    “How about after school? We could meet –”
    “I have to work.”
    “Then tonight.”
    “Leah and Kirsten are coming over. They’re both going through these major traumas, you know. I promised we’d get together.” I was such a liar. Thank God he couldn’t read me like Cece.
    The late bell rang. “There’s a teacher in-service on Wednesday,” Seth called at my back. “We have the day off. Want to get together then?”
    “Sure,” I tossed over my shoulder.
    “Ten o’clock. Come over to my house.”
    It barely registered. I sprinted down the arts wing. She was there, in class, talking and laughing with Brandi.
    Brandi. I wished her gone, too. Cece and I made the briefest eye contact before I stumbled to my seat. Dazed, unsteady. My heart carved a caved a cavern in my chest. All period long I tried to send Cece mental messages: Look at me, smile at me, be with me. Mackel gave us an assignment to draw the other half of a face. A child’s face, from a picture he’d blown up. It forced me to focus my energy. Good. Concentrate on the face. The child. The task at hand.
    I got so absorbed in the project, the period ended and chairs scraped back. Cece stood with Brandi. I ripped the page out of my tablet and rushed to the front of the room to hand in my assignment, to catch her, talk to her.
    Mackel snagged my drawing off the top of the stack. “Whoa, whoa. Come back her, lady.” He flagged me down. “Let’s have a look at this.”
    Damn. Cece exited with Brandi. She glanced over her shoulder at me and held my eyes.
    “Ooh, ooh,” Mackel cooed over my drawing. “Tell me how you approached this.”
    “Um,” I twisted back, “Head on. I really have to go.” I shuffled backward toward the door.
    “In. Credible.” Mackel shook his head. “I can’t even tell which of the halves you drew.”
    I raced out the door, sprinted to the stairwell, and skidded to a stop. No sign of her. Not in the halls, not on the stairs. Where could she be?
    I thought I spotted her on my way to econ, then after class at the drinking fountain, then lurking outside the door to the gym, but each time I backtracked, she’d vanished. As if she was a mirage. Or an illusion. That was it, an illusion. Like my life – a reality just out of reach.

    ***

    My phone rang on the way to work. I dug through my bag on the seat beside me, cursing. I was already late, having stalled around to catch Cece at her lockerr and missing her again. Where was she? “Yeah, hello?” I snarled.
    “Hi. Know who this