faded away and weren’t part of the equation, and so it was with great incongruity that she watched the saga of Jillian’s two dads unfold.
Why was Jillian’s birth triggering so many of her past issues at the same time that she was grappling with some very right-now issues, all wrapped up in the tall, dark, and handsome Dr. Alex Derjian? Every inhale, every exhale made her think of him, how his hands were on her, his lips exploring her in the elevator, how hot just being with him in the on-call room felt, how far she would have gone if baby Jillian’s emergence into the world hadn’t interrupted them.
Thanks, kid. She wasn’t sure whether to think that in her usual sarcastic tone, or whether it was genuinely heartfelt. Giving herself to Alex so soon might have been an enormous mistake, and now she was relieved that they’d been interrupted by nature, the visceral reality of what happens when two (or three…) people have sex and biology marches in its unyielding path toward fulfilling its pre-programmed destiny. No birth control? Then you roll the dice and take your chances.
Time to go see Laura and her little chance.
Alex walked into the hospital feeling more uncomfortable than he’d felt the first day of his residency. He never set foot on hospital grounds unless it was his shift. He was not the type to hang out, trying to curry favor or get in extra face time so that it looked like he was more serious about his work. When he was on shift, he was one hundred percent there—in mind, body, and spirit—and when he wasn’t on shift he stayed the hell away, because otherwise this job, this vocation, could completely consume his soul.
Walking into the hospital wearing jeans, a polo shirt, and sunglasses made him feel like a civilian. He headed in and, on autopilot, found his body directing him to the changing area where he would put on scrubs and turn into a doctor, morphing from a human being to someone who was supposed to be both humble and god-like; know everything but be flexible when a patient had an idea that he had never heard of; be proficient at paperwork and yet drop everything the second a medical emergency came up; have outstanding social skills and yet know when to keep his mouth shut; be gloriously ecstatic for a family when the birth of a healthy little baby came to fruition after a long labor—and be respectfully mournful when it didn’t.
Doctors—and especially OBs—were expected to be omnipresent, omniscient in some ways, and to be everything for everyone. And for some cases, to stay as far away as possible so that nature could do its work.
Entering the elevator after backtracking a bit from the changing area, he pushed the button for the maternity ward and then realized that he was going to the postpartum wing, furiously pressing a different number as he shook his head. A bundle of nerves this morning, he found himself worried about what he was wearing, which was insanely stupid because he never worried about what he was wearing. He just put on clean clothes and went about his day.
He knew exactly why he was here on his day off and why he was so nervous. It was a little bundle of joy—but it wasn’t Laura’s baby. It was Josie and the taste of something far outside his expectations that he’d gotten yesterday with her—and not just the raunchy taste that he had thoroughly enjoyed, too—that made him want more. His life was so circumscribed—work, the occasional trip with his grandfather, and more work—that when a flash of something deeper, of a connection so intense that he overrode all professional instinct and nearly took her in the on-call room—when that came along and was handed to him in the form of fate, he needed to seize it.
Coming in on his day off, lingering in the postpartum wing looking like your average Joe, meant that maybe he’d run into her and maybe he’d be able to convince her to go for a walk, or grab a cup of coffee. Could they do something that seemed
Why was Jillian’s birth triggering so many of her past issues at the same time that she was grappling with some very right-now issues, all wrapped up in the tall, dark, and handsome Dr. Alex Derjian? Every inhale, every exhale made her think of him, how his hands were on her, his lips exploring her in the elevator, how hot just being with him in the on-call room felt, how far she would have gone if baby Jillian’s emergence into the world hadn’t interrupted them.
Thanks, kid. She wasn’t sure whether to think that in her usual sarcastic tone, or whether it was genuinely heartfelt. Giving herself to Alex so soon might have been an enormous mistake, and now she was relieved that they’d been interrupted by nature, the visceral reality of what happens when two (or three…) people have sex and biology marches in its unyielding path toward fulfilling its pre-programmed destiny. No birth control? Then you roll the dice and take your chances.
Time to go see Laura and her little chance.
Alex walked into the hospital feeling more uncomfortable than he’d felt the first day of his residency. He never set foot on hospital grounds unless it was his shift. He was not the type to hang out, trying to curry favor or get in extra face time so that it looked like he was more serious about his work. When he was on shift, he was one hundred percent there—in mind, body, and spirit—and when he wasn’t on shift he stayed the hell away, because otherwise this job, this vocation, could completely consume his soul.
Walking into the hospital wearing jeans, a polo shirt, and sunglasses made him feel like a civilian. He headed in and, on autopilot, found his body directing him to the changing area where he would put on scrubs and turn into a doctor, morphing from a human being to someone who was supposed to be both humble and god-like; know everything but be flexible when a patient had an idea that he had never heard of; be proficient at paperwork and yet drop everything the second a medical emergency came up; have outstanding social skills and yet know when to keep his mouth shut; be gloriously ecstatic for a family when the birth of a healthy little baby came to fruition after a long labor—and be respectfully mournful when it didn’t.
Doctors—and especially OBs—were expected to be omnipresent, omniscient in some ways, and to be everything for everyone. And for some cases, to stay as far away as possible so that nature could do its work.
Entering the elevator after backtracking a bit from the changing area, he pushed the button for the maternity ward and then realized that he was going to the postpartum wing, furiously pressing a different number as he shook his head. A bundle of nerves this morning, he found himself worried about what he was wearing, which was insanely stupid because he never worried about what he was wearing. He just put on clean clothes and went about his day.
He knew exactly why he was here on his day off and why he was so nervous. It was a little bundle of joy—but it wasn’t Laura’s baby. It was Josie and the taste of something far outside his expectations that he’d gotten yesterday with her—and not just the raunchy taste that he had thoroughly enjoyed, too—that made him want more. His life was so circumscribed—work, the occasional trip with his grandfather, and more work—that when a flash of something deeper, of a connection so intense that he overrode all professional instinct and nearly took her in the on-call room—when that came along and was handed to him in the form of fate, he needed to seize it.
Coming in on his day off, lingering in the postpartum wing looking like your average Joe, meant that maybe he’d run into her and maybe he’d be able to convince her to go for a walk, or grab a cup of coffee. Could they do something that seemed
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