day,' I said.
'Whatever gives you happiness,' she said softly. 'I just know you’ll never make a thoughtless move.'
I wasn’t surprised at her acceptance of my statement. Nor did she encourage me to hanker after more money or status. She had always been ever supportive and understanding, as if she knew my innermost feelings.
While we were talking, Rajan walked into the room and said, 'You guys always scare me with your serious conversations!’ I grinned at him. ‘Ma, how come you always say yes to whatever Amit says?'
Ma just smiled but he was right. Beyond our temporary disagreements on minor issues, there had never been any conflict in my relationship with my mother. It could be because she never really opposed me or because she understood me completely, or both.
Rajan interrupted my flow of thoughts as he started mimicking a couple of Australians he had met that day. I had a hearty laugh because that was not how they spoke at all but, coming from Rajan, every word was comedic.
Before we knew it, it was time for our mother to go back to India. Rajan stayed back as he had been sponsored by a company and now had a work visa. After she left, I felt terrible because I had barely spent time with her. She had not come here to see my car and my flat, the buildings and the tourist attractions. She had come to see me.
In December, I finished my bachelor's degree, six months in advance. A three-year degree that was reduced to two years because of the exemptions eventually got completed in eighteen months because I did the additional subjects in summer and as well as winter school.
My life was finally stable now, with my basic education complete and a steady income coming in. Since I had arrived in Australia, I hadn’t really had the time to focus on myself, on my inner life. My sadhana had not intensified or improved. Now, as things settled around me, the void that had always been within, but veiled briefly by my external pursuits, bared itself to me again.
My goal of renunciation was clear to me and I knew exactly where I was headed. But it wasn’t time yet. I had to be certain I wasn't choosing the spiritual path as an escape from the material challenges of the world. To achieve the pinnacle of material success and then to walk away would be a far truer renunciation. If I had nothing to lose in the first place, what was I renouncing? I wanted to make sure my intent for spiritual life was clear and pure.
But I wondered if working for others was the way forward. No matter how much I made as an employee, I would have to work till I retired. And if I continued to work this way, when would I have the time to explore my own soul? Driving a convertible sports car to work didn't have the same charm now as it had in the first couple of months. My pay cheque, which had got me so excited earlier, felt like an ordinary piece of paper. The routine was starting to feel boring and I realized I needed to make some changes. It occurred to me that what I did for IWN, I could easily do for myself. I figured that building my own business would be an interesting and rewarding venture now.
IWN gave me a Christmas bonus of $20,000 after I earned more than two million dollars in revenue for them. I came home and showed Rajan the cheque.
'Wow! Let's celebrate,' he said.
'Absolutely. But first I have to send an important email.'
I wrote to Dan and then turned off my phone.
'Okay, let's go for a movie and a dinner. I really want to celebrate today.'
At the restaurant, I kept staring at the menu and chuckling to myself.
'What's the matter, why are you laughing?'
'You know, brother, life's like a menu. We have to make choices, we can't have everything. Even if we can afford it all, even if we want to eat it all, we simply can’t. We must pick what delights us and not just order the first item on the menu. Today, I’ve made a choice too.'
'I get nervous with your cryptic talks, man. What did you do? What choice? Tell me in
'Whatever gives you happiness,' she said softly. 'I just know you’ll never make a thoughtless move.'
I wasn’t surprised at her acceptance of my statement. Nor did she encourage me to hanker after more money or status. She had always been ever supportive and understanding, as if she knew my innermost feelings.
While we were talking, Rajan walked into the room and said, 'You guys always scare me with your serious conversations!’ I grinned at him. ‘Ma, how come you always say yes to whatever Amit says?'
Ma just smiled but he was right. Beyond our temporary disagreements on minor issues, there had never been any conflict in my relationship with my mother. It could be because she never really opposed me or because she understood me completely, or both.
Rajan interrupted my flow of thoughts as he started mimicking a couple of Australians he had met that day. I had a hearty laugh because that was not how they spoke at all but, coming from Rajan, every word was comedic.
Before we knew it, it was time for our mother to go back to India. Rajan stayed back as he had been sponsored by a company and now had a work visa. After she left, I felt terrible because I had barely spent time with her. She had not come here to see my car and my flat, the buildings and the tourist attractions. She had come to see me.
In December, I finished my bachelor's degree, six months in advance. A three-year degree that was reduced to two years because of the exemptions eventually got completed in eighteen months because I did the additional subjects in summer and as well as winter school.
My life was finally stable now, with my basic education complete and a steady income coming in. Since I had arrived in Australia, I hadn’t really had the time to focus on myself, on my inner life. My sadhana had not intensified or improved. Now, as things settled around me, the void that had always been within, but veiled briefly by my external pursuits, bared itself to me again.
My goal of renunciation was clear to me and I knew exactly where I was headed. But it wasn’t time yet. I had to be certain I wasn't choosing the spiritual path as an escape from the material challenges of the world. To achieve the pinnacle of material success and then to walk away would be a far truer renunciation. If I had nothing to lose in the first place, what was I renouncing? I wanted to make sure my intent for spiritual life was clear and pure.
But I wondered if working for others was the way forward. No matter how much I made as an employee, I would have to work till I retired. And if I continued to work this way, when would I have the time to explore my own soul? Driving a convertible sports car to work didn't have the same charm now as it had in the first couple of months. My pay cheque, which had got me so excited earlier, felt like an ordinary piece of paper. The routine was starting to feel boring and I realized I needed to make some changes. It occurred to me that what I did for IWN, I could easily do for myself. I figured that building my own business would be an interesting and rewarding venture now.
IWN gave me a Christmas bonus of $20,000 after I earned more than two million dollars in revenue for them. I came home and showed Rajan the cheque.
'Wow! Let's celebrate,' he said.
'Absolutely. But first I have to send an important email.'
I wrote to Dan and then turned off my phone.
'Okay, let's go for a movie and a dinner. I really want to celebrate today.'
At the restaurant, I kept staring at the menu and chuckling to myself.
'What's the matter, why are you laughing?'
'You know, brother, life's like a menu. We have to make choices, we can't have everything. Even if we can afford it all, even if we want to eat it all, we simply can’t. We must pick what delights us and not just order the first item on the menu. Today, I’ve made a choice too.'
'I get nervous with your cryptic talks, man. What did you do? What choice? Tell me in
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