Ivy Secrets by Jean Stone Page A

free to say things like, “God, I hate having my period,” or “That bitch of a professor dumps too much work on us,” or even a playful “fuck you” to her friends. But Viktor wasn’t going away, so Tess got used to saving herintimate discussions for their rooms. And for pizza on Saturday nights.
    Though she talked to her mother every week, Tess did not mention her new royal friend. Her mother’s delight would be too annoying, and she’d ask too many questions, tell too many people. Having Marina as a friend was more important than showing her off, but Tess knew her mother wouldn’t understand that. Besides, it wasn’t as if Marina talked very much about herself—or talked very much at all. It was Charlie and Tess who did most of the talking, and Marina who did most of the listening. Still, there was a spark to Marina, a hint of rebelliousness combined with a great depth of intelligence that made their friendship richer, and more fun. Besides, if trying to impress anyone was what mattered to Tess, she’d have stayed living in the Quad.
    Everything seemed to be going great, until the phone started ringing. Boys calling girls. Boys from UMass and Amherst and Hampshire College. Boys from as far away as Springfield College and American International. Boys calling girls: girls like Charlie and Marina.
    The calls were never for Tess. She didn’t have to be told why: she only had to look at Charlie, at Marina, then look in the mirror. Why would the boys want to be with her when they could be with them? Tess tried to reassure herself that it didn’t matter. She was who she was and she couldn’t change that. And anyway, Peter Hobart would be back at Amherst next year and she wouldn’t have to worry about any of it. Hopefully.
    Late one Saturday afternoon Tess was gathering her laundry to take down to the creepy cellar, when Charlie knocked on her door. She was dressed in a pink cowl-necked sweater and black jeans. She looked magnificent. Tess wanted to ask her what it felt like to have such a slim body, to know you always looked great, to know others thought so, too. Instead of asking, Tess whistled.
    Charlie smiled.
    “Who are we impressing tonight?” Tess asked.
    “Does this look okay?” Charlie asked. “I bought the sweater today. I shouldn’t have spent the money, but …”
    “No buts allowed,” Tess said. “You look great. Heavy date?”
    Charlie shrugged. “A guy from UMass. His name’s Dean. I met him up there at the library.”
    “Ah,” Tess said as she tossed a dirty sweatsuit into her growing clothes pile. “The notorious library.”
    Charlie leaned against the doorjamb. “Maybe you’d meet a guy if you’d go out more often. Other than with Marina and me.”
    Tess took a small box of Tide from her bureau, then bundled her clothes and dumped them into the plastic basket. “My schoolwork is more important to me right now.”
    Charlie shook her head. “It doesn’t seem right. You’re only nineteen. And you have such a great personality.”
    Tess felt her jaw tighten.
Such a great personality.
If she heard that term one more time she’d scream. It was as bad as the other one her mother always told her: “You have such a pretty face.” But Tess knew the truth. She was fat and plain and would never have the boys lined up at her door. Peter Hobart was her one chance.
    Tess changed the subject. “Where are you going tonight?”
    “Aqua Vitae.”
    “Is Marina going out, too?”
    “She’s been out all day with that guy from Hampshire College. Who knows when they’ll get back.”
    Tess heaved the laundry basket onto her hip. “She’s going to wear Viktor out.”
    Charlie nodded but didn’t smile. “Tess, I wish you’d think about what I said. About going out …”
    “Look,” Tess said, passing Charlie on the way to the door. “Stop worrying about me. I’m fine. I have tons of laundry to do. I’ll survive quite nicely spending a Saturday night alone. Besides, it’s a hell of