when they were out. Cathy was clearly not yet home.
‘I suppose so.’ She hesitated. It seemed weird. She’d always imagined some hotel or other as the location where she’d eventually lose her virginity. Somewhere a bit nice, but unspecific. Just the act itself was the important thing. Her body, and the man’s.
‘Sorry, I’m getting ahead of myself again,’ said Ellis, kissing her hand again. ‘Forget it. I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable. You’ve got me so crazy that I want you anywhere, but if you prefer neutral ground, I think I can keep myself in check long enough to drive to the hotel, or even to my place. It’s your choice, Jess. I just want you to feel at ease.’
It could all go pear shaped now. Hesitation could lead to postponement. Postponement could lead to, well, him changing his mind in the cooler light of day, and thinking,
What the hell was I doing? A nearly thirty year old virgin? Not really …
‘No, it’s okay. Cathy’s not home. My room might be a little bit untidy if you don’t mind slumming it … and I think I might actually feel more relaxed, in my own space. Do you know what I mean?’
‘Oh, you angel!’ Grabbing her by the shoulders, he kissed her hard and quickly. Then in a flash – perhaps before she could change her mind – he was out of the car, round to the passenger side, and handing her out into the night air. Within moments they were on the pavement, and hurrying inside.
Jess was self-conscious, aware that her cheeks were pink and blushing, and that any passer-by could read from that exactly what she’d been doing with Ellis and to Ellis in the car. He, on the other hand, appeared sublimely unconcerned, as cool and suave as ever. Jess daren’t look at his groin to see if he was still sporting his erection, but she didn’t doubt that he wouldn’t be embarrassed if he was.
But there was only one other person in the street. A middle-aged woman in a fleece and jeans, with her dog on a leash. The bumptious canine was bounding around, and his owner’s full attention was on him, rather than a pair of potential lovers thirty yards away on the other pavement.
Never before had her own front door seemed so daunting. She could still change her mind once she was inside, but somehow, it didn’t seem that way. The threshold to the house was like jumping off a cliff, like skydiving. Once she was in there was no return. Her fingers fumbled with the key, clattering against the lock. Ellis took it from her and manipulated it easily.
Key into lock. A simple act. But suddenly a metaphor.
Hearing her gasp, Ellis glanced at Jess, and saw that she was on the same page. Good grief, she was blushing like a schoolgirl. Exactly like the virgin she was.
‘You’re adorable.’ Ellis touched her cheek, pressing his palm against the heat. ‘You’re beautiful. Don’t be anxious, Jess. I desire you … you desire me … We’ll have a wonderful time together.’
As she turned her face to kiss his hand, he tried the door, ready to push it open. Jess leapt away from him, as if there were a throng of people waiting inside, but he corralled her, his arm sliding around her waist.
‘Don’t worry,’ he reiterated, ‘it’ll be fine. Now, is there an alarm code we need to deal with?’
‘Yes, it’s 1812.’ She grinned, as if finding the nerve she’d momentarily lost. ‘And yes, I know, it’s pretty obvious.’
‘Only to a music lover or a history nut.’ Ellis winked at her. He needed her to relax, but he felt more apprehensive himself than he had done for a long time with a woman. Why did this feel like as big a step somehow as his first ever fuck after Julie?
Once inside, he silenced the beeping alarm, and returned Jess’s key to her, watching her lock up again and slip her key in her bag.
‘Cathy can get in with her own key. Wouldn’t want some slimy burglar to come in and nick things while we’re … um … While we’re busy.’
‘While we’re making love,’
‘I suppose so.’ She hesitated. It seemed weird. She’d always imagined some hotel or other as the location where she’d eventually lose her virginity. Somewhere a bit nice, but unspecific. Just the act itself was the important thing. Her body, and the man’s.
‘Sorry, I’m getting ahead of myself again,’ said Ellis, kissing her hand again. ‘Forget it. I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable. You’ve got me so crazy that I want you anywhere, but if you prefer neutral ground, I think I can keep myself in check long enough to drive to the hotel, or even to my place. It’s your choice, Jess. I just want you to feel at ease.’
It could all go pear shaped now. Hesitation could lead to postponement. Postponement could lead to, well, him changing his mind in the cooler light of day, and thinking,
What the hell was I doing? A nearly thirty year old virgin? Not really …
‘No, it’s okay. Cathy’s not home. My room might be a little bit untidy if you don’t mind slumming it … and I think I might actually feel more relaxed, in my own space. Do you know what I mean?’
‘Oh, you angel!’ Grabbing her by the shoulders, he kissed her hard and quickly. Then in a flash – perhaps before she could change her mind – he was out of the car, round to the passenger side, and handing her out into the night air. Within moments they were on the pavement, and hurrying inside.
Jess was self-conscious, aware that her cheeks were pink and blushing, and that any passer-by could read from that exactly what she’d been doing with Ellis and to Ellis in the car. He, on the other hand, appeared sublimely unconcerned, as cool and suave as ever. Jess daren’t look at his groin to see if he was still sporting his erection, but she didn’t doubt that he wouldn’t be embarrassed if he was.
But there was only one other person in the street. A middle-aged woman in a fleece and jeans, with her dog on a leash. The bumptious canine was bounding around, and his owner’s full attention was on him, rather than a pair of potential lovers thirty yards away on the other pavement.
Never before had her own front door seemed so daunting. She could still change her mind once she was inside, but somehow, it didn’t seem that way. The threshold to the house was like jumping off a cliff, like skydiving. Once she was in there was no return. Her fingers fumbled with the key, clattering against the lock. Ellis took it from her and manipulated it easily.
Key into lock. A simple act. But suddenly a metaphor.
Hearing her gasp, Ellis glanced at Jess, and saw that she was on the same page. Good grief, she was blushing like a schoolgirl. Exactly like the virgin she was.
‘You’re adorable.’ Ellis touched her cheek, pressing his palm against the heat. ‘You’re beautiful. Don’t be anxious, Jess. I desire you … you desire me … We’ll have a wonderful time together.’
As she turned her face to kiss his hand, he tried the door, ready to push it open. Jess leapt away from him, as if there were a throng of people waiting inside, but he corralled her, his arm sliding around her waist.
‘Don’t worry,’ he reiterated, ‘it’ll be fine. Now, is there an alarm code we need to deal with?’
‘Yes, it’s 1812.’ She grinned, as if finding the nerve she’d momentarily lost. ‘And yes, I know, it’s pretty obvious.’
‘Only to a music lover or a history nut.’ Ellis winked at her. He needed her to relax, but he felt more apprehensive himself than he had done for a long time with a woman. Why did this feel like as big a step somehow as his first ever fuck after Julie?
Once inside, he silenced the beeping alarm, and returned Jess’s key to her, watching her lock up again and slip her key in her bag.
‘Cathy can get in with her own key. Wouldn’t want some slimy burglar to come in and nick things while we’re … um … While we’re busy.’
‘While we’re making love,’
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