Nellie said nothing, Will was tempted to retract his words, if
only to hold onto the promise of what they could have together. But the fact
was, he wasn't someone Mike or any other kid should look up to. He was a loner,
had been since he was sixteen, and he wasn't heading down that dead end path,
even if it meant an end to what he could have with Nellie. She deserved better.
***
That evening
they dropped anchor in a quiet cove off the east coast of Vancouver Island and
had a light dinner of prepared crab cakes, which were heated in the microwave,
accompanied by stove-top scalloped potatoes from a box. Mike, exhausted from
his first day of bracing his legs against a rocking boat, went to bed early.
The wind had driven off the clouds and the sky was clear, so Nellie went to
join Will on deck. Once away from Port Townsend, she'd given little thought to
the two men they'd left behind. For now, she felt safe with Will in that sense,
but more than apprehensive about where their relationship was headed... if
there was even a chance for a relationship now. But maybe it wasn't the
marriage commitment Will was avoiding, but the fact that Mike was part of the
package. Not just Mike. Mike or any other
kid , he'd said. And she wanted to know why. But she refused to spoil a
star-filled night on deck with Will, addressing his hang up about children. She
found him sitting on a rolled-out sleeping bag on the fantail deck, gazing
across the water. "Mind if I join you?" she asked.
Will moved
over, and said, "I was hoping you would."
Nellie sat
beside him. Drawing her legs up, she wrapped her arms around her knees so she
wouldn't be tempted to reach out to him. All afternoon she again toyed with the
idea of entering into a relationship that would include intimacy without
commitment, but in the end, she still wanted it all. Love, intimacy,
commitment, and a father for Mike. A family joined by marriage. And all Will
wanted was intimacy. Attempting to dismiss that worrisome thought, she looked
across the water, and said, "When I was a child, I'd sit on deck in this
very spot while Uncle Vern pointed out the constellations." Her gaze
followed the faint band of light of the Milky Way as it arched across the sky,
then darted from one bright star of the Summer Triangle to the next. " Deneb ... Vega... Altair." She laughed spontaneously.
"I'm surprised I remember the names."
"It's also
called the Navigator's Triangle," Will added, "the first stars of
evening, so bright the navigator can get a fix on them while there's still
enough light to see the horizon."
"Look
there! Draco the Dragon," Nellie pointed to the stars curving around the
Little Dipper like a big question mark. "Draco guards the Golden Apples.
He lives in a beautiful garden beyond the mountains on which Atlas stands, and a band of nymphs dance around him, singing
entrancing songs to keep him awake. See his eyes sparkling as they
dance..." She continued with her tale, at last ending with, "...but
slow-witted Atlas resumed his burden, and Hercules returned with the Golden
Apples." She waited for Will's response. When he said nothing, she asked,
"So what did you think?"
"About
what?"
"Draco the
Dragon." In the tenuous light, she caught Will's endearing smile and felt
flutters inside her tummy. Strange how he affected her that way. "What's
so amusing?" she asked.
"You. I
could see the little girl you used to be." Will trailed his finger along
her arm, tracing a path to her hand. "You seem contented tonight," he
said, capturing her hand in his.
Nellie felt a
tiny shutter as Will's hand curled around hers. "I am for the
moment," she replied. Although she knew it was impermanent, she couldn't
remember when she'd felt such a sense of calm. Nothing was solved. She had no
job, no money, no car. And Mike's life was unsettled.
Nor was there anything established between her and Will. But for now, nothing
seemed to matter but the warmth growing inside from the feel of Will's hand
holding hers,
only to hold onto the promise of what they could have together. But the fact
was, he wasn't someone Mike or any other kid should look up to. He was a loner,
had been since he was sixteen, and he wasn't heading down that dead end path,
even if it meant an end to what he could have with Nellie. She deserved better.
***
That evening
they dropped anchor in a quiet cove off the east coast of Vancouver Island and
had a light dinner of prepared crab cakes, which were heated in the microwave,
accompanied by stove-top scalloped potatoes from a box. Mike, exhausted from
his first day of bracing his legs against a rocking boat, went to bed early.
The wind had driven off the clouds and the sky was clear, so Nellie went to
join Will on deck. Once away from Port Townsend, she'd given little thought to
the two men they'd left behind. For now, she felt safe with Will in that sense,
but more than apprehensive about where their relationship was headed... if
there was even a chance for a relationship now. But maybe it wasn't the
marriage commitment Will was avoiding, but the fact that Mike was part of the
package. Not just Mike. Mike or any other
kid , he'd said. And she wanted to know why. But she refused to spoil a
star-filled night on deck with Will, addressing his hang up about children. She
found him sitting on a rolled-out sleeping bag on the fantail deck, gazing
across the water. "Mind if I join you?" she asked.
Will moved
over, and said, "I was hoping you would."
Nellie sat
beside him. Drawing her legs up, she wrapped her arms around her knees so she
wouldn't be tempted to reach out to him. All afternoon she again toyed with the
idea of entering into a relationship that would include intimacy without
commitment, but in the end, she still wanted it all. Love, intimacy,
commitment, and a father for Mike. A family joined by marriage. And all Will
wanted was intimacy. Attempting to dismiss that worrisome thought, she looked
across the water, and said, "When I was a child, I'd sit on deck in this
very spot while Uncle Vern pointed out the constellations." Her gaze
followed the faint band of light of the Milky Way as it arched across the sky,
then darted from one bright star of the Summer Triangle to the next. " Deneb ... Vega... Altair." She laughed spontaneously.
"I'm surprised I remember the names."
"It's also
called the Navigator's Triangle," Will added, "the first stars of
evening, so bright the navigator can get a fix on them while there's still
enough light to see the horizon."
"Look
there! Draco the Dragon," Nellie pointed to the stars curving around the
Little Dipper like a big question mark. "Draco guards the Golden Apples.
He lives in a beautiful garden beyond the mountains on which Atlas stands, and a band of nymphs dance around him, singing
entrancing songs to keep him awake. See his eyes sparkling as they
dance..." She continued with her tale, at last ending with, "...but
slow-witted Atlas resumed his burden, and Hercules returned with the Golden
Apples." She waited for Will's response. When he said nothing, she asked,
"So what did you think?"
"About
what?"
"Draco the
Dragon." In the tenuous light, she caught Will's endearing smile and felt
flutters inside her tummy. Strange how he affected her that way. "What's
so amusing?" she asked.
"You. I
could see the little girl you used to be." Will trailed his finger along
her arm, tracing a path to her hand. "You seem contented tonight," he
said, capturing her hand in his.
Nellie felt a
tiny shutter as Will's hand curled around hers. "I am for the
moment," she replied. Although she knew it was impermanent, she couldn't
remember when she'd felt such a sense of calm. Nothing was solved. She had no
job, no money, no car. And Mike's life was unsettled.
Nor was there anything established between her and Will. But for now, nothing
seemed to matter but the warmth growing inside from the feel of Will's hand
holding hers,
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