wasn’t ready to hear that just yet.
But perhaps his tone had been sufficiently forbidding, because Lewis didn’t ask anything else, other than a brief enquiry about the books. “Shall I carry them, as you’ve already got your bag?”
Jasper hefted his overstuffed bag over his shoulder, almost knocking over a pile in the process. “Erm, are you sure? You shouldn’t have to.”
“It’s fine. I’m stronger than I look, honest.”
“You look pretty strong to me.”
“Thanks.” Lewis beamed. “I never seem to bulk up however much I work out, but I like to think I’m not a total wimp.”
“Not at all.” Jasper admired the breadth of Lewis’s shoulders and the wiry musculature visible in his forearms as he lifted the pile of bulky textbooks. “After you.”
Jasper had to squint when they got outside as the sun was now reflecting off the wet pavements, dazzling them both.
“Blimey, that’s bright.” Lewis shifted the books into a one-armed grip against his side and shaded his eyes with his free hand. “Wish I’d remembered to bring my shades with me.”
“Wish I knew where mine were. I think I might have some kind of goblin infestation.”
“Goblins?”
“Something keeps stealing my stuff, and I can’t see mice having any use for a pair of prescription sunglasses.”
Lewis chuckled, and as they fell into an easy conversation on the various bad habits of goblins, Jasper kept on sneaking glances at Lewis’s arms. His muscles bulged enticingly, just begging to be touched. Shame Jasper would never have the nerve to reach out and do it.
When they got to the café, Yusef was clearly having one of his grumpy days, but his face softened as he saw them both. “Jasper! You’ve come to eat some baklava, I hope. I hate having to throw it away at the end of the day. And you,” he said, turning to Lewis. “You need something to put some meat on your bones. None of this black coffee nonsense today, you hear me?”
“But I like it black.”
“You’ll like it more with milk. Trust me. I do it properly. None of this overcooked rubbish you get in your Starbucks or your Costas, where the milk gets scalded and they have to cover up the taste with all those nasty syrups. No, with Yusef you will get a velvety-rich milk, naturally sweet. I’ll do you a latté.”
Lewis shook his head a little but smiled sweetly and agreed.
Compliant . That was kind of endearing, but worrying. The idea that someone might take advantage of Lewis’s urge to please. Yes, that was worrying. Jasper scowled as he ordered his usual.
“Yes,” Yusef continued, pointing at Jasper. “Here is a man who likes everything loaded with sugar. Perhaps you can work on that too with him. I hate to think of him getting diabetes because of my cooking.”
“I’m not a project,” Jasper said, annoyed. “I’ll look after my health myself, thanks.”
“You make sure you do, young man. I don’t want to lose another of my old friends.”
“Another?” Lewis asked.
“I had a letter this morning. My oldest friend, Murat. We were like brothers growing up. Closer than brothers as teenagers. He held a piece of my heart all these years.”
Oh God, Yusef was about to cry. Tears had begun welling up as he thumped his fist against his chest. “I’m so sorry,” Jasper began, but already Lewis was heading around to the other side of the counter and hugging Yusef. To Jasper’s amazement, Yusef hugged him back and sobbed into his neck.
“We weren’t brave enough to be together. And I loved my wife so much. But sometimes when I think of what could have been—” Yusef broke down again, his words incoherent.
So Yusef had loved another man too? That explained a lot. His easy acceptance of Jasper’s sexuality, for one thing. Jasper wished he could just walk around there and join in the hug, but he wasn’t like Lewis. He couldn’t just put himself forward like that. Best to stick to words, but it was so difficult to find comforting ones
But perhaps his tone had been sufficiently forbidding, because Lewis didn’t ask anything else, other than a brief enquiry about the books. “Shall I carry them, as you’ve already got your bag?”
Jasper hefted his overstuffed bag over his shoulder, almost knocking over a pile in the process. “Erm, are you sure? You shouldn’t have to.”
“It’s fine. I’m stronger than I look, honest.”
“You look pretty strong to me.”
“Thanks.” Lewis beamed. “I never seem to bulk up however much I work out, but I like to think I’m not a total wimp.”
“Not at all.” Jasper admired the breadth of Lewis’s shoulders and the wiry musculature visible in his forearms as he lifted the pile of bulky textbooks. “After you.”
Jasper had to squint when they got outside as the sun was now reflecting off the wet pavements, dazzling them both.
“Blimey, that’s bright.” Lewis shifted the books into a one-armed grip against his side and shaded his eyes with his free hand. “Wish I’d remembered to bring my shades with me.”
“Wish I knew where mine were. I think I might have some kind of goblin infestation.”
“Goblins?”
“Something keeps stealing my stuff, and I can’t see mice having any use for a pair of prescription sunglasses.”
Lewis chuckled, and as they fell into an easy conversation on the various bad habits of goblins, Jasper kept on sneaking glances at Lewis’s arms. His muscles bulged enticingly, just begging to be touched. Shame Jasper would never have the nerve to reach out and do it.
When they got to the café, Yusef was clearly having one of his grumpy days, but his face softened as he saw them both. “Jasper! You’ve come to eat some baklava, I hope. I hate having to throw it away at the end of the day. And you,” he said, turning to Lewis. “You need something to put some meat on your bones. None of this black coffee nonsense today, you hear me?”
“But I like it black.”
“You’ll like it more with milk. Trust me. I do it properly. None of this overcooked rubbish you get in your Starbucks or your Costas, where the milk gets scalded and they have to cover up the taste with all those nasty syrups. No, with Yusef you will get a velvety-rich milk, naturally sweet. I’ll do you a latté.”
Lewis shook his head a little but smiled sweetly and agreed.
Compliant . That was kind of endearing, but worrying. The idea that someone might take advantage of Lewis’s urge to please. Yes, that was worrying. Jasper scowled as he ordered his usual.
“Yes,” Yusef continued, pointing at Jasper. “Here is a man who likes everything loaded with sugar. Perhaps you can work on that too with him. I hate to think of him getting diabetes because of my cooking.”
“I’m not a project,” Jasper said, annoyed. “I’ll look after my health myself, thanks.”
“You make sure you do, young man. I don’t want to lose another of my old friends.”
“Another?” Lewis asked.
“I had a letter this morning. My oldest friend, Murat. We were like brothers growing up. Closer than brothers as teenagers. He held a piece of my heart all these years.”
Oh God, Yusef was about to cry. Tears had begun welling up as he thumped his fist against his chest. “I’m so sorry,” Jasper began, but already Lewis was heading around to the other side of the counter and hugging Yusef. To Jasper’s amazement, Yusef hugged him back and sobbed into his neck.
“We weren’t brave enough to be together. And I loved my wife so much. But sometimes when I think of what could have been—” Yusef broke down again, his words incoherent.
So Yusef had loved another man too? That explained a lot. His easy acceptance of Jasper’s sexuality, for one thing. Jasper wished he could just walk around there and join in the hug, but he wasn’t like Lewis. He couldn’t just put himself forward like that. Best to stick to words, but it was so difficult to find comforting ones
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