Humanity's Death: A Zombie Epic
pulled him deeper and deeper into the dark and wild
wilderness. As the day grew darker, his eyes closed and he kept
them closed. His legs hurt under the thick straps holding him down.
What was happening? He'd been doing so well for nearly a year,
hardly any troubles considering the nature fo the New World. Then,
just like that, the tables had turned.
    No, this can't be happening. All a dream, just a
bad dream that would end soon. He’d wake up and see his Sally
Fighart at any moment. “Just a dream Drew! Wake up you dirty
scoundrel. Didn’t you hear? I made varsity this year! Aren’t you
happy for me?”
    “Yes Sally, course of I'm happy for you. But…
why did you have to go and start dating Barry Darkwood? You always
said…”
    Sally had cut him off, “I always said I’d never
date a preppy.”
    And Barry Darkwood wore his polo’s flipped up
around the collar like some flashback to the 80s. His fancy cars,
he had three of them, all paid for by his dear ole father, Judge
Barry Darkwood the first, which of course made Barry Darkwood the
second biggest asshole in all of Horry county.
    By junior year Sally had turned into a red fire
bomb of a sexy looker. Her breasts developed into full C cups and
her once long, thin, bird legs radicalized into lean mean running
machines and her rump as a firm piece of muscle that perked its way
into every high school boy’s lingering, horny field of vision.
    And she’d
fallen for Barry fucking Darkwood, the single biggest prick in all
the land. And Sally took it further when Andrew pointed this out,
“Yeah he does have a big prick. And I tell you now… I like it.”
    “Great. He is just the all in one package.”
    “I call him The Total Package.”
    One year later, much to Sally’s dismay and
dripping tears, Barry Darkwood forget she existed after he
disappeared in the California college scene, two thousand miles
away. She'd held on to Andrew like a sad puppy. “You can’t trust
men with big cocks. That’s what I am taking away from this. Never
trust a man with a big cock.” She’d then slipped her hand into
Andrew’s pants and made the confirmation that he possessed the
qualities of a fine, trustworthy, and decent man. After that
moment, despite his obsessing calls, Andrew never saw or heard from
Sally again until that fateful day at the Piggly Wiggly.
    Those days died and Andrew’s haze started to
lift. The old woman rambled her autobiography, jumping from story
to story without offering much consistency. She once been a real
looker. A real doll. Something everyman wanted. Then she was a
little girl, just a play thing for her brothers and daddy. Used her
up, spit her out. We all’s just meat after all. Then them boys done
found her and used her in a dark alley. Then she was in love with a
real man. A real winner. Donny Jumper she called him. A real
winner. Then she was back at a hospital holding Donny’s hand.
Cancer they said. Couldn’t save Donny. He died for sure. We all’s
just meat after all.
    Then she was homeless. Not a penny to her name.
People throwing rocks at her. Calling her names. She started to cry
then made herself stop. “Gonna show yous some pain now!” She turned
and in a revengeful fit raised her foot high a kicked Andrew hard
in the temple. A shiny white shimmer glowed in his mind and he
heard a high pitch ringing. Then the dragging commenced, this time
in silence.
    12
    Wild life croaked from the dark trees. Rain was
falling hard now and his head pounded with nauseating pain. His
throat felt like sand paper and the green around him blurred in a
haze of dizziness. He shut them tightly. He transported his mind
back to a moment in time when hot sparks flew against his face
mask. He was helping Tommy Tyler—who owned Tommy Tyler’s Auto Mart
and Mechanics.
    Tommy stood over him rubbing his double chin. He
wore a white t-shirt that clung over a big fat belly that hung over
a thick brown belt that overshadowed his crotch. His arms were thin
rails

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